This is alls I got to say:

1) Y’all Canadians is NAAAAHHHCE. I have never in my life met a nicer group of people. People were nice to us EVERYWHERE, always talking and asking us if we were having a good time. This totally beats out the South when it comes to nice because in the South people are nice to you ’cause they know they mama is gonna beat them back home if they ain’t. In Vancouver people were nice because THAT’S WHO THEY ARE. Except, they don’t have Super Target or TiVo.

That’s not a joke. You can’t pause live television in Canada.

Plans to relocate to Vancouver: TEMPORARILY DELAYED.

2) Lots of y’all wrote to tell me that y’all don’t talk like that, meaning: aboot! and oot!

Here’s the truth: YOU ALL DO. Stop the denial. I heard ABOOT more than a hundred times and then I lost count. It’s not annoying, in fact, I loved it. It made me want to package you all into little morsels and claim you on my customs form while going through the airport.

3) I was so worried that during my panel I was going to be the gross one, what with CROTCH and WOLF DICK written on the wall behind me, BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Oh, no. Our lovely British friend, Ross, had me OUT DONE, with a capital D O N E. He showed a reel wherein he had produced an interactive video of a woman masturbating, and you could participate by rubbing your mouse, like a cock, against the monitor. Um, JON AND I NEED TO GET OUT OF UTAH MORE OFTEN.

We had the most amazing time in Vancouver. We were totally blown away. I can’t even begin to describe how exciting and breathtaking the city is. Truly one of the world’s gems.

Here is a slideshow of our adventure. Click on the picture below: