• http://www.xanga.com/Bratfink Brat

    I’m so glad those days are waaaaaaaaaaay behind me!

    I never had much of a sense of humor when I was preggers, though.

    Might have helped if I had.

  • http://lookedgoodonpaper.wordpress.com TamiA

    Oh God. Memories of being 8 months pregnant in the middle of Utah summer are coming back. I think I would be more comfortable if I had a bunch of needles stuck up my ass.
    Hang in there, because you have no other choice.
    Thanks for the laugh.

  • sue

    I’m finding all of this funny. I’m one week ahead of you Heather with my first. I actually don’t think it’s been so bad! But it’s fun to get to gripe about it whenever the mood suits. I’m just glad to be pregnant and holding it! Maybe it makes up for wearing the most ridiculous outfits, just because that shirt and those pants fit! Don’t match? Don’t care!

  • Sara

    UGH I know what you mean about the…well…everything in this post. The boobs! They rival my 25-wk bump. The boob situation is out of control. I feel like my cleavage starts at my chin. I try to make myself feel better by thinking it’ll get better, you’re just pregnant. But oh yeah, they stay that huge throughout the nursing phase. Gah!

    Am I not alone in wanting to punch everyone who says “Just you wait!” to whatever I’m talking about in regards to this pregnancy? My daughter is just over 2, so it’s not like I don’t know how uncomfortable it gets. Just shut up already! I’m carrying all out front with this one (very different than last time), and every time I say anything about this, someone has to say “OoooOOO, just you wait, you’re going to get TONS bigger.” Really? I didn’t know that, considering I birthed a kid 2 years ago!

    And you look great. Your white tummy glows like mine does. Yay for albinos!

  • http://www.esmon.net Nichole

    I’m impressed that you’re still working out! I have a hard enough time getting motivated when I’m not pregnant.

  • http://scrappinjenny.blogspot.com Jennifer

    I only have one child, but I have heard from several friends that your second pregnancy is worse than your first one just because of the simple fact that you know what is going to happen. I really think that’s why I stuck with one kid. Been there, done that, no thanks.

  • http://parentheticalthoughts.wordpress.com Emma

    You are a champ for exercising this far into your pregnancy! WOW.

  • Natasha

    I am 24 weeks pregnant and I have no idea how you get to the gym each week?!? Can you please explain? I am exhausted, completely and absolutely wrecked by this pregnancy (its my first) and I waddle a twenty minute walk to work each day and that gets me into bed by about about 7pm. I have a friends party tomorrow and I’m thinking that its a good job that I have the day off so that I can nap in the afternoon and maybe make it until 10!

  • http://csquaredplus3.typepad.com Chris

    “But this isn’t really [as much] about the way I look as it is about the way I feel…” You’re so right about that being the equalizer for all women. It’s very “disorienting” being pregnant (also a perfect descriptor).

    If it makes you feel any better, and it probably won’t, you really do look fantastic. (I know you’re not fishing for compliments. I can tell you’re not that kind of gal.)


  • Sara

    Yes…I am 32 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and I so feel ya. My body is no longer my own. This grunting that escapes from me when I walk or roll over in bed or walk up stairs does not come from me. Something else has taken over.

    I’m looking forward to having control over my body again.

  • http://jens-space.typepad.com/ Jennifer

    My last two girls are really close in age and it felt like I was pregnant forever. I call those days The Pod Years. I felt like a baby making pod and nothing belonged to me.

    I think you’re doing great. You’re halfway there!

  • http://www.JenniferSuarez.com Jennifer Suarez

    I do enough bitching about getting up at 5am, 4 days a week, to run on a treadmill that’s IN MY HOUSE…. that I can’t even imagine how dedicated you must be to be going to the gym WHILE pregnant.

    My only motivation during pregnancy was to see how many McDonalds cheeseburgers would fit into my mouth at one time.

  • Anu

    You have a way with words that just makes even the most insipid situations sound absolutely hilarious. Good luck with the pregnancy. Since you hate being told “Just wait….” I’ll just say ” Well, you knew what you were getting into ;-) ”.

