This tiny, delicate bird was a housewarming gift from Maggie, and I have no idea where she got it, somewhere in San Francisco, so that should narrow it down a little bit. I did a quick search for GLASS BIRD on etsy, and oh my god, look at this flask I found. If you were [...]
The instructions were: sit here and wait for breakfast. And things were going smoothly until Jon walked over, and because Coco had not seen him for all of 15 seconds she started flipping around at his feet like a giant wet fish. And Chuck is all, who are you again?
It’s snowing like crazy right now. And I am remaining perfectly calm about it. Calm enough to maybe play a quick game of hopscotch in traffic.
Leta has asked for a snack, so I reach up into a cabinet and grab some chips. Yes, chips. Filled with trans fat, high fructose corn syrup and butter. Sprinkled with tiny flakes of meth. Known to cause homicidal mania. Conveniently packaged in 100 calorie bags. When I rip open the top of the bag [...]