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Killer

2005/01/05



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  • http://shiz.typepad.com/ Shiz

    Ewwwwwwwww … more colon talk.

  • http://shiz.typepad.com/ Shiz

    I mean GREAT! Let’s talk about the colon!

    Seriously, I read so many mixed reports about colon cleansing. Some say do, some say don’t. The do makes a bit more sense to me now, but heck, why don’t I ask my doctor?

  • http://www.aaronboswell.com pixie

    Just don’t confuse the red iguana with the blue iguana (and I’m talking food establishments here). Red is much better than blue! Mmmm….smothered burrito….

  • http://www.dooce.com Amanda B.

    I look at colon cleansing like I do gerbils. “Hey you, stay out of my ass!”

  • http://nowhere.com moose

    A. Best thumbnail ever.
    B. Seeing the other photo just shows how good Heather’s photos really are…
    http://rediguana.citysearch.com/
    …as if we didn’t know that already.
    C. I think GirlA has a *special* google touch.

  • victoria

    So, I entered that CitySearch html, and learned that the Red Iguana is informing its customers, “We now sell alcoholic beverages such as maragaritas, tequila shots and wine.”

    You mean, you used to NOT sell alcoholic beverages such as margaritas, tequila shots, and wine?

  • http://symbioticfishes.blogspot.com Fish

    Oh, sure, Amanda, you won’t let gerbils in there, but you’ll stick your finger into every else’s!

    *fish backs up against the wall to protect himself from pooka*

  • http://krissypants.blogspot.com krissy pants

    Did anyone else check out the Elk Ivory Jewelry? Beauuuuu ti ful!

  • Leon

    I’ve never eaten Red Iguana.

    Does it taste like chicken?

  • http://dirtyfloorsandfilthyjokes.blogspot.com/ closet metro

    Fish – my thoughts exactly.

    *Metro brandishes a gerbil and backs up against the wall to protect him from the Ring Sting of Pooka*

  • http://bethology.blogspot.com Beth

    Now that’ll clear ya out. Screw the whole taint pressing issue – eat some killer Mexican food!

  • Leon

    …and more importantly, just how many dishes can you make out of Red Iguana anyway?

    Must be a really short menu.

  • http://holyschmidt.blogspot.com Melanie S

    Look at it this way. After you have a colonic, your tummy will be SO flat, your skin is clearer, you feel SO good. If you can handle a pap smear, you’;ll do better with a colonic. It’s not painful at all.

    Poop talk rocks the camel’s ass!

  • http://www.dooce.com Amanda B.

    *Amanda kneads hands…plotting sneak attack against Metro and Fish*

  • http://someadventure.blogspot.com/ Girl.A

    Dudes, thanks for the google praise but I don’t have to google shit when I know how to go straight there.

    I like colonics, you do feel a lot lighter and leaner afterward. I do them before long hiking/climbing trips in the summer.

    Except sometimes it can be disconcerting to see the little critters waving as they go by in the tube. Hi, Choriso & Eggs! Goodbye, Mister Jimmy Dean! Come bac to the Five & Dime real soon.

    Of course, only after you’ve been reincarnated as non fecal matter.

  • http://www.dooce.com Amanda B.

    Girl A.- i doubted your skillz and i am sorry.

    That reminds me about how I’ve never understood hetero ummm…backdoor lovin. I mean, whatever dude. We can engage in all of that you want just as soon as you let me insert a lightly greased medium sized cucumber-squash into *your* special “exit only” area.

    Hrmph.

  • http://symbioticfishes.blogspot.com Fish

    Cucumber squash? I thought we were talking about purple iguanas.

  • http://www.veryzen.blogspot.com Amanda B.

    Well, that would work too.

  • http://dirtyfloorsandfilthyjokes.blogspot.com/ closet metro

    AmandaB -

    “We can engage in all of that…”

    Did you just proposition the whole internet?

  • Carol

    LMAO!! AmandaB!! I agree with you on the back door lovin…. yeah, OK, honey… you first!
    GirlA – I’d get a colonic, if it weren’t for where they stick that clear garden hose. *pucker*

  • http://thefathousewife.blogspot.com/ Mrs.Stray

    These comments have successfully gone from red lizards to anal sex.