  • http://www.myfunnyfunnyfamily.com Carrie

    This will not make me popular but I am going to admit that seeing my body change through pregnancy has always been mostly a fun crazy adventure for me. I’m not saying it’s been without discomfort and sometimes all-out pain, but I infinitely prefer a nice hard baby belly to the squishy deflated-balloon gut I’m left with when it’s all over.

    In fact, I remember trying on a stretchy, clingy dress just a week or so before I found out I was pg with my second. I was studying my profile and trying to decide if my normal amount of stomach protrusion was ok in this dress. I actually thought, there in the dressing room, “This would look way cuter on me if I was pregnant.

    Six months later, I found out I was right. The dress looked hot on me pregnant, although I really had to watch my suddenly bountiful bosoms to make sure they stayed in. As a flat chested girl, getting some boobies for a few months is kind of like renting a $1,800 Prada bag.

    Maybe that’s why I’m on my third pregnancy. That and I really like eating for two.

  • JM

    This graph pretty much hit the nail on the head for me, although it’s missing the part where random strangers ask you whether you’re “toughening up your nipples” in advance of the baby. Ummm, and I know you how?


  • http://bluemonkeybutt.com/home Elle

    What is with those kind of people? They seem to love to give you the gory details, the gorier (is that even a word?) the better. “Ya, you should’ve seen it. The baby was 15lbs and I was stuck in the elevator with a piece of chewing gum and a bottle of Yoo Hoo. When they finally got the elevator working again it looked someone died in there. Just wait…”

    Been there 4 times…good luck!

  • Lauren

    No matter how much weight you gain, no matter how much you waddle now or in the next few months, you’ll be back to your old self again soon. You just wait! :)

  • Bec

    All I can think is: Isn’t it just amazing that we were created to give LIFE! It’s like, shouldn’t that be reserved for invisible, holy, entities?! But yet, we do! Our bodies shift and change and stretch to accomodate and nourish a new human.

    I had 3 sons in 3.5 years and every pregnancy was as different as each child’s personality was different! Yet still the same outcome every time… LIFE!

    I loved the entire process. I should note: I never once got sick and never was swollen like a blimp. I did have great big, firm, boobs and I did waddle…. and I got stretch marks, but I was the most beautiful I have ever been in my life when I was carrying my sons.

    Even still…. with all that being said… I’m sooooo glad it’s YOU and not me!!! Ha!


  • Anonymous

    Your website is cheering me up in an otherwise not-so-great time! Thank you!

  • http://rivetergirl.blogspot.com Robin

    I guess this is the first time in my life that I’m glad I’m not thin. I am tall but have always hauled around an extra 20 or so. I was one of the lucky ones, my pregnancy got way better every month. Once I was out of the first trimester blahs, I rocked the 2nd and 3rd. I was waiting for all those “just wait” moments, but they never came.

    What did bother me was all the labor and deliver horror stories. Every woman wanted to tell me of their days of labor, epidurals, breech babies, c-sections. So I like to share my labor story. I was in hard labor for about an hour. I pushed for about 10 minutes (and that was only because the doctor wasn’t there yet). After my daughter literally spurted into this world, I said to my husband, “That was easier than I thought.”

    So my comment to you is — Just wait and it could be easier than you think. And if not, you still get a baby out of the whole deal which makes all the other stuff so worth it. (Oh and you look gorgeous, I’m so jealous!)

  • Lisa

    You’re carrying this baby different because now YOU ARE ALL BROKEN IN!!! It is good that you are working out. You’ll only gain baby weight, have less of a chance for diabetes, have more of a pain tolerance and your recovery will be quicker afterward. I ran into my 4th month with my first and did aerobics up to a week before delivery. With my second I did NOTHING and we both almost died. Seriously. I took that as a wake up call to continue to work out as much as I could. That was 14 years ago. Now I think that my body is a special package, even without a baby in it because my kids still need me.

    Keep up the good work Heather! Jon too!

  • Lizzy

    I know it can be hard… but aren’t those kicks worth it?? I loved feeling those little feet/fists/nunchucks.

  • http://www.vintagechildrensbooksmykidloves.com Vintage Kids’ Books My Kid Loves

    Now, I might be remembering this wrong, but in Bradley class I seem to remember them saying that pregnant women waddle not because they are fat, but because their pelvic bones actually begin to loosen in preparation of child birth. Cold comfort, I know… but still.

  • http://maybeinutah.blogspot.com Mari

    Heh. Thanks, now I have no excuse not to exercise.

  • jlp

    “Just wait…” may have been my least favorite thing to hear up until last week when I went to the grocery store and had this conversation:

    Checker: So when are you due?

    Me: March 17.

    Checker: Wait, what? That makes you…

    Me: Just over 7 months.

    Checker: Are you having twins?!

  • Hollie

    Dear Anonymous who is in the middle of a second miscarriage,

    I’m so sorry for your loss. And so sorry someone called you a ‘Debbie Downer’, that was very insensitive.

    I love reading Dooce and what her readers take from it. Thank you for sharing and you’ll be in my thoughts during this difficult time.

  • http://www.knitdelaware.wordpress.com Krista M

    “Just wait…” Yeah, I hated that one, too. I also couldn’t stand “You may say that now, but…” Give it a rest, other mothers of the world! I was lucky, at least I never felt awkward or uncomfortable when I was pregnant, but that’s only because my midwife practically burned me alive with her eyes anytime she found out I ate cake.

  • Jen

    Being someone who just had her second child 3 months ago, every time I heard (or hear) “just wait…” I curse that person under my breath. I loathe those who feel the need to say something with those words in the sentence.

  • Molly

    I am bookmarking your site right now to come back to whenever I am ready to have kids. All I ever hear re: this process is inane “just you wait” type-stuff, not a voice (yours) that is genuinely curious about your own unique experience of it, and trying to grapple with the right words for this experience, rather than lean on platitudes. “My body doesn’t feel like my own”–isn’t pregnancy just a completely new way of seeing the world? We normally look at it through typically male and able-bodied eyes, where our bodies are completely our own.

  • http://www.dramaminequeen.com Brandy

    When my sister was 8 months strangers would tell her she was huge..she was all “oh this? taco bloat.” people would come up and ask her is she was having twins! She’s only 5’1″ so obviously she’s going to look waaay bigger than someone of average height who is preggers!

    You look awesome even if you don’t feel like it! If I could rock pregnancy like you have been I would get knocked up tonight!

  • Cassandra

    Just wondering how many cosmic points that the person who visits you in the hospital after you’ve given birth to that second child gets when they say to you, “You look thinner this time around than you did after your first…”

  • http://www.millatimes.com Milla

    brutal, heather! reading about your pregnancy has been great birth control for me. thanks.

  • http://www.aplanetnamedjanet.blogspot.com janet

    I dont remember much about my pregnancies. I am always amazed at those (my age) who remember every detail.

  • lindsayc

    I was never comfortable pregnant. I am shortish and thin, and I looked like I wasn’t pregnant from the back right up until delivery with both boys. I looked like the head of a torpedo by the eight month mark. I love having my boys, but pregnancy was an alien condition that I suffered through. I sure hope you are right about the karmic piano.

  • http://www.asianaisle.com Asian Aisle

    I need an honest friend like Carol. I’m enjoying your pregnancy updates, Heather. I missed them the first time around with Leta.

  • http://www.willfull.blogspot.com Kate

    Unfortunately, I have found that the “just wait” comments don’t stop once you’re no longer pregnant. If I’m frustrated with my two-year-old, well, “just wait until he’s 3 and a half” (or whatever). “Just wait” until you go back to work. “Just wait” until they are teenagers. DAMN people…stop it already!!

  • http://poppunkjunkie.blogspot.com Casey

    Best of luck with the pregnancy (and everything that follows)! I’m looking forward to reading all about it.

  • abonsig

    I’m laughing because I had a trainer prior to my pregnancy. When he saw me at the gym in the spring, he took me aside and said, “You know, everyone packs on the pounds in winter, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Come back and we’ll work on getting your waist back, ok?” I had to stifle my laughter since I was 4 or 5 months pregnant at the time. Two months later, clearly showing, I ran into him again. “I’ve been doing tons of crunches, but I just can’t seem to get rid of this belly…”

  • http://www.lovemaegan.com …love Maegan

    omg it WOULD have been funny if you didn’t tell the trainer you were preggo. The confusion alone would be priceless.

    also: the older I get the less I actually want to procreate. weird.

