20 weeks
Turns out I'm feeling so much better! All it took was realizing just how beautiful it is to stand on the scale and discover that I've already gained seventeen pounds! I can't wait to shop for panties that have more square footage than a pool cover!
You must have a dooce® Community account to leave a comment.
If you've already registered, login.
If this is your first time posting here, snag a free account.
Heather talks about public tantrums (from kids) on today's Momversation.
- RIP Louis Mortimer Armstrong: http://bit.ly/1R4tv6
- Hugs and kisses to you, too! RT: @Monkey_Tree: @dooce he probably committed suicide because he was tired of LISTENING TO YOU WHINE.
- Our fish just died. And I'm sitting here crying. And it wasn't even my fault!
301. Angela said:
You are hilarious.
302. Mental Momma said:
But those big panties are soooooooo comfy. Kept mine waaay longer than I should have after babies were born.
303. Anonymous said:
These photos are in the same vain as that "I need your teeth for the federal reserve" video you posted a long time ago. Is it funny, or just plain creepy?
304. chrisubus said:
Congrats! And I love your insane expressions. Perfect for this time of pregnancy! It just gets better from here!
305. Lynn (Walking With Scissors) said:
You are the queen of sarcastic. Love those photos. Oh, and the whole 17 pound thing? Please. You'll probably be one of those women who goes home in her pre-maternity jeans.
306. Valerie Wininger said:
Dude, I can't find any extra pounds on you! You look awesome. And thank you for the laugh...you as a ballerina/princess crossover is priceless!!
307. rb said:
I can't believe you look so grumpy in all of your pregnancy photos.
(kidding.)
308. rb said:
Hey, the ad on my verification page was for a home stripper pole. Is that a coincidence?
309. Anne said:
BEST photos EVER!!! You are a pretty pretty pregnant princess!
310. kellie said:
LMFAO!! great photos!!
311. ModernGear TV Tamara said:
Ha! You made me spit out a mouthful of soup. And hang on here, that's what I look like and I am not even pregnant.
I guess there's one thing - you won't have your period for what, another 4 months?? Bonus.
312. The niffer said:
LOL
Let me guess - you got one too many emails about not smiling in your last belly shot.
This is fucking hilarious. You look beautiful.
313. Ray said:
I absolutely love your ensemble! =D Especially the tutu. I'm sure Leta loved your outfit. And you look great at five months! ;o)
314. protein powder said:
Strangely sexy.
315. Sam said:
Well, at least Leta's princess stuff is good for something.
Best of health to you.
316. Rochelle said:
Now thats more like it!!!
317. Jessica B. said:
SWEET LORD! There are some things a Disney Princess should NEVER DO.
I love it!
318. Naomi said:
Ok, I love you, awesome lady. Thanks for making my day!
319. Elaine said:
Cool. It's kind of Gwen Stefani-ish. I like it.
320. melissa said:
you are insane.
and i mean that in a really really incredibly good way.
LOVE.
321. Janet said:
Okay so I read you most every day. This is by far the most hilarious thing I have ever seen on your site. You are fearless girl. Well done.
322. Amy said:
I love these pictures - even though that's what I look like (not pregnant).
:) You are so cute!
323. Missives From Suburbia said:
DAMN! I wish I'd thought of maternity photos that fun! Too late. Game over for me. Awesomely demented photos. Perfect.
324. KathyM said:
Fabulous. Just, fabulous.
(Also, could I hire you to decorate my daughter's bedroom? Leta's looks Teh Awesome.)
325. Lyndsey said:
Did Leta help you put your wardrobe together? Because that's exactly how my 5 year old daughter wants to dress me. So Princessy!!
326. Chloe said:
These pictures just literally made my week.
327. Melis said:
Dude, seriously, you are entirely too cool. I LOVE those photos!!
(Also, love Leta's room- totally beautiful...)
328. Maddie said:
Holy fetus, I just pissed my pants laughing at this! I had to de-lurk and tell you that=)
329. amber of theambershow said:
Weirdo.
You make me happy :)
330. DeppFan said:
Hells bells, I love those photos.
331. Nataliya said:
You definitely surprised me. Love the photos. :)
332. Lori W said:
!!!hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha!!!!!!!
I am glad you are feeling better.
333. Amy said:
You look both crazy and like someone I want to be best friends with all at once. The thing that made me giggle is that someday, baby girl will see these photos and will never be able to say you aren't cool again. Because hello? You are the coolest.
334. Clair Duddy said:
Happy 20 weeks!
And I think Isla (eye-lah) would be a beautiful name to go with Leta ;)
335. Anonymous said:
lol! you're such a goofball! and you look great - and skinny... you butt! :p
336. Emily said:
you're pretty pale.
337. kitty said:
Silly, Dooce! Don't you know that you are supposed to wear your tutu on Intergalactic Tutu Day? (2/2-- get it? hehe -- http://www.intergalactictutuday.org)
You look so cute! :D
338. Russ said:
My wife is 22 weeks along and she has not yet donned the tu-tu/pink mid-drift outfit. Fuck, did we miss a class somewhere?
