Three, two, one…

There was this one time when I asked a whole bunch of people if they would help me put together a book, some of them close friends, others whose work I had admired for years, and I remember one exchange in particular when this one guy said SURE! and the excitement I experienced was not unlike what I imagine it would feel like to impregnate Angelina Jolie myself.

That book comes out today:

the book

It’s called Things I Learned About My Dad (in therapy) and it’s a collection of essays about fatherhood from the perspective of fathers, wives, daughters and sons. I’ve written two of the 17 essays, one about my father and one about Jon. A few weeks ago I gave my father an advance copy of the book with the hope that he would read what I had written, but I didn’t say anything to him other than HERE IS MY HEART AND SOUL, DO WITH IT WHAT YOU WILL. I found out a week later that he had taken it home and used it to prop up a wobbly toilet. I like to think that I improved his life by those two inches.

The other authors are Kevin Guilfoile, Matthew Baldwin, Matt LaPlante, Alice Bradley, Doug French, James Griffioen, Greg Allen, Greg Knauss, Maggie Mason, my hot geek husband Jon Armstrong, Leah Peterson, Sarah Brown, Eden Kennedy, Gail Armstrong, and my man in Houston, Bill Farrell. I am eternally indebted to these people for their hard work and cooperation and for making this book such a spectacular collection of emotion: humor, sorrow, frustration, joy, and forgiveness. I won’t say which, but one of these essays completely transformed me, and I’m a better person for having read it.

Starting today the book is available at the following retailers:

Barnes and Noble
Kensington Books

On Thursday June 5 I’m going to be doing a signing at a local bookstore called The King’s English on 15th East in Salt Lake City. I’ll be sure to post more specific details as that date draws near and would encourage everyone to come and say hello even if you don’t want to bother with the book. I haven’t ever done a local meet and greet and thought this would be the perfect occasion. But be warned, I am known to bite. And suddenly break out into song.

I don’t think the publisher is sending me anywhere to do press or signings, but I’ve had a few requests from readers who wanted to know if they could send me their copy so that I could sign it and then send it back to them. I’m more than happy to do this as long as you include return postage (please send it to the address on my contact page), and what the hell, I’ll tuck a little extra something into the envelope. I promise it won’t be gross. Maybe.

Finally, I want to thank my editor Danielle Chiotti whose name should be right next to mine on the cover of the book given how much work she did to get this thing out the door. She is a superhero, and I can’t thank her enough for hanging in there with me. Also, my agent Betsy Lerner, who has been my tireless advocate for over three years. She has suffered endlessly, and I owe her a beer.


  • Lindsay

    Well done, you!! I can’t wait to buy a copy!

  • Diane

    Holy Moly Cow! You are a published author (outside of your wonderful blog that is!) and I look forward to reading your book.

    Congratulations – now go and put your feet up and have a drink – you deserve it!

  • Sheryl Stephen

    Congratulations, and best wishes always.

  • Craftwhack

    I can’t wait to read your book! Ya-hoo.

  • TiffaneyC

    Congrats!! Longtime lurker here, I just ordered a copy and I am thrilled. Kudos to you, your family, and all those involved. Be proud…you deserve it. <3

  • Salena Lettera

    I pre-ordered my copy when you first spoke about this book and I got an e-mail from Amazon telling me it’s on its way. I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited! I can’t wait to get my hot little hands on it.

    Since I drive an 18-wheeler for a living, I do everything in my power to be in SLC on June 5 to see you and anywhere else in the country you might be going to speak/promote your book.

    Best of luck to you and your amazing (how can it not be) book!!!

    (proof of human visitor words: stowe boring)

  • Kim

    AGGGGHH. I have been waiting for this day since you mentioned you were writing a book. I just got my copy, and I’m so busy at work, I might have to work overtime. Dammit, don’t they know I need to read Dooce’s new book??

  • Toni

    wow. this is !@#$&* AWESOME. sweet & shiny! congratulations H.B.

  • MontanaJen

    ::Pats dooce on the back and hands her a special margarita on the rocks::

  • Anonymous

    i would just like to say congrats on the book! and that east coast b&ns suck…. they wont have the book in until mid may…

  • Cathy

    Just ordered a copy. I hope it sells like gangbusters. Congrats!

  • Anonymous

    I pre-ordered from Amazon and I can’t wait til Friday!

  • Patti

    I have my copy to take on vacation . . . when I get back I’m mailing it for that autograph.


  • Dana

    Yay! I can’t wait to pick up a copy, and have it signed!

  • Brandi Koskie

    What an amazing accomplishment!! Congratulations. I hope it flies!

    Plan on signing mine, too! ;)

  • Chris Verstraete

    Excellent! Congrats on your new book! Nothing like it. All the pain and anguish finally comes to fruition. I’m on pins and needles, too, my novel, Searching For A Starry Night, A Miniature Art Mystery, (tweens to teens) comes out next month! (And check out the actual miniature of Van Gogh’s Starry Night at my blog – – cool huh?

  • Jennifer

    And it’s okay if you put something gross in the envelope. Maybe I’ll send you something extra too

  • Meadowlarkmark

    Congratulations!!!Great work. I a am proud of you though I only know you through the log.

  • Anne

    Congrats! Can’t wait to read it – ordering it as I type, well not really, but in just about 15 seconds…!

