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When paperweights explode

Jon often wakes up in the morning before I do, before the alarm in the other room starts singing her ABC’s, and he’ll read blogs and news stories on his laptop to pass the time quietly. Yesterday morning when I finally woke up, my new haircut sticking straight up like Chuck’s ears when I mouth [...]

“Oh look at the trees and look at my face and look at a place far away from here”

The great and dreadful day of the Lord

Yesterday while standing in line at the grocery store I noticed that the Deseret Book display — Deseret Book is a Mormon book publisher — had some new titles in, including this delightful guide for teenagers: Like, I totally can’t wait for the Second Coming! All those people who didn’t pay their tithing are, like, [...]

The only one in this family who is okay with a snowstorm in April

The little bit we can talk about

A few months ago I mentioned that Jon and I were meeting with a lawyer about what we should do with the severed head we’d stored in our trunk. He said he legally couldn’t tell us what to do with it, but that whatever we decided would be fine, it’s his job to keep our [...]

Portrait of the artist as a young thumb-sucker

Photo credit goes to her father.

Even I can’t believe I’m allowed to have a dog

One late evening last October Jon and I finished the last few scoops of a carton of Cookies ‘N Cream ice cream. Chuck was practicing Opus Dei rituals in the basement when he heard us walking toward the freezer in the kitchen and before we knew it he had drooled a path up the stairs. [...]

04 05 06

Newsletter: Month Twenty-six

Dear Leta, Yesterday you turned twenty-six months old. I would characterize the last month of your life as That One Time You Refused To Eat Anything, with [One Time] being a variable X where X = [Every Single Day]. We have come to realize that food is an area in your life where you are [...]

Every bit an Armstrong