339. anita said:
my left thigh is bigger than your belly.
340. Terri Sinclair said:
TOO cute....really. Too damn cute!
341. thefirecat said:
The Daily Heather Photo: Chuck's Revenge.
Seriously. He dressed you like this and made you pose, didn't he.
342. Dawn said:
Awesome. Seriously. Best photos ever. I laughed so loud...you look adorable!
343. SJ said:
Let me guess, those photos are a response to the responses you got from your other frowny pregnancy picture? Awesome. I love the sarcasm. :)
344. Amanda Brumfield said:
Woman, I love you.
345. sandra said:
MUCH nicer than your last 'week' photo.
Chuck's going to be pissed though, when he finds out you borrowed his tutu.
346. Tee said:
This is hysterical! Congrats.
347. Olivia said:
The sound you just heard is a sudden drop in my self-esteem. I could totally pass as being 20 weeks pregnant. I would like to think that was due to baby weight. But no, no. It's just the half a dozen of chocolate chip cookies I ate from Paradise Bakery.
348. Wendy said:
Beautiful!
349. Gooseberried said:
Dear Lord, why do you have a tutu? I hope for Leta's sake and not...Jon's.
350. stefanie said:
oh please, god, make the second photo the author picture for your next book. i will give you actual real money to do it. please? that would be amazing!
351. Anonymous said:
The most hilarious thing about the pictures is that you look slightly demented in them (and I mean that in the absolute nicest way).
352. Coyote said:
So nice of Chuck to let you wear his tutu!
I gained a pound a week. I think that's a healthy goal.
All the fat gets sucked back out when you breastfeed, so no worries.
353. Kelsey said:
You look beautiful! It looks like osmosis did its job as resulting in the princess attire, probably to Leta's delight.
PS: Will you be doing a Leta newsletter for this month? I am looking forward to it!
354. mama speak said:
Ok, no more holding out we know there's an EXACT pix of John in this outfit floating around! Post it now puleeezzeee!!!
OMG! You look awesome! Just awesome, and your "belly" is still smaller than mine, so :-P Glad you're feeling better. You need family pix w/all of you in the same outfit. OMG! Not THAT would be awesome!
355. SurprisingWoman said:
These are tooooo cute!
So glad you are feeling better. You look fabulous.
356. Tasha said:
Love love LOVE the pictures!
357. AZ girl said:
Ha! You look great! And I think its pretty obvious that you're feeling better ;-)
One question though... now that you're preggers, are you going to stop doing the monthly newsletters to Leta? I hope not!!!! :(
358. Becca said:
I have suffered from depression in the past and have also come out of it (for now anyway), and let me just say it's thrilling for me to see you so happy. Can't wait for Baby Girl Amstrong #2! And happy early birthday to Leta. :-)
359. Erica said:
If there were ever a doubt in my mind that you were totally awesome and definitely a hero of mine, that doubt is GONE.
360. Jenn said:
I just laughed so hard, a little pee came out.
361. Jodie H said:
You have crazy eyes. The exhaustion and nausea may have been replaced by euphoric psychosis.....
Enjoy the middle months! Sex drive come back yet?
362. Christina said:
Love it. You look amazing.
my captcha says beheaded maman. Freaky.
363. Julie said:
This is A W E S O M E! ! ! ! ! thank you:)
364. just beth said:
You are such a jerk. ;-) you have no idea what it means to be all big, like BIG, big. You look fabulous... and only a LITTLE creepy. Ha.
Can't wait to meet you in seattle! I promise to at least TRY not to cry and beg you to be my best friend.
XO
B
365. Nielfa Hanifa said:
What wonderful boobs you have :P
I want to be pregnant, but I think more so that I can have some extra cleavage to gawk at.
366. Anonymous said:
nice picture
367. Anonymous said:
actually, you look kind of scary!
368. Marlies said:
You look amazing and so happy!
Love it!
369. Jennifer in Italy said:
Oh my god. This is hilarious. You look beautiful, Heather! Thank you for making me laugh hysterically in the middle of a library.
370. JudyInMaine said:
You have outdone yourself!
371. Antra said:
Your latest masthead is suddenly looking very apt. And here we were thinking we'd seen all your types of crazy already...
372. Non-Mom-Woman-Surviver said:
Hi Heather, although I am not a mom (strictly and in its literally meaning) I can grasp and feel the message (if any)those funny photos spread all around. A sense of mystic and supernatural happiness in a new world of your own, like a virgin (a real one, expecting a baby), within a golden frame, hanging in our personal wall, the wall of all of us where we usually read you and share with you your mom adventures and misadventures. You look like a virgin Almodovar would make up from his own fantastic kitsch world turning it to an universal icon. Those photos surely will become fetiche posters anyone can miss of having it hanging in his/her bedroom praying and pleading for a new mesias. I've just let my imagination flew. Too much. Wharhol would have also made up something from those photos, surely.
373. Q said:
...best ...photos ...ever
you are just too cool:)
374. Viktor said:
You look fabulous.