  • Molly

    I’m scared for you. I mean, I feel this way now….but that’s because I have 11 days left before they put me under the knife and pull this 10 pound baby out of me (doctors have indeed measured and it’s going to be at least 9 if not 10 pounds).

    And yes, just you wait. I had my first child at 27. This is now my 4th and I’m 35….NO NO NO plans on having any others, but I can tell you it does get harder as you get older. The good news, every previously pregnant woman, and currently pregnant woman, is feeling your pain with you. There is a reason you get the question “how are you doing?” with a pained expression on those women’s faces as you get closer…..they know, they feel your pain…the only little glimmer of hope I have is that my pain is (finally) almost over. You’ll get there and then you can tell other women:

    Just you wait.

  • http://mommablogsalot.com Jen E @ mommablogsalot

    It’s so fun being pregnant at the same time as you – it’s like reading my own thoughts much better written – and since you are a few weeks ahead of me, sometimes it’s like looking into a crystal ball of my immediate future. :)

    I am on the short end of the spectrum, i.e. showing a lot (and a lot sooner than I did with my first) but I’m actually losing weight, which is really puzzling to me.

  • Beth

    I can tell you that birth the second time around was much easier…. 10 minutes of pushing versus 2.5 hours for the first! I’ll keep my fingers crossed that you have a similar experience. I must say – you look great in your pictures- I know everything is relative, but truly you do. Best Wishes.

  • http://datingisweird.com Serial

    I love the pill

    I love the pill

    I love the pill

    I’m sorry, miracle schmiracle. I know someday I’ll probably do that, too, and yes, life is a great mystery and motherhood is amazing, blah blah blah. It is still WEIRD that another person grows INSIDE your body. Weird. Weird. Weird.

  • http://heylady.net trish

    I don’t know if I should jump my husband’s bones asap or start taking two birth control pills every morning. Decisions, decisions.

  • http://moumou.ca/ Becca

    I tell my guy friend he waddles… then he found out his back is all messed from sitting at a computer too long. Ladies are so cute when they waddle (while pregnant)! Maybe it would be easier to just get a wheel chair?

  • http://theduchessofearl.blogspot.com/ Rachelle

    Waddling is good. Do it a little faster and it’s considered speed walking, and Laura should approve of that! You look great for half way through your second pg. As long as you steer clear of the ice cream….That’s what did it for me and why 4 years after my 2nd daughter, I’m still able to caress my pg belly!

  • http://uncouthheathen.com uncouthheathen

    I’d like to know what Daddy Scratches (#1) means by “*extremely* pregnant.” Is that a sport, extreme pregnancy?

  • http://mylifeinthenuthouse.blogspot.com Erin

    I am pregnant too (almost 27 weeks) but unlike you, I am short. On a good day I am 5’4″ but during pregnancy I am lucky to hit the 5′ mark. So my waddling starts early, and the pregnancy lasts FOREVER!! Tell me…is it May yet?

  • Kate

    So glad to hear you say this, because it rings so true with me. I’m prenant with my 2nd, so you’d think I’d be comforted as my body changes (read: turns into a beached whale) in knowing that yes, the weight will come off later and things will (mostly) go back to normal. But somehow experience is not helping me here – I still feel weirdly panicked about the fact that my body likes to begin the baby-growing process starting in my butt and thighs. Doesn’t it know that my belly is where that baby’s supposed to be cooking?
    Also, for those of us pregnant ladies out here who can’t *help* but compare ourselves physically to your bump watch pics, thank you, thank you for reminding us that you are (a) very tall, and (b) naturally thin.

  • http://aws-wendy.blogspot.com/ Wendy

    Now that you are expecting #2, are you stopping your monthly letters to Leta? Or are you going to be writing TWO monthly letters. You are amazing in those, and I miss them, but I cannot imagine trying to summon up two of those every month.

    Speaking of waddling – just point your toes slightly IN and it will help.