The calm before the storm

  • Leon as Joseph Conrad

    “Come here. Close to me. All that you are now, have been and hold dear is not really you. Remember, there is no more empty and detestable creature in nature than a man who… runs…away…from his demon. No…faith…. No…fear. The horror. The horror.”

  • Rebekah

    If there is nothing ever said again about this photo by Heather I am going to be mad. This is really starting to bother me. Is it supposed to be a cliff hanger?

  • Sue from Ohio

    I hope everything is OK…

  • j


  • TracyDee

    OMG!!! Y’all are oh-so-funny today…. I forgot what I was going to write about the picture :)

  • Amanda B.

    psssst. everybody. try this.

    Dooooce. You are the prettiest lady of all time. You are tall and thin and lovely and my god! How DO you look like that after having a baby?

    And you are smart. Very smart and intelligent and eduacable. I mean educated. And you are also very bright and sharp and witty.

    Did I say funny…someone should elaborate on Funny…

  • George Lover

    Is this starting to sound like it’s all about us?

  • Leon picking up Amanda’s torch and running with it

    Dooce, you are funnier than a clench fisted revolution against the balled tyranny of Tickledom

    Funnier than a frog legged votive candle hucking baby

    Who’s next?

  • Next

    Dooce, you are funnier than a limp dick for a windshield wiper . . . (one of my favorites!)

  • Colleen from NJ

    funnier than a candy-cane-humping pig next to Thanksgiving turkey.

  • Sheryl

    *Classier than a Shit Ass Ho Muthafucka*

  • the niffer

    Funnier than a star-spangled floor mat.

    Wait. That’s not funny.

  • GirlA.

    *More fun and liberating than a FOUR-DAY POOPING STREAK.*

  • GirlA.

    More lovely and enigmatic than a dimly lit black and white photo with a foreign subtitle.

  • Amanda B.

    More purtier than Giselle.

  • GirlA.

    *Faster than a speeding gazelle!*


  • Gia on Guam

    Cool Red Shoes, Lettuce Boobs & No poop blues.

  • Gia on Guam

    Cabbage Boobs…I knew I was mistaken as soon as I hit ‘post’

  • One of them snarly guys from Oasis

    She’s fuk’n brilliant, that one.

  • krisitne

    Alyx was 9 months old when I found I was pregnant with Shea.

    Is Chuck ready for this? hee hee.


  • espressoblogger

    A codpiece would do little to protect his reproductive organs. You see, it’s not the wang that is the centre of sensitivity, but rather, the family mules. I mean, jewels.


    A little Far Side reference there.

  • Fran

    Storms never last, do they baby
    Bad times all pass with the wind (even if it’s your husband’s farting on you)
    Your hand in his stills the thunder
    And you make the sun want to shine

  • Calm before the stormc

    I should’ve been more careful
    I should’ve seen the signs
    While all was calm, I guess
    I should’ve read between the lines
    So, now I’m standin’ in the cold, hard rain
    Instead of with you safe and warm
    A fool who took your love for granted
    In the calm before the storm

  • tiffany

    I’m really trying to get into the mysteriousness of it all, but all I keep thinking is: Those of you who want to know what the storm is must not have kids. I could be missing something, but when I saw this picture and read the caption, I figured it was a picture taken in the early morning hours before Leta woke up… simply a photo to describe the way a house that has a baby in it takes a deep breath to brace itself for the day.

  • kristine – More comments than Dave Barry’s blog.

  • Shiz

    We love dooce!

  • KFrog

    So . . . the storm is your period?
    Now I’m confused.

  • dj blurb

    Originator of the titanium codpiece: Greg Proops.

  • juli

    The storm is metaphorical, it is not any one thing—many things—nothing. It just is.

    I stole your daily photo idea. Sue me, I could use the excitement.

  • DeAnn

    I’m so curious what’s going on here. It’s, like, killing me!

    (Not really. I’m still alive and hope to be for many many years.)

  • Maggie

    The storm is the period! Dun dun dun, que the dramatic music. Don’t worry Dooce, at least it’ll all be over with before Christmas. Hurrah for that, right? P.S.-you people are crazy. Pregnant? I think Heather will remove her own hoo-haa before that happens again.

  • Joan

    Vacuuming the dog isn’t so bad, I use the leaf blower to get the dust off my horse!

  • dre


  • cheryl


  • mike

    tres darkness!

  • Sara

    What storm?

  • cory


  • Michael

    wicked dahk

  • Chessy

    I have always liked the shots that were illuminated just by lamplight. I have a collection, actually. It is sort of sad.

  • Deenzadrine


  • Dr. Johnny Fever

    Hope it’s a lightning storm so we can see what the hell’s going on.

  • Deenzadrine

    Wait…was this right before you tried to vacuum the dog? ;-)

  • Sarah

    Right before you powered up the vacuum, right? And Leta commenced with the screaming?

  • bb

    My no flash pics never look like that!
    Top 10!

  • Red

    Witness protection program?

  • Michael

    yeah… what is this storm that seems to be brewing? Is it just before Leta wakes up and is inaugurated as “queen mcscreamy”

  • Eric

    Cmon Leta wake up! Chuck! Chuck!

  • Sherri


  • Alex

    That looks like George’s head.

  • Susie

    OK, now this one is just begging for verbal elaboration. A thousand words would be worth more than the picture. Come on . . .

    Deenzadrine, that’s funny.