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A Story About Someone Else’s Ass

Last week I had a huge portion of my extended family in town for the wedding of one of my cousins, perhaps The Prettiest Man on Earth. See:

How to Annoy Me

Sneeze and spew 40 Cheerios out of your mouth across the room. One at a time, baby. ONE. AT. A. TIME.

40 Weeks


All questions must be submitted in writing

Leta awoke yesterday morning to her usual bottle, or so she thought as she grabbed it in hunger. She hadn’t taken a bottle since 6 PM the previous night, and so she was starving like a normal baby who hasn’t had anything to eat in 13 hours. You’d think that the taste of something delightfully [...]


“Have you brushed your teeth today?” “Vote Kerry/Edwards! John Kerry 2004!” “Huh?” “I think it’s important that this family vote for John Kerry.” “I understand that. But –” “– But what? It’s much more important that we vote for John Kerry than knowing whether or not I brushed my teeth today.” “You haven’t brushed your [...]

Tiny Bubbles

Our Benevolent Dictator . . .

Is okay. Everything came back okay. Leta is groggy and CRANKY, but she is okay. The whole family is exhausted including Chuck who had to go all day long without treats. Thank you for your thoughts and email and comments. It’s time for bed.

The Former Congressman