I will assume from the context that you are not drunk, even if the resemblance to your dancing is uncanny. :)
375. Elaine at Lipstickdaily said:
Welcome to the second trimester! Enjoy the honeymoon! Sheesh . . . my belly looked like that before I was pregnant . . . you don't even want to mention 7 months. Enjoy!
376. Julie said:
Your too cute ! lol.
377. alfredsmom said:
Haha! I second the commenter that asked you to please recreate these photos around 35 weeks!
378. Lee said:
Oh my gosh you are smiling!!!! I am going to die laughing if you end up actually naming the baby Aurora...
Is that current or backlogged princess crap????
I'm so happy you are feeling better....
379. StacieRae said:
So, are you the pregnancy fairy? If so, could you stop by my house next week and grant me my wish? I'll even leave a five under my pillow.
Seriously, you look great, thanks for the giggle.
380. Kylie ... said:
OH MY!
I'm ALMOST typeless with laughter.
As always, you crack me up. Go, you good thing!
381. Tanya said:
Love the Fairy Princess props! Looking great! Totally loved seeing Leta's room yesterday, I love your style! There is a woman, by the name of Ali Edwards, who is a celebrity scrapbooker/life artist and she is soon to have a baby. She shared pics of the baby's nursery, if you have time, you really should check it out. it is so awesome!
http://aliedwards.typepad.com/_a_/2009/01/around-the-room-baby-a.html
I even think she is a reader of yours, she actually mentioned your name earlier last week in a post!
382. Karrie said:
What a beautiful portrait series... it should be called "Dooce... a wash of hormones". Your expression in the second one kind of reminds me of a Cover Girl campaign, the sheer delight that wearing too much cheap make up (too many sparkles)naturally brings to a girl.
383. The Furry Godmother said:
All Hail Princess Pregnacy!
384. James John Malcolm said:
I, for one, welcome our new overlord Chuck, who puts things on Dooce's head!
385. Leah said:
Oh My God your so adorable!!!
Glad you are feeling better:)
And I'm glad that I'm not the only one
with pictures of myself in a tutu:)
386. kristi said:
I'm a little scared of you right now...
387. Carley said:
That's so weird - I wore that same outfit to work today!
You look great!
388. Becca said:
Love these Heather!! You are freaking cute!!!
389. Jess said:
did Jon survive the photoshoot?
anyway, I think noone can spot the 17pounds.. like my tummy is bigger, sadly, since im not preggie =(
390. Sarah said:
WOW Heather .. congrats on the weight GAIN :) you look awesome and happy, and I couldn't be happier for you!!
p.s Leta's room: sweet and beautiful for a princess!!
What are in the pink and black boxes in the bookshelf? I'm guessing lots of princess junk. But just asking!
391. Dana said:
Dude. I just snorted yogurt out of my nose. YOGURT! Thank god I didn't put granola in it this morning. I think you could call those photos hysterically beautiful.
392. JFly said:
You are the prettiest princess in all the land.
393. Krysta said:
greatest. pictures. EVER.
394. Kelly said:
How adorable! And there is no way you have 17 lbs additional on you - you look fantastic.
395. Kim's Korner said:
So the day Princess Aurora gets married, I do hope you'll have this up on a big screen behind the head table ;-)
Love the pics!
You look absolutely wonderful!
And happy.
And just a little bit crazy.
But that's why we all love you! ;-)
396. Katie said:
Well this totally made my day.
397. Sarah said:
Wow, these are a little frightening. :) I just found out I'm pregnant and it's great to see I have so much to look forward to! ;)
398. KateM said:
Gorgeous!
My suggestion for a name - Amelia.
399. eve said:
first response:
OH MY GOD HEATHER.
second:
hmm .. indeed dooce is looking rather pink lately :) :)
400. Lindsey said:
I almost peed my pants thats so amusing! :)
401. Erika said:
That is the Best. Thing. Ever!
402. Jen said:
I can't even explain how much I needed to see those photos today!! LMAO!! Priceless!
403. maeby said:
love the second photo! totally made my day!
404. Cat said:
I assume that Leta was in charge of the creative direction for this photo shoot.
I was not expecting to see that today. Thank you for putting a little joy back into the winter.
Also, yay for giant asses!
405. Lanna Lee Maheux-Quinn said:
I love these pictures! And they are even more funny when I think about your previous Week photos. Very silly and very awesome!
406. Jamie Lauren said:
Those pictures are hysterical! And by hysterical,I of course, mean disturbing. Lucky for you, crazy is hereditary! You look awesome!
407. Paula said:
Okay, those are great pictures! I busted a gut here at my desk.
Although I have to ask, what Miss Leta said when she saw that you were using her fairy princess props.
You look fabulous!
408. renee said:
that is the fucking funniest photo i have ever seen in my life.
and p.s: i gained a pound a week for the entire 40 weeks when i was preggers. and i threw up for 3 months. and i'm 5'4". so suck it up, sista.
409. moggit girls said:
We think this look directly references the little known "20 week crazy pocket window" where your hormones inexplicably make you giddy and full of glee. No worries, this too shall pass...
(Although we really dig it on you)
Joy and Janet
moggit.com
410. Meg said:
Whoa, you have the crazy eye in these pictures! I wonder if it's pregnancy or the tutu that causes the manic gleam.
