He loves her, he really does

This one, taken by Jon.

  • Annabellle

    do you think more mormons read this blog because of dooce being an ex-mormon or something? it seems like there are a disproportionally high amount of mormons on here. Wow, when you write disproportionally it looks really long- is that right? should it be disproportionately?

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Boy do I know how to clear a room.

  • http://blog.mrtland.com mrtl

    Thanks, Greenie. I’m finding this discussion fascinating! The religion I was raised with just had us doing a frenetic pattern of sitting, kneeling and standing while listening to lecture after lecture. We didn’t get to wear or do anything cool – no garments, no yarmulkes, so dancing in the aisles or waving the arms or laying on of hands. Maybe this would have made a difference to me. pshaw

  • Annabelle

    Names in the following piece of correspondence have been changed to protect corresponders’ identities. But does my little sister lead a charmed life, or what? BTW, she wrote this to me FROM Rome.


    its sooo nice out, i have to poo, i have to study italiano, i have to draw, then i have to drink bc tomorrow im 21, then i have to go to art class, then take an italian quiz, then fly to paris, then arrive in paris and party!!!!!!!!!!!

    ilove u i love u i love u


  • http://harlowandtheboys.blogspot.com/ greenthumb

    Hola chica bonita! Good Friday to you too. mwah!

  • http://www.snickrsnack.blogspot.com Katie-be-bored-at-work

    Did Dr. Poke treat you well, Torrie?

  • Cate

    Secret handshakes? I would say no. It may be a reference to something in the temple ceremony, which I’ve never taken part of and is chock full of symbolism.

    Modest prom dresses? Not specifically for garments, as garments aren’t worn until taking part of the temple ceremony – generally before going on a mission at age 19 or 21 or getting married. Mormons in general are taught to be modest in dress and appearance – spaghetti straps, sleeveless stuff, short shorts, bikinis and other revealing apparel that is standard fare for most everyone else is supposed to be out of the question, whether you wear garments or not.

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Katie, my ovaries are a little sore.

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie


  • http://bibaciousbabe.blogspot.com/ Vaida

    Fuck bees! I’ll punch every bee in the face!

  • http://www.snickrsnack.blogspot.com Katie-be-bored-at-work

    Muffy, that is hilarious. I like the Bellowing Butthole, but I think the name you like might be a little more marketable. And you’re right, everybody poops and we all could use a heated toilet seats, so I think it would be a hit.

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Vaida, do you know this one?

    A TIRE hit her in the face!

    What was she doing putting her face near tires?

  • Annabellle

    Muffy, in my opinion, it sounds way too niche.

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Do I smell bad?

  • naralius

    lol… muffy… you really need to get your own blog, you made me laugh crazy woman!, and about your man/fiance/boyfriend/hubby to be. just keep calling him what you always have. changing the title or name, just weeks before the wedding is not a good idea.

  • Annabelle

    Vaida, is that from a movie? The “F Bees” line? It sounds like something Napoleon Dynamite would have said except he didn’t curse.

  • http://harlowandtheboys.blogspot.com/ greenthumb

    Spot On Cate

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Annabelle, it’s a routine from comedian Dane Cook.

  • beastly

    Regarding your Mancunian post, that’s all word for word according to the Gospel of Dooce. “Right on” and “Amen”.


    Well, I’m not really a DOCTOR.

  • http://papertiger12.tripod.com/ Jen in Boston

    Muffy, while it’s true that everyone must “eliminate”, most people don’t want to even admit to it not to mention GLORIFY the process by purchasing pooping paraphernalia. I don’t mean to burst your non-bubblebath seling bubble, but I say you need to tweak the idea to include other items. HOWEVER – the “Best Seat in the House” title is very, very clever. (Way better than the Bellowing Butthole. Ewww!)

  • http://www.dadgonemad.com Dr. Johnny Fever

    Is Leta available for rental? I’d like to take her home and kiss those cute cheeks for an hour or so.

  • http://sittingthisoneout.com A regular commenter who does not wish to be stoned

    Annabellle said at 08:45AM, 04.08.2005:
    Can someone please explain why sometimes the posts are shut down?

    As greenthumb said, Heather controls whether the comments are up or down, and has not said specifically _why_ she shuts them down, when she does. There are a few prevailing theories, though:

    1. When trolls come a-calling, some of the newer doocelings refuse to ignore them, and instead engage in such juvenile behaviour as name-calling and arguing back and forth with them, until things get totally out of hand and really, really, hateful, which usually ends in the comments being shut down for the day (or longer).

    2. If anyone comments with a dissenting opinion, even if it’s done in a respectable manner, these same “new regulars” form a gang and verbally beat the living hell out of the nonconformist, forgetting that (a) this is NOT their site, and (b) everyone here is entitled to their own opinion.

    3. The total and complete monopolization of the comments by one or two people, who spend much of the day doing #1 and #2 above.

    (I’m leaving my name off this one, fearing the stonings that tend to take place these days when anyone speaks up about this stuff.)

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Pokey, YOU’RE NOT???????????

  • Muffy

    BTW, I feel badly that I don’t have a blog and feel like such a leech coming on here, and giving no one a way to contact me and call me a bitch or whatever (I’m used to the hate, I had a personal ad up for 4 years. The stories I could tell). So, I don’t know the etiquette on this, so I’m just gonna throw it out there.
    My email address is bringbackmagic@aol.com
    I also have a profile on there and some pictures (Please disregard the homepage info – can’t figure out how to change it)
    I just don’t anyone to think I’m this anonymous link to doocearchives type of person.
    That, and i need some new email. All the fun stuff dried up since my personal ad got snipped from AOL. Love to all!