  • Jennifer Robin

    Can’t wait to read it! Maybe I learn a thing or two about my dad…

  • Lisa

    Congrats! Mine copy should be on it’s way from Amazon today………I’m so looking forward to reading it ;)

  • M.K.

    The best way, as a publishing professional, that I can think of to support your endeavor is by buying a copy. I’m headed to the Powell site right now! Congratulations!

  • Lori

    Maybe your publisher doesn’t think you need a press tour because you have such an internet following (and I did just buy your book online) but OMG – if you ever came to LA I would totally show up and buy another copy just to have you sign it.

  • Johanna

    Ordered my copy from amazon yesterday! This will be a great read, I am so proud of you and all those that helped you accomplish this task.

  • Kate

    Congratulations. What an amazing accomplishment! Go litle book!

  • Glenda J

    Mine is coming in the mail and I am so excited I am squeeling already–grin! I hope to get it out to you to sign, after I’ve read it. Love your blog.

  • Vicki

    Ordered mine today. Can’t wait!! Congrats on another big accomplishment!

  • Undercover Mutha

    If I lived closer to you, I would come and have you sign my chest at the signing. I’m sure it’s been mentioned or asked before…what with 337 comments already, but mine are the biggest. Bigger than Brit’s by a mile.

  • natalie

    Congratulations! And please come to DC for a signing! My husband’s from Bartlett and will love it that you’ve got a book out. Father’s Day present for him!

  • Boomer

    My copy is on it’s way from Amazon. I can’t wait to read it! I’ve been reading your blog since the beginning.

  • Kristan

    Heather, no worries. With your fan base, this book isn’t just gonna fly. It’s gonna freaking ORBIT!

    NASA could take some lessons. :P

    Congratulations! I look forward to getting my grubby hands on it and cradling it like a newborn infant while my boyfriend disowns me and takes the dog reading it.

  • Vivianne

    It’s great, congratulations. I’ve been reading since forever and I’m thinking of buying a copy and mailing to you to get it signed, if it wouldn’t be so much trouble!

  • UncommonBlonde

    Fly it will! Congrats. My copy is about to fly right across the country so you can sign it. Yipee!

  • Jill P.

    Thanks to the crappy ass little town I live in I am still sitting here waiting for Amazon to bring me my own sweet little copy. I am sooo anxious. Can’t wait to give my dad his copy for Father’s Day too. Thanks for this Dooce. Your hard work will pay off. It always does.

  • Lauren

    I am so excited about this! I pre-ordered a copy from Amazon, and am SO EXCITED to send it to my bad for Father’s Day.

    I do hope you’ll come to DC for a book signing. I would TOTALLY come to buy another book…maybe for my stepdad! :)

  • Becca

    I pre-ordered it but apparently so did a whole bunch of other people because O got a message this morning telling me it would get here between 05/07/2008 – 05/14/2008. How will I wait????

  • Marcy- The Glamorous Life

    How exciting for you! I can’t wait to read it…

  • Lisa

    three years….one beer? Very Funny!

  • T

    I’m sending you a virtual chocolatini. Enjoy your great success!

  • ALF

    Congratulations, Heather! I will put this on my list of books to read and I will continue running around telling people that “I want to be dooce when I grow up”.

  • Isabel Kallman


  • Emily

    A book signing? Wow… it makes you sound so celebrity. Congratulations, Heather!

    P.S. I’m sure your dad read the book while he was on the toilet before assigning it to prop duty.

  • Ann

    Congratulations! I’ll be buying it today! The title alone, I’m sure, speaks to many of us. Now, how ’bout one about the Moms?
    Looking forward to watching it climb the bestsellers list.

  • Danielle

    Congrats to you all! I just ordered one. You’re probably going to need a mailbox the size of a large garbage can to hold all the requests for autographs.


  • Ray

    Congratulations Dooce! I can’t wait to run out to Borders and overpay for it! Seriously, like many others, I have been waiting for the release of your book.

    And, if I send the book to you to have it signed, please do not send me any Polly Pockets stuff, or I will be forced to send you Thomas the Tank engine moisy toys. And, definitely don’t send Jon’s clogs.

  • Della

    Will your book be available from your own website? Would like to purchase directly if it is.

  • Nicole

    Heather, I’m so proud of you! Think back on how far you’ve come and how much you’ve accomplished . . . my goodness!

    It’s been 6? 7? years since I emailed you asking for help on how to make one of those photo galleries you used to do. and I miss all the old posts you took down! I still can’t drive behind a mitsubishi without thinking “how about some blinker action, mitsubishi motherfucker”. And I hope you remember that, it was a former ‘currently thinking’.

    What I’m getting at is this – you are affecting people’s lives, in such good ways, and you should truly let yourself enjoy every good minute of it.

  • Jill

    Congrats, Heather! I am doing the cabbage patch in your honor. I just ordered a copy via Amazon and can’t wait to read it!

  • Aliaspice

    Looks like at least 93 copies will sell!
    …am going to put in a request to purchase here at the library I work at…

  • Action Man

    Don’t wait around for your publisher to “send” you anywhere. Just like everyone, publishers are getting squeezed on money. If you want the book to sell, it sounds like you’re going to have to get out there and take the book to the public using your own Visa card and frequent flyer miles.

    I’m sure it’s embarrassing as heck to do, but you must do it–not for yourself–but to spread the Gospel of Dooce.