Now... when do we see Chuck in the tutu?
411. Jenn said:
Wow.
Was this Leta's idea? She must have been thrilled that you were in something pink and sort of related to a princess costume.
Amazing.
412. StyckyWycket said:
Wow, if pregnancy energizes me to that point of ecstasy (tutu included), I might have to give those hormones a try. :) I hope these photos end up in the new baby book.
413. Joy said:
What? 17 pounds? Where the heck are you storing those? Cuz you look great!
414. Ames said:
Ok, this could possibly be your best post ever! Hilarious!
415. Jen said:
Best post ever!
416. Tiffany said:
LMFAO! Looks like someone got into Leta's princess toys. This made my day!
417. Amy said:
Oh.My.F'ing.god!!! How hilarious! The sun BETTER start shining soon or else you're gonna loose it... oh wait.. you already have! LOL
418. Eddy said:
Gorgeous but...that's going to haunt me in my dreams. Forever.
419. Anonymous said:
aww man, you're only doing this to appease the anonymous peepers who think the world is full of butterflies, unicorns or flying pigs.
And these people choose to berate you on YOUR blog for not smiling in your pictures (screw them) and they don't realize that you can do whatever you'd like on YOUR blog... great pic, a little odd, but funny...
420. Laurie said:
You Rock. That is all.
421. melissa said:
Your pictures rock! I will be laughing all day after seeing them.
422. Amy said:
This post made my morning. Good luck finding pool cover sized panties, though. I'e already snagged most of them up to cover my 24-week pregnant ass. :)
423. carpot said:
OMG, these are the BEST pictures I have ever seen here! ROFLMAO...this totally made my day! Dooce, you rock the preggo!
424. vicky said:
Those pictures are freaking awesome. Although I don't see where you hid 17 pounds because you barely look pregnant!!
425. Julia said:
Okay, these are awesome.
426. Sabrina said:
Hey, where'd you get that tutu?!?!
427. Random Musings said:
LOVE.IT.
Too cute.. I bet Leta was all giggles when you did this
428. Samantha said:
OK, first off, I'm at 19 weeks being pregnant and you look so much better than I do, and it appears you're feeling better than I do as well.
Second, great outfit and great picture! Poor kid. :)
429. Tracylea said:
ahhh, the sarcasm is palpable and STILL You are gorgeous :) Also, I ALWAYS have panties which could cover a pool so if you need shopping tips... (j/k by the way, cuz that's a little creepy)
430. hotpants said:
These pictures made my day. You look great!
431. miriam said:
(the comment that will not be read)
Dude! Where is YOUR belly? I decided to save time and gain about 15 pounds in the first trimester, and have been holding my breath waiting for the next cycle of explosive growth.
432. leesavee said:
I expect to see those framed and on the wall somewhere in your house! Too freakin' hilarious!
433. momomatic said:
Who are you--the Frootcake Fairy?
If not, that's cool as I am way digging the belly shot!
434. Tori said:
Oh my goodness, these pictures are HILAR! Cheers to you. :)
435. Audrey said:
Was Leta terrified or mesmerized by this photo shoot?
436. Kindlelynn said:
If you could please walk around downtown Utah with that outfit, your preggo belly and a bottle of Makers Mark, that would make my day. Please and thank you.
437. lucesco said:
I was really not expecting that before scrolling down. You just made my morning. Add this to the list of reasons why this is one of the best sites ever!
438. Abi said:
OMG! That's hysterical! I almost had coffee up my nose. *heart* the tutu. What does Leta think of Fairy Princess Mommy?
439. Tracy said:
You are a wonderfully crazy woman! Just remember,...you're NOT getting fat. You're growing a baby.
There IS a difference.
440. teetotaled said:
I have been happily posing for photos standing sideways for the past few months to document my belly however I cannot let my husband see these images otherwise he will want to break out the costumes.
I hope you asked Leta before you borrorwed her princess gear for your photo shoot! LOL
God these are fantastic, thanks for the laugh!
441. Jen said:
Thank you for the belly laugh! I really needed that. These are by far better than Chuck's pics (sorry Chuck, no offense).
442. Amanda said:
You are so cute. And sarcastic. And I love you like a sister even though you don't know me. (And yes, those pictures remind me of something my sister and I would do...in fact, when one of us gets pregnant, I think I'm going to suggest this very thing to her!)
Yay baby!
Amanda
443. JessicaAPISS said:
HILARIOUS~!!!!
444. Joy said:
The look on your face scares the poo out of me! No really! But you do look like your feeling better. Those pictures are going to be priceless when you show them to your daughters first boyfriend!
:-)Joy
445. Emily said:
OMG, hahahha. These are fantastic! :D
446. Abby said:
I can only imagine the conversation between you and Jon about what you were going to wear for this one. Great pictures only because I can tell you were laughing moniacally the whole time!
I was going to suggest Lola for a name, but then I remembered it was your Aunt's name and I thought that might be a little too much of a namesake for the little one to carry on. Congratulations on your second little girl!
