Jones. He got in the way.

  • annabelle

    Do all ya’ll really drink bourbon. I swear I had no idea it was that popular- though dooce was sort of an original that way.

    I mean maybe my grandmother, but isn’t our generation more into wine and girly vodka drinks?

  • Peter Hentges

    Well, if you’re from Iowa, we make allowances. (I’m from Minnesota, you see.)

  • Peter Hentges

    ::chuckle:: Little too much wine there, Henryk? Can we quote #1069 out of context?

  • karinka

    seriously, dooce, if you sold t-shirts and buttons and crap like that, i’d be all over it like white on rice!

  • warcrygirl

    I’m with Wicked Fun; I refer to mine as a coochie. Hubby refers to it as “puddy”.

  • Annejelynn

    hey Peter, should we go for 900?
    we can switch off…(unfortunately, I’m NOT kidding)

  • Peter Hentges

    Otis would probably like this URL, Anne:

  • Trance

    I think you’re totally on, Victoria. I noticed that, too. “You’re ugly, and you suck,” is what it comes down to.

    Sooooo mature.

  • Circus Kelli

    Holy crap — Mallory grew up in Palatine, IL. Growing up, I lived about 20 minutes from there. Heh.

  • Peter Hentges

    What’s your excuse for being up, Ern?

  • diippi

    Since there were too many people in my cubicle.. I seeked out an isolated machine and bring up that too freaky ???

    *walks fast to catch up with the rest of the party*

    Hi Annej !

  • dewi

    If the nap is gone, you must hire a baby-sitter two or three times a week for a few hours. I am serious, find the money! A babysitter is for your mental health and a known remedy to keep you from getting overwhelmed or upping the medication into zombie hood. The “free time” gives you a little breather and perspective. Mothering full-time is the hardest job you will ever have and babysitters are a perk that comes with the job. Take advantage of this job benefit for you own sanity.

  • Katrina

    I tawt I saw a puddy tat

  • Annejelynn

    *ERN!* yer here!!! ya wanna join Peter and I on a 900 comments quest?

  • Henryk_ Fri@2051_Sydney time

    yes, Peter, poorly written! Disably assisted by a glass of the drop!

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    Personally I would have been happy not to have to read that crap all over again. But thats just me.

  • annabelle

    Katrina! Hah! I have to pass that on.

  • Peter Hentges

    I’m not into the whole number game. But if you keep chatting, I’ll keep responding. :)

  • Peter Hentges

    Sounds like you’re keeping yourself from being dooced, diippi. Sane enough.

  • Jessica Raab

    Comment #162 is THE BEST.

    I need my daily Oliver alongside of my daily Dooce— and today they totally crossed over from separate continents.

    What about Matt Damon? Last night I don’t know what I was dreaming, but I yelled at my husband: “WHY DOES IT COST $30?!?!”

    that is all.

  • moose

    Bourbon’s one of my faves.

    KBBAW: solo un poco. apprendo.

  • Annejelynn

    WE CAN DO IT! THE POWER OF THREE! Come on! Join me in my lunacy!

  • Annejelynn

    Peter – you are the new hero!

    what a kick ass site!

  • Mark Johnson

    Can’t stop thinking about the kind of swag that could be sold at Salt Lake Buzz games . . .

    “First 500 ticketholders through the gate receive a complimentary Taser M26 . . . buzz your favorite umpire!”

    “Why sing the national anthem when you can catch a seventh-inning buzz?”

  • Big Gay Sam

    Bucky Four-Eyes said at 01:35PM, 02.17.2005:
    BGSam — do you think Jesus ever passed Mary Magdelene a note that said:
    “I like you. Do you like me?
    Check: __yes ____no”


    Naw.. he just glowed in front of her and she was smitten.

    Closet Metro said at 01:36PM, 02.17.2005:
    Big Gay Sam – the bumper of your car, or your backside? (Just so I get the mental picture right)


    Come to my place and I’ll show you my etchings. ::wiggling eyebrows up and down::

  • Ern

    I’m on the west coast, so it’s only midnight.

    And I’m working on a paper that I put off until the night before it was due. As per my usual procrastinating self.

  • Henryk_ Fri@2051_Sydney time

    actually…it’s 2119 Sydney time

  • ashbetty

    My god. You are so right! What about Matt Damon?