  • Carol

    Key word being “successfully”

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    Doesn’t everything here eventually come back to the ass?

    Uh, not that there’s anything *wrong* with that. . .

    Willing Ass-Talk Participant

  • http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily_photo/01_05_2005.html Circus Kelli

    closet metro said at 11:37AM, 01.05.2005:
    AmandaB -

    “We can engage in all of that…”

    Did you just proposition the whole internet?

    Closet Metro: After reading all these posts, THAT is the one that made me laugh out loud.

    (there is probably someone in our IT department right now wondering why in the hell i’m clicking on colon cleansing ads… heh, or not wondering… what do I know?)

  • http://dirtyfloorsandfilthyjokes.blogspot.com/ closet metro

    Bucky, you were Ass-Talking four hours ago. You’re so patient!

  • http://krissypants.blogspot.com krissy pants

    Wait…we’re talking out of our asses now?

  • http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily_photo/01_05_2005.html Circus Kelli

    krissy pants: what do you mean NOW?

  • http://someadventure.blogspot.com/ Girl.A

    pfffffffffffffft.

  • http://dirtyfloorsandfilthyjokes.blogspot.com/ closet metro

    Circus – Ya got me back. Gigglefest in metroland.

  • http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily_photo/01_05_2005.html Circus Kelli

    Girl.A: did you just fart?
    Was it the iguana you had for lunch?

  • http://www.veryzen.blogspot.com Amanda B.

    Well it was sort of a collective “we”. But no, because I’m sure there are many out there who would be into the cucumber-squash idea.

    Only my husband gets that treatment.

  • http://krissypants.blogspot.com krissy pants

    lucky man

  • http://thefathousewife.blogspot.com/ Mrs.Stray

    So my mom was telling me about how my dad had to get an enema, well 2 actually, because of some kidney stones or what not. Hell he is like 60 he gets his as spoked all the time, *But* he totally like lied to her like he only had to get HALF of one.
    Needless to say she made him administer two full ones.
    Aren’t you glad you know that now.

  • http://shiz.typepad.com/ Shiz

    Okay, up here at good ol reception someone asked for a man with the last name “Ng,” which I guess NO ONE knows how to pronounce. He said it like “UNNNGH” and it sounded like he was trying to do a Red Iguana himself.

  • http://sistersindance.blogspot.com/ Graygirl

    Please people…..not before lunch! I wa-a-a-as hungry until all of this colon/poop talk. Think I’ll just go shopping now!

  • http://someadventure.blogspot.com/ Girl.A

    I HATE it when it comes out looking like a red iguana. So pettable. So not pettable.

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    Girl.A, is “petting the iguana” a euphemism of some sort?

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    Hey, some people are horse whisperers. I’m an ass whisperer.

  • http://dirtyfloorsandfilthyjokes.blogspot.com/ closet metro

    Bucky – my ass shouts.

  • http://www.kempland4u.com Gooooder

    ass whisperer, aint right.

  • http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily_photo/01_05_2005.html Circus Kelli

    Closet: Sounds like a personal problem.

  • http://journals.aol.com/fkaren1964/ScatteredThoughts/ Fran

    Poop!!!!!

  • http://nowhere.com moose

    I think Fran just summed this up rather nicely. Thank you, Fran.

  • a reader

    Thank you so much for using your site to help the tsumani victims. Every little bit helps and this is going to go on for a long time.

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    The whole colon-cleansing links thing has sent me on an unholy quest today, where I find pro-colon-irrigation statements like:

    “Using an enema is like trying to wash your car with one glass of water. You’ll run out of water before you finish.”

    source: http://www.juicing.com/colon1.htm

  • Cristin

    *ick*

  • http://someadventure.blogspot.com/ Girl.A

    * L-ick *

    I like this game!
    Electric Company

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    Closet — okay, you got me. There is nothing whispery about my ass. In fact, my husband has often accused me of having a trumpet hidden. . .well, *you know where*

  • http://thefathousewife.blogspot.com/ Mrs.Stray

    How much water is required?

    Didn’t Ms. Monroe die during a drug induced enema?

    Ok, that made *me* giggle.

  • IT Department

    We see where you’re clicking. And we’re telling your managers. All of you get back to work.

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