447. Nikki said:
FANTASTIC!!!! Loved it! You made my snow day even better!
448. Amazing Greis... said:
Leta totally dressed you for these photos, didn't she?
449. M.R. said:
Heather, you look healthy and beautiful, but your facial expression in these is frightening...Fairy Land Caverns at Lookout Mountain frightening. Still, awesome. And glad you are feeling better!
450. Jill S. said:
Seventeen, smeventeen. You look maaaaaaaarvelous, darling.
451. aimee said:
Awesome pics! You have to be the cutest pregnant woman ever! I love your little baby bump!
452. Jess said:
Dude, seriously. You are so brave. That second photo portrays the kind of crazy that is for my hubby's eyes only. Love it!
453. Jeanne said:
you.so.did.not throw out Leta's princess items!!! you kept them for yourself!! well done, mom!
454. Swedebead said:
Hysterical! You look great, and I may want to hurt you as I probably had gained 17 pounds in my first 3 weeks of pregnancy ;)I continue to hope for the best for you and your family!
455. Dale said:
You rock. I wish I had pictures of me like that while preggo. You look beautiful. And BTW, Bravado makes maternity undies that go under the belly and are actually comfortable (well, that's my opinion). And they say Bravado across your butt which I loved. My youngest is 2 and my husband finally made me get real undies in November. But they were just so comfy.
456. jusy said:
You are freaking ugly!
457. A Seattleite in Paris said:
lol. You know Leta will pull out these photos in 30 years to explain Grandma Heather to her kids. :)
458. tara said:
uh, i'll have what she's having?! seriously. i'm feeling better at 23 weeks but nothing like what you seem to be feeling. and these photos? priceless. congrats!
459. Mari said:
Those pictures even made me like pink!
Not easy to do in January friggin' cold Utah.
460. Missy said:
You are one SMOKIN' HOT MAMA! And the fact that you have such a great sense of humor really does bump you up to FABULOUS!
461. Kellie said:
Naturally I am looking at your site at work and of course as soon as I saw those photos I about spit a doughnut all over the screen. My Boss is still amazed at my laugh projectile.
You are the pregnant woman I aspire to be!
Gratz again!
462. claire said:
On behalf of your average American readers, I feel compelled to let you know that it's very annoying when thin people make jokes about how fat they are.
The photos are really funny though! Congratulations on the baby!
463. SAHM: Surviving Assorted Home Mayhem said:
Happy pool cover panty shopping!
464. tanya kristine said:
cripes. i'm twice that size and NOT pregnant.
465. Anonymous said:
Those pictures remind me: congrats on your mention in the newest Playboy mag. Kudos!
466. Lindsey (Yankee Girl Designs) said:
See, you really are the pregnancy fairy, that outfit proves it! I knew you had something to do w/ me getting knocked up!
467. Melissa said:
I love these pictures! Your face is priceless :) Congrats on the baby bump and hope the rest of the pregnancy goes well :)
Oh and cute baby names.....Addelynn? Kyree? Skyra?
468. Eryn C. said:
Just think. You're nearly halfway through your pregnancy and you barely look pregnant. i'm sure you'd want to punch me in the teeth if i said that to you in person!
like everyone else said....amazing, hilarious, faboo!
looking forward to when your book tour brings you to Austin in April!
469. Nicole said:
You are a crazy person...that is why I love you!!
470. Kayla said:
BAHAHAHA!
You're kinda amazing X12
471. Luna said:
First off, GREAT pictures. They made me giggle. Secondly, I'm 18 weeks pregnant and have a FAR bigger baby belly than you. But I've only gained 5 pounds (I was a size 6 before getting pregnant, so I wasn't overweight or anything). Odd, isn't it?
472. Kaydee said:
Very funny!
I'm reminded of the ghost of Christmas present in Scrooged with Bill Murray. Are you looking at a toaster?
473. repliderium.com said:
Bet Leta loved those shots! I am embarrassed to say that her room is larger than my apartment.
474. cat said:
are you wearing leta's t-shirt? hey nice haircut!! xx
475. hillary said:
Best. Belly Pictures. Ever.
476. dre said:
Shit, you are funny! I was NOT expecting that! That tu-tu is cracking me up... and scaring me a little. Glad you're feeling good.
477. Michelle S said:
Did Chuck dress you up that way and take your picture? Or was it Leta?? You're too funny.
478. Marcie said:
You are a riot! Such a fun mom you must be.
479. Julienne said:
There are no words.. :)
480. Anonymous said:
Brava! You are beyond glowing. Stunning!
481. kalen said:
print these out & frame them & hang them in the nursery. i am pretty sure they will aid in in your PPD not returning.
i'm also pretty sure i can never been sad again myself, whilst simultaneously looking at these.
482. Kerstin said:
Very cute! Good to see you happier looking than in the last belly shot too.
Happy remaining pregnancy!!
483. Catherine said:
I want you to know, you are one of the only reasons I have ever thought breeding would be worth my while and that I might not suck at it. That I could be myself, be a parent & not raise a potential serial killer. These pictures really solidify for me.
