To Grandmother’s house we go

  • Katie-be-happy-at-home

    Doocekateer. I wanna be Annette Funicello. She was the Mouseketeer with the big boobs.

  • heidillydoo

    Spoonleg – just checked out your blog – hilarious! Plus, you’re a 23 year old RN – me too! (In April I will be, anyway).

  • heidillydoo

    That is, in April I will be an RN. In March, I will be 24. Whip-de-frickin’doo I know.

  • Katie-be-happy-at-home

    Cum soaked barn sluts. Striz, you have such a way with words. Count me in as a barn slut.

    But what is wrong with the term Dooceling. In the words of a certain ass troll from Thursday, does calling ourselves Doocelings make us sycophants? I like the word Dooceling.

  • shelly

    tards, or barn sluts, soaked or not, are SO MUCH BETTER. thanks.

  • Althea

    Alan, thank you so much for not starting off the comments with the ever so clever question, “FIRST?”

  • kelly

    “Dooce: Home of the dorks, e-tards, and cum-soaked barn sluts since 2001″


  • heidillydoo

    I prefer e-tards – has a cute twang to it.

  • spoonleg

    I can think of no better nickname for dooce’s minions that cum soaked barn sluts. count me in!

    btw, I also dispise the term doocelings. It reminds me of goose/gosling or something. Maybe I’m just a ‘tard. Or as my old college roommate used to call me, a Re. That’s right, just re- (sans ‘tard).

  • Lauren Stranahan

    Yes, Bellychaser!

    I love that line.I always catch myself singing it to my 3 year old. I have got to stop that, I think. God, I love words.

  • Bellychaser

    Evan Dando. Yum. (mind wandering, impure thoughts) Where is that husband of mine when i need him?

  • the niffer

    Green Day IS coming to little ol’ London. It’s crazy – we’ve had some big names since building a big arena — Jane’s Addiction, David Bowie, Yanni…

    Since I won’t be a shit ass ho motherfucker anytime soon, I vote for cum-soaked barn sluts.

  • kalki

    I’m with the niffer.

    “Dooce: Safe haven for dorks, doocelings, and e-tards since 2001″

  • Lauren Stranahan

    Gawd, that’s SO last year, Mrs.S …

    How about .. Salad Tossers?


  • Bellychaser

    ooh,the Lemonheads! Haven’t listened to them in a while! …”I don’t need you to suck my dick or to help me feel good about myself. Big gay heart, please don’t break my big gay heart…” My most listened to album of 1994. That and Matthew Sweet. Oh, and Sloan. Ah, memories.

  • heidillydoo

    How about Dooceburgers?

  • shelly

    Somebody PLEASE come up with a better name, if there really needs to be a name, than f’in Doocelings! Makes me a Pukeling.

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    How about cum soaked barn sluts?

  • heidillydoo

    Greenday’s coming to London in May?! WTF – there’s nothing about it on their web site. Are they coming to Toronto any time soon?

  • the niffer

    Tex — It pains me to beat a dead horse (esp. since I’m vegetarian) but David didn’t say the photo wasn’t as good as they usually are, he basically said they always suck.

    David has a right to say what he wants. What I don’t get, and it’s been said much better by tonnes of people before me, is: why the fuck do people visit this site regularly and then comment how shitty they think it is? They need to find somewhere else to play and let those of us who like Dooce’s photos and Dooce’s stories and the stories of Doocelings enjoy it in peace. I think we all deal with enough negativity out in the real world all day, every day, to have to deal with it here too.

    I apologize, Dooce, for the rant and eating up your bandwidth. But Green Day is coming to London in May and they sold out in 10 sec. so I’m in a really pissy mood.

  • Elle OH

    Y’all, I am e-tarded!

  • heidillydoo

    Imagine that – that one’s not on iTunes either. :-S

  • spoonleg

    I have PS 8 and can barely navigate through the thing. There are just too many functions! I’d love to take a class on how to enhance/correct digital photographs using PS8, but I don’t know where/how to find such a class. Like at a local college? I am so technologically DORK-TARDED. I need help.

  • heidillydoo

    It’s a great song, so sweet.
    I will check out Rhapsody. emusic has a free trial – I might try that.

  • Lauren Stranahan

    The song I have been listening to endlessly the last couple of days is Big Gay Heart by The Lemonheads. It’s a sweet song, too.


  • Lauren Stranahan

    One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Barbie Dolls, Heidillydoo …

    I used to love iTunes, but right now I’ve really been enjoying Rhapsody. For $10 a month you can download all the music you want.

    Now… back to watching Grease.