  • Katrina

    WOOHOO #567!!!

  • Annejelynn

    Peter, so while you’re working the god-awful 3rd shift, do you thoroughly catch up on your proper dooce consumption?

  • Peter Hentges


    And here I thought you had finally dropped off to sleep, Anne.

  • victoria

    There’s a pattern in the troll comments that have appeared recently on

    First, the person attacks Heather’s appearance or sexual attractiveness:

    a. “no one wants to go muff diving on someone who hasnt’ taken a shower”

    b. “you’re just another skinny woman with no tits or ass”

    c. “I love to see a masculine looking woman trying to be all chic”

    Second, the person (it HAS to be the same one) attacks Heather’s parenting:

    a. she has “potty mouth”

    b. her post-partum depression will lead her to kill all her kids

    c. she’s ignoring the fact that her child is autistic.

    What my fellow doocelings don’t pick up on is that these childish attacks on Heather’s considerable beauty are ALWAYS paired with self-avowed “serious,” high-minded parenting “advice” (that is really just intended to make Heather feel bad).

    Doocelings typically just react to the hypocritical attacks disguised as parenting advice — apparently not noticing that this insane, delusional commenter can’t stop herself from saying, despite all the photographic evidence to the contrary, that Heather is unattractive.

    What’s going on is obvious: this poster can’t bear the fact that Heather is young, thin, gorgeous, talented, adored by many doocelings AND her husband and beautiful baby. So she posts these ridiculous “you’re ugly and a bad mother” comments.

    To me, the “you’re ugly” statements that are inevitably included in this person’s comments (she seems to have some sort of compulsion on this subject) simply show that she has completely lost touch with reality. The commenter discredits her “advice” by always pairing it with these infantile attacks.

    Am I right?

  • Katrina

    ooops, I lied.

  • Annejelynn

    Are you a daily dooceling, Peter?

  • Annejelynn

    well, maybe ‘kick ass’ sounds too harsh there, but anyhow, I think Otis is soooooo befuddled right now and overwhelmed, he doesn’t know what to do -and having cut back to dooce here, I still can’t see the screen now because he won’t back down (he’s up on his hind legs) from the monitor

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    Tell me you got that on tape!!!

    Personally I think Matt Damon looks a bit boyish. I want a man baby. Although, he does have nice pecs. Hmmmm.

  • http://james jp

    whoopsie daisy
    and my all time fav down there.

  • Ern

    Actually, my lunacy is about to fall asleep. But I will probably be up early enough to post on this daily pic before Dooce posts a new one!

  • diippi

    So..where are we off to ??

  • ashik

    I wonder what the Mormon Authority thinks about Matt Damon…. What about UPPERCASE GOD? I bet he is proud that he made Matt Damon so purty … wait, if Matt Damon was made in him image, DOES THAT MEAN THAT UPPERCASE GOD LOOKS LIKE MATT DAMON?

  • Katie-be-bored-at-work

    My written Spanish is better than my spoken Spanish. My accent is okay, but when waitresses at Mexican restaurants ask me a question in Spanish, I get all red-faced and stutter out something in English. Then they go in the kitchen with the other senoritas and laugh about the stupid white girl. Oh, the paranoia I have here in Texas.

  • Peter Hentges

    Ahh, procrastination, the mother of … something, I’m sure.

    Go, AJ, with the Charmed reference….

  • Peter Hentges

    Haha! Otis sounds terribly cute. Sorry if he’s getting in the way of your dooce fix, though.

  • Squish

    Sorry to dredge up yesterday’s news, but I just woke up from a long winter’s nap.

  • Liggett

    Hey Dooce,

    Here’s where you can get some up-to-date real world and road rules information:

  • Annejelynn


    (please apply the Rod Steward tune of ‘Infatuation’)

  • Henryk_ Fri@2122_Sydney time

    Yes Pete…..a cool site

  • Katie-be-bored-at-work

    Striz, I love those skits on SNL, too. I love how they are always saying everything is “wicked”. My family is from Connecticut and everything was always “wicked cool” and “wicked ugly”. I think wicked is the New England version of “very”. I think Matt Damon is wicked hot!

  • stacey

    that mallory chick is from my neck of the woods. she lives about 3 miles from me, lol. she went to high school in my district.

  • Annejelynn


    (please apply the Rod Steward tune of ‘Infatuation’)