484. erinhazel said:
i appreciate your ironic sense of humor (and am amused that so many people on the Internetz do not pick up on it).
kthxbye.
485. addie said:
hahahaha!!! laughed so hard i nearly peed my pants! love the pics :o)
486. Jill said:
Tomorrow I think you should let Chuck wear the tiara and tutu. I'm sure he'll be just as excited about it as you are.
487. Anonymous said:
Dooce - Don't worry 17lbs is nothing - I am at week 23 and now is when they say "the real weight gain begins" I was like what do you mean "the real weight gain" freaking 20 lbs in 5 months is not "real" weight gain!?!?! Laughter is the best medicine and you definatley made me laugh - cheers to you!
488. Nulli said:
The first one is absolutely the Best! Well Done!
489. Katbliss said:
LOVE these pics!
Next time you're in Playboy (like you are this month) be sure to send these pics instead. :)
490. Lisa said:
Dooce - dare I say it? You look really happy! And beautiful! So glad to see both - and the princess outfit is fantastic.
:-)
491. Matin said:
You look crazy but I bet Leta loved it:-)
X M
492. anika said:
I'm not going to lie, those are my favorite belly pics EVAH! Love it!
493. Anonymous said:
You look uglier than usual,if that were even possible. Another hideous freak child. Yay! I hope this one isn't all timid and fucked up and weird looking like the last one.
494. sonya said:
Neato pictures!
495. Mel Heth said:
YOU are my hero.
496. Rhyanna said:
LOL on the second one. I love a woman with a nice crazy gleam in her eyes.
497. Bekah said:
I can only assume that Leta peed her self out of excitement after seeing these photos. You look a bit princess-like.
498. Mallory said:
Too funny... you are hysterical! Please keep the themed pergnancy photos coming- they brighten my day :)
499. sybann said:
This is simply gorgeous. Engorgeous?
500. Rachael said:
o.k those pictures are fuckin hilarious (yes, I have to swear...they were just that kick ass)
501. Anonymous said:
i think i see your next book jacket portrait.
502. Sara said:
hee hee! love that second one. hope this trend continues throughout the pregnancy.
503. Cindy said:
Love these photos. You're one-of-a-kind, Heather. (Why do you have a tutu? LOL!)
504. Kristi said:
Oh. My. God. I LOVE THESE PICS!!!!
You are so funny that other office people are looking at me like I've lost it.
I love you, Heather. Thanks for the wonderful crackups!!
(And I agree... Leta is gonna be PISSED if/when she sees that Mommy took her princess accessories!)
505. jana said:
Wow, these photos are just...wow. This made my day.
506. Scargosun said:
Can I borrow that if I decide to have a child?
507. DesignGirl said:
OMG you look like some sort of deranged cupid! But a beautiful one nonetheless. So glad you are feeling better. I've been sending happy thoughts your way, hopefully this means they worked!
508. Betsy said:
Um. Insane...and I love it.
509. Jeff said:
I see the pregnant boobs are coming back with a vengeance!
510. Christina said:
OH MY GOSH!!! These are awesome pictures! Glad to hear your feeling better.
511. Kit said:
FAAAAANtastic
512. Ellen said:
Damn, girl, you're the Pregnant Fairy!
It's the eyes, they never lie. . .
513. Yvonne said:
1st time comment. I couldn't help it. These pictures are FABULOUS!
You look so gorgeous. I bet Leta was proud....
514. Kim said:
It's knocked up Carrie Bradshaw! That said, you are very cool, and it's nice to see someone pregnant who has maintained her sense of humour!
515. Anonymous said:
oh sister, you look amazing and i gained more than that in the first day i found out i was pregnant than you have gained in 20 weeks. lol.
516. Talullah said:
Pretty sure we have the same due date (June 11th?). Your belly looks likes it's in the the process of digesting a small Italian sub, not setting up shop to make a human.
517. Gen said:
Gorgeous belly. I don't really see the 17 pounds... seriously, you gained 17 pounds?!
518. Janie said:
Oooh...does Leta know you are TOUCHING HER STUFF!?
Perfect shots! These should put all the people who didn't think you looked happy enough about your pregnancy, right in their place. (Of course, that will leave plenty of room for all the people who will say you're not taking this seriously enough! LOL)
519. Anonymous said:
Do you have a studio in your house?
great pics!
Seriously, you look amazing, like if you just took a moderate dump you could totally hit the red carpet with out spanks!
520. PB Rippey/sleepless mama said:
Now THAT'S the way to celebrate a pregnancy!!! I hope you frame those photos and keep them forever. When Leta is President, she can hang them in the Oval Office. Right on!
521. tali said:
What does Leta think about your get up? You must have taken these while she was at school :)
522. Robyn said:
360. Jenn said:
I just laughed so hard, a little pee came out.
+++++
For all of you who feel compelled to share similar insightful witticisms with the world...gross. Class with a capital "K." Really. Leave such attempts to Heather, who's infinitely better at it.
Heather, in addition to being (hands-down) the bravest woman on the net today, you look fabulous. Getting those photos must have been a story in itself. :-) Glad you're feeling better.