  • Annabelle

    Ahaaaa! Dane Cook. I Shall check him out.

  • http://blog.mrtland.com mrtl

    Cate – thank you for the clarification. I really should talk more about this with my Mormon friend.

  • part-timer

    That’s a beautiful post. It is so nice to look at where you are and what you’re doing and just be. And be happy.

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Ben Affleck

    Where my bitches at?

  • http://chaithere.blogspot.com AndreaBT

    I heart Dory! Ellen DeGeneres got all the best lines in that movie. My favorite: when Marlin and Dory manage to wrap the mask around the lanternfish’s(?) mouth and say, “We did it, we did it, oh yeah yeah yeah…No eating here tonight, woo! No eating here tonight, NO NO NO eating here tonight, you on a diet!”

    OK, so she shared most of that with Marlin, but had the best, the last part, all to herself.

    Hello, my name is Andrea, and I get my kicks from reciting the words to movies (especially ever-so-annoyingly WHILE THE MOVIE IS PLAYING)

  • http://spuriousplum.blogspot.com/ Spurious Plum

    To add to the Mormon hullabaloo:

    I’ve had several Mormon friends get married in our local temple. But I never get to SEE the service because as a non-Mormon, I’m not allowed inside the temple proper. There’s always a reception on the church grounds, where eveyone shakes hands, eats cake and exchanges gifts, but I miss celebrating the actual event with my friends.

    I know I’m a total heathen, but why can’t I watch my friends get married? Has this happened to anyone else?

  • part-timer

    Oh, I just read some comments starting from the bottom… “vagina poked” – hahahhahaha!!!

  • http://www.danikabur.blogspot.com Danika

    I am so jealous of you Dooce and happy for you.. for having/doing exactly what you enjoy doing!!

    Muffy ~ I agree with Jen in Boston. You need to include other items and the best seat in the house is the better name.

  • ishouldbeworking

    I think Chuck’s saying “if you just push on the door we could make a run for it…”

    I must say, you have all given me an education today in the Mormon world…

    Vaida-I like your name! It reminds me of my grandma’s – Vida. She was the “cool grandma” while I was growing up…

    Happy Chuck & Leta Friday everybody!!!

  • Down with the hate

    Dissenting opinions are one thing. Being nasty is quite another. And some of the comments I saw the other day, directed at one or two individuals, were not that of a dissenting opinion. They were out of spite and nastiness. I don’t like seeing someone get beaten down for their beliefs, but they DO deserve to get an ass kicking when they say mean and hurtful things towards other posters. That’s my two cents. And I’m leaving my name off too.

  • http://reformedstrippersanon.blogspot.com JessicaRabbit

    Ahh Im awake. Whats up people? Im having the best morning ever.

  • http://blog.mrtland.com mrtl

    A regular – I wondered (regarding yesterday) if the convo the other day was a little too much… or am I just too much of a prude? :: oh now I’m blushing ::

    You young ones today can just talk about anything. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, and I can always sit out.

  • Annabelle

    Wow Andrea- I should get you and the sisters together. You guys would love each other.

    Besides all the FABulous Dori lines, my favorite part is when the little turtle is functioning as the flight attendant and he’s so freakin’ adorable, but Marlin just stares at him blankly and then says to Dori something like, “He’s speaking to me. I’m sure of it.” And then to the little turtle dude, “You’re really cute. But I have no idea what you just said!”

  • http://www.ericshawn.com/images/matt_damon.jpg Matt Damon

    Right here, Ben….

  • curious

    Not sure if the wise ones are still around, but I have just one more itty bitty Mormon question…

    What is the Mormon view on circumcision?

  • http://www.snickrsnack.blogspot.com Katie-be-bored-at-work

    It is odd that Mormons don’t let non-Mormons into their wedding ceremonies. I think that is sort of making outcasts of anyone who hasn’t “seen the light” and become a Mormon. Is there something at those wedding ceremonies they don’t want us to see?

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    “Morning” Jess! I’m just about to leave work.
    What kind of fucked-up world is this?

  • Katietoyboy

    Muffy – how about ‘The Throne Room’ ????

  • http://www.iprettymuchhateeverything.blogspot.com Torrie

    Jessica, how’s the kitty?

  • Annabellle

    I completely agree with Jen in Boston- and though I also agree that “The best seat in the house” is also very clever, I don’t think people want to shop in a store that has a kind of funny potty theme- I’d go high end bath store with all the frou-frouness you can muster. I don’t think you’d last otherwise. But then again, I live in a frou-frou town and am surrounded by other frou-frou towns, so people would be into that.

  • http://harlowandtheboys.blogspot.com/ greenthumb

    circumcision plays no part in the doctorin of the church.

  • http://ellabellababycakes.modblog.com ella’s ma

    It’s like Chuck is whispering, “I’ll get the door, you just make a run for it.”

  • http://harlowandtheboys.blogspot.com/ greenthumb

    that’s doctorine with and ‘e’ by the way…sheesh…lunch time coma setting in.

  • http://randomandodd.blogspot.com kristine

    My old roommate couldn’t see his son be baptised because he was…uh, what’s the word for it? uh…well, he was ‘kicked out’ of the church for his evil ways.

    His brother ended up having to do it and my roommate couldn’t even go.

    Is that normal?

  • http://bucky4eyes.blogspot.com Bucky Four-Eyes

    Well, all you slap happy people, I’m takin’ my big butt home. Y’all say a little prayer for my home internet connection!

    Pokey: in the gyn office? you’re usin’ the stirrups completely wrong.