  • heidillydoo

    Lauren – Pizzicato Five’s not on Canadian iTunes! I put in a request. I love the song, “Baby Love Child.” My hubby and I heard it on Futurama. Do you have any suggestions? I suppose I could look for a ‘real’ album at the store…

  • Bucky Four-Eyes

    Thanks, Lauren, I shall investigate. My PS skills are limited, and I’d like to change that.

    I don’t know if it’s for good or evil, but we’ll deal with that when the time comes. . .

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    Yeath Cathi, scared me.

  • Spurious Plum

    This picture’s so pretty! Are stoplights blue?

    What the hell does one DO at a blue traffic light? Drink? Fondle oneself? Is it the light of vice?

    Because I really want it to be.

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    RE: 38…Dooce is the verb maaan

  • Lauren Stranahan

    I didn’t look on iTunes. Rhapsody has a bunch of their music, including Baby Love Child.

    I’m listening to it right now. Thanks! I love finding new songs.

  • cathi

    Yes, yesterday was the longest work day ever. Thanks, Dooce, for giving an assignment to preoccupy us.

    I’m finding mine a little creepy, but I have to blame that on my choice of pics.

  • bean

    #195. HA! WITH RELISH!! perhaps my all time favourite line. rizzo: quelle badass.

    the great comment debate is cracking me up. there are a lot of class presidents out there.

    to further yesterday’s conversation re: chocolate. just tried the Turtles egg today. Nestle sucks anyway but guys—Turtles are turtles, not eggs. don’t do it. if you must, eat a turtle…

    and finally, to comment on the pic. it’s amazing isn’t it? this little world we’re on? we got the exact same sky today. there must have been extra stock.

  • Observer

    Yes, you may correct *my* spelling of the ‘word’ *word*!


  • heidillydoo

    Has anyone heard of Pizzicato Five?

  • Em


  • Lauren Stranahan

    BFE – you could probably cheat and use a different blend mode and change the opacity settings.

    I’m using 7.0, not CS and I have the Linear Light blend mode, fyi..

    Or REALLY cheat and download the 30 day trial.


  • RazDreams

    (and the word *definitly*, most definitely!) ;-)

  • part-timer

    Oh, Niffer. We all miss Uppercase GOD. But, alas, he is doing God’s work – you know… family, kids… etc. Are there trolls here tonight? Haven’t read yet…..

  • Lauren Stranahan

    I like the photo, fine .. it isn’t Chuck, but then what is?

  • part-timer

    Mrs. S – boot camp. military-type ass kicking outside-get-your-ass-all-dirty-and-sweaty-work out. But seeing as you’re in Cuse, may have to wait for the Spring. If’n you have other ques. let me know.

  • Mrs.Strizzay

    lucy in the sky with diamonds

  • Scarah

    i <3 you, TexaRican.

  • Lauren Stranahan

    Gooooder(#35), is that what happened?! I just thought Dooce was fucking with us..

    I look forward to Chuck Friday all week long. And yesterday he looked so friggin’ sweet it made me crazy (um .. well, something else might have made me crazy, but I digress..)to not be able to profess my love for him.

    Do you think Chuck reads the comments?

  • Bucky Four-Eyes

    Aaaaaah comments, sweet sweet comments. Gotta say: Chuck yesterday? My cold, dead heart melted for the sleepwalkin’ doggie.

    Tried the Dork Effect in PS 6.0.1, but was missing the option “LINEAR LIGHT” in blend mode (step 5). May have to investigate PS CS. Or is it because I’m on a Windows box?

    Huh huh. “Box” There’s a window in my box. Huh huh huh

  • Another Heather

    Doocy is now an adjective. Great shot by the way. :-) Ahhhh… gotta get my morning dooce report while drinking coffee. Thanks.

  • Henryk_

    I am so tired, my eyes are crossing. I need a nap and its almost Sunday – noon!

  • Observer

    Hi Heather,

    may I correct your spelling of the work ‘Schnapps’?
    Actually it is just ‘Schnaps’ since this is definitly a German word.



    Never mind, I just wanted to be a smart a**.

  • TexaRican

    1. David did not state HIS pics were better…merely noted the quality wasn’t as good as usual. I think as a fellow blogger and photographer he is entitled to his opinion and/or curiosity about the difference.

    2. Even if he was being a dick…Heather is a big girl, mucho strong. She is MORE than capable of defending HERSELF, if she feels someone is giving her shit.

    3. For those of you “hostile doocelings” (you know, the ones I have noticed via lurkage who LOVE to pounce on the asses of newbies/anyone who appears to be critical of the Armstrongs), I’m sure my “Suck it!” is on the way. So here’s my preemptive response, in the words of the immortal Rizzo: “WITH RELISH!”