523. Robyn said:
519. Anonymous said:
if you just took a moderate dump you could totally hit the red carpet with out spanks!
+++++
OMG--I rest my case.
524. Courtney said:
You are gorgeous. And retarded. Love it!
525. Sara Joy said:
...on the flip side, you are still thinner than, oh, 92% of us and your hair looks AWESOME. I think you are ahead of the game...
526. minxlj said:
FUNNIEST PHOTOS EVER. And yes, I agree with earlier commenters that Jon should model the same outfit. It's the least he could do.
Sorry, Jon ;)
527. Katie said:
Okay, so this seriously made me laugh and cheered me up. This is too funny! Must be in response to all the "HEATHER, OMFG, YOU ARE SO GRUMPY! YOU ARE PREGNANT THEREFORE YOU SHOULD BE JOYOUS AND GLOWING!" I love this. The expressions on your face are classic.
And you look awesome, by the way.
528. Nicole said:
Frickin PRICELESS. This is by far one of the best things I've seen on your site Heather. I wonder how Leta feels about this?
529. jaclyn gelb said:
Oh Girlfriend, what a beautiful way to deal with it. I can relate; I absolutely HATED gaining weight when I was pregnant and then I TRIPLE HATED the fact that I hated it because it meant my baby was healthy. I have one word for you when the baby is born: ready...you listening? Put yor ear up close to the internet....PILATES. Not the cheap kind the gym offers; private lessons on the reformer with a kick-ass teacher. Expensive? Yes. Indulgent? Absolutely. Worth every penny? Honey, you have no idea!!
530. Anonymous said:
Robyn @ 522 and 523:
Get over yourself.
531. Laurie said:
I've come back to these photos throughout my day just so I can giggle. You're something!
532. SprockGirl said:
I absolutely love it, you look amazing. Does this mean you're coming out with a line of maternity wear now, lol?! Ghetto Princess Mommy Chic? Just kidding Congratulations on the the baby, you rock!
533. Teresa said:
You were wearing Crocs too, right? too funny
534. nakedpastor said:
hilarious. love the pics!
535. Lyz said:
Heather. I am due within days of you, and have only gained 6 lbs (so says the doctor - I personally think he's lying).
HOWEVER. My belly is at least 2 months ahead of you. I keep telling myself "She has an incredibly long torso...".
Pregancy is wonderfully crazy! We produce mostly similar babies, but can look so totally different from each other in the process!
536. Bunny said:
What lotion do you use on your belly? Your skin looks AMAZING! I've had two children and you could confidently drive from Florida to Alaska with the road map my stretch marks created. And your boobs look insane!
Great photos. They would be adorable on the nursery wall...or a life size poster in the closet: the ultimate closet monster!
537. Rio Gringa said:
Oh man, Leta is going to be pissed if she sees though pictures! :)
538. In Due Time said:
Looks like Jon got you to smile. All it took was a tiara and a tutu. WTG Jon!
539. Kate said:
That just made me laugh out loud. And I so needed that today.
540. Amy said:
You are such a freak, and I mean that in the best possible way! I love it. What a fun mom you are. Anyway, from someone who also experienced a serious bout of PPD (after baby depression), I pray that you have a better experience with this pregnancy, delivery and so on and so forth. God bless!
541. Kathryn said:
uh ohhhhhh don't let Leta see you using her Princess Stuff (I believe that's a proper noun, yes?)!!! Love the pictures, though.
542. Toni said:
I can't believe that you posted those pictures on the WORLD WIDE WEB. Hilarious! Be proud of your 17 pounds! I gained 45 pounds and lost 50 after I had my baby. You go girl!
543. Becki said:
You look demented . . . but in a good way. ;-)
544. HollyLynne said:
These photos are so aweseome. I'm going to buy myself a tutu when I get pregnant, just so I can copy them. And, you know, so I can have a tutu.
545. Mirinda said:
those pics are hilarious. and if you've gained 17 lbs I'd love to know where the crap it went. my tummy was that size by 12 weeks with all three of mine!
546. Rebecca said:
Holy shit, Heather, you are HOT.
(no, really! you totally are!)
547. Jen said:
Those are the most hilarious belly pics I've ever seen.
However, I currently look as pregnant as you do, and I am not pregnant. :(
548. Heidi said:
Holy crap, that's funny. I just laughed out loud.
549. Kathleen said:
You just ooze snarkiness...in the best possible way!
550. kryssie_cat said:
Best. Pictures. Ever!
551. rhea said:
It's been said before: Awesome!
552. Moya said:
Do not let Chuck see that you stole his tiara!
553. Erica Hennings said:
LOVE the photos! Jon must have had a BLAST taking these of you.
554. Anonymous said:
Hilarious.
A Hallmark moment.
555. Adrienne said:
My father, smart ass that he is, used to look out at the washline and seeing my mother's panties hanging to dry would declare, "Look, your mom is drying her Coleman's." It took me years to realize he was comparing her underwear to camping tents.
556. jan said:
A brilliant woman with her head screwed on right who can make fun of herself, have fun, and be funny and beautiful. Oohwah we bow to thee. (OK, laying that on a little thick, but really, this is worth a ton o' trolls. Let em crawl back into their boxes.)
557. jan said:
A brilliant woman with her head screwed on right who can make fun of herself, have fun, and be funny and beautiful. Oohwah we bow to thee. (OK, laying that on a little thick, but really, this is worth a ton o' trolls. Let em crawl back into their boxes.)
558. Lori said:
Okay, I'm 5'11"...10 weeks ago I weighed 136 pounds...and today at 10 weeks pregnant with my first I'm bigger than you. At this rate, I'll be looking for panties that cover the Atlantic!
Love the pics!!
559. marianne said:
EFFING RAD!!
560. Jen said:
Best photos ever.
561. Bad White Trash Memories said:
These pictures should be entitled "Chuck's Revenge."
562. Elaine said:
Wow, if I gained 17 pounds I'd look like an oompa loompa. It must be nice to be tall sometimes! These pictures are pretty funny; thanks for sharing them with us!
563. Candice said:
You are fabulous. Congrats on reaching the halfway mark.
564. SOWEN said:
You are freakin HILARIOUS!
You are a nut!!!!
565. Bea said:
So that's where all Leta's princess stuff went. Does she know, is she still alive? I can't imagine how traumatized she would be to know that her MOM is wearing HER princess stuff.
Love, love, love it. It looks so wrong, but feels so right!
566. Anonymous said:
Ummmmm...yuck....
567. Brat said:
Does Leta know you're playing with her shit?
She's gonna be pissed!
You gots some balls, Heather. LOVE IT!
568. Chris said:
AWESOME!
569. Kylee said:
Nothing else could have made this day any better.
Seriously.
570. Nicole said:
Oh my goodness you are beautiful even as a pregnant princess! You have a mommy glow which is something I never had when I was pregnant....at least I never saw it.
571. M@ said:
this is my new wallpaper. I LOVE IT!
572. dt said:
Take THAT, Princess Leta! Ha.
573. Tina Hennigar said:
Jesus, to look like you even at 5 months prego is but a dream.
574. darcy Sletager said:
So weird that people who read a blog talking about boobs and poop, would get so fired up about some one posting a comment about it.
These mommy blog comment threads are so damn cutthroat.
575. Amanda said:
That is so fucking awesome. I think all of the rest of the pictures need to be this badass.
576. Domestic Goddess (in training) said:
When I was a little kid I was totally petrified of the tooth fairy. I thought she came and stole the teeth from your mouth. The second picture (where you smile in a manic and slightly psychotic way) totally brought those nightmares back.
Thanks for that.
577. Nelly said:
Laughed so hard, brillant!
578. Amy E. said:
Seriously, the best pregnancy pics EVER.
579. Imanitsud said:
Where are you STRETCHMARKS from Leta??!? Damn you. Kidding, of course.
580. Bokraahla said:
wow! you are so pretty!
581. Kristina said:
Please please PLEASE do this same picture, maybe with some photoshopped-in fairy sparkles, in about 2 months. All I ask. That might actually need to be the cover of your next book, even if it's a Pulitzer-award winning novel about Inuit salmon fishing in Alaska. Or whatever.
582. jex said:
what amazes me is the stupid dolts that think everything you do is just oh so funny! Personally I think you are fucking butt ugly and not even remotely funny!
583. Sunny said:
I'm laughing hysterically at the best belly pics EVER! Glad to see you're feeling so much better.
584. Kate said:
Great. Now I need a tutu.
585. Jessica said:
oh sweet goodness you have spent too much time in Leta's room! These are great pictures!
586. Taylee said:
20 weeks....it looks more like 20 days. Your tiny. Notta thing is showin. As for the pictures...pretty damn funny!
587. Dena said:
I think you look beautiful.
588. Jennifer said:
You are too cute!
589. winecat said:
STUPENDOUS!!
590. WK said:
Damn. I just laughed out loud in my very quiet workplace. You look amazing!
591. Angela said:
Dooce,
You're totally fraking scary right now! Really love the outfit.
592. Addie said:
These pictures made me happy. You're pretty in pink and rather hot! I'll bet Leta loved it (you're a princess!) or hated it (don't touch my stuff!).
593. holly said:
after a day of being over my head in studying, dealing with the terrible twos, spilling my coffee (that wasn't that good in the first place) all over my notes, and having to look at the gloomy sky all day... THIS is exactly what i needed! you're beautiful! you made me LOL.
CONGRATS heather!
594. Karen said:
Seriously? If you think you are fat while looking like that, you will have only yourself to blame when Leta develops an eating disorder sometime down the road. Stop fucking putting yourself down. Gaining weight when pregnant is NORMAL. Makes for healthy babies. Get over yourself.
595. Mike said:
Looks like the boobie fairy came as well. Lucky Jon!
596. Anonymous said:
Some of us wish we looked that thin when we're NOT pregnant.
597. Danielle said:
OMG, you are so effing cute. Glad you are feeling better!
598. Amy said:
Oh my. You made me laugh out loud. REALLY LOUD.
You're awesome.
599. lc said:
beautiful!
600. jonesie said:
You made me smile out loud!