• A H.I.T.

    Wow. This is the first time the comments are still open by the time I’ve read this.

    Like always, this post was hysterical. I can picture Coco’s face when she realized she safely made it to Leta’s chair in time. Phew!

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/tal-tal/ taltal
  • Cheri

    I have two pugs that think we starve them to death. They will stand beside the chair and keep their eyes on the floor for crumbs of any sort. I guess it doesn’t help that my fiance is a very sloppy eater.

  • http://www.mindofmelis.blog.com Melis

    Dooce I love you. You have made a otherwise crap-a-licious day better with your words. Thank you.

  • http://www.thelaughingstork.com Candy

    Never utter the words “Cinnamon Toast Crunch” to a 19-week-pregnant lady. Now I must battle rush-hour traffic to hit the grocery store and grab me a box. Or five. Mmmmmm.

  • http://www.mommyx.squarespace.com Mommy X

    Regarding your gorgeous skee ball photograph…we have a family restaurant in our area that has a vintage arcade upstairs for the kiddies. Two push pops end up costing us $10 after 175 tickets are collected. But the hour to have dinner alone with my husband is soooo worth it. I LOVE your photography!!

  • Anonymous

    I was hoping that this was about how your floors always look HAIRLESS in the photos…

  • http://www.laurelhermanson.com Laurel

    I don’t know how people with kids can possibly live without a canine vacuum cleaner. Our dog LICKS the floor clean.

  • http://www.sneathenfamily.blogspot.com Michelle S

    I often tell people that a dog is a must with a baby, they clean up all that food that flies off of the highchair, and you won’t have to clean it up, ever.

  • Eve

    Thanks for making me smile…

  • Anonymous

    We have the same kind of floor cleaner. He’s camped out under our youngest’s chair for all of his nine years. Great post, Dooce.

  • http://www.foodshethought.blogspot.com Liz

    I am relatively new to your blog, however am as big a fan of blogs in general as I am of dogs in general. In the history of all blogging….


  • Beatrix

    sweet post

  • http://www.leashwecando.com Amy


    My dog sits under my chair. I guess I’m just a sloppy eater…

    She never herds, except during storms. She runs from room to room (if we’re not in the same room) and seems to be worried that if there’s a crack of thunder, one of us may have disappeared. She likes us both to be sitting on the couch where she can watch us at the same time. And if there’s a loud crack, then she can sit on both of our laps at the same time (she’s 50lbs, not so much a lap dog).

    It’s a bit ridiculous, but she’s generally so independent, that it’s almost nice in that sick “you need me” kind of way…

  • http://www.janetnelson.net Janet

    Do you not have a Roomba? Tho I imagine if you did, with Coco, it may not last too long.

  • http://lemondroppie.blogspot.com Ginny Marie

    Now I want a dog. Almost. Wait…I have a Dustbuster! Never mind.

  • http://www.waddledee.net Hanna

    Our dogs do the same, but with my husband-to-be as he spills like a 4-year-old.

  • http://shawnacameron.etsy.com Shawna

    Hm. I notice you say you go “upstairs” for breakfast and it makes me wonder, do you sleep in the basement or are the main living spaces of your house on the second floor and the bedrooms on the first? If the latter, I’m curious how well that works for you, because I’ve considered building a house that way but have been told it’s too unusual for the area in terms of resale. I’ve always liked the idea though…

    (Sorry if you’ve described your layout before and I missed it.)

  • Anonymous

    DOOCE! Chuck is on http://ihasahotdog.com/!!! I love it!

  • http://www.emmylu.com/blog Bethany at Emmy Lu

    Dogs…… Don’t you just love them (in a YOU MAKE ME CRAZY, but I can’t imagine life without your shedding, pooping, psycho tendencies, and loyal companionship)?!!?? I swear, my yellow lab Emmy is cut from the same mold as Coco. It’s freakish to read about her antics, and identify so entirely.

    Haven’t commented before, so I might as well just tack on a few more thoughts…. I appreciate your open, fresh and honest point of view. You are an exceptionally talented writer, and I can’t get enough of your brand of humor. Leta is adorable, Chuck is hilarious and oh, so talented, your style is impeccable, you looking stunning as a expecting mother, and you have single-handedly made me consider the reality that having children will make me temporarily insane, but bring more joy and growth than imaginable… all that and more! Cheers!

  • http://www.survivethemayhem.com SAHM: Surviving Assorted Home Mayhem

    Just wanted to say love what you used for the masthead/banner this month–gotta love it when readers give you such GREAT material to work with!!

  • Anonymous

    I saw that Stephanie Klein is on a panel at SXSW. Are you going to be there?

  • Anonymous

    My mom has a CAT vacuum that tries to eat both food and non-food objects (like twist-ties) that she finds on the floor. Only problem is that she sometimes takes the pieces of food she finds and bats them around the house instead of eating them.

  • http://friedokra4me.blogspot.com Megan (FriedOkra)

    Had to be one of my Top 10 favorite posts of yours since I’ve been reading. So funny!

  • http://www.lifedelicious.net MamaCass

    This is hysterical. We had two dogs when my first was born, and somehow, we are now down to no dogs and two kids…which means the floor is ALWAYS a mess, and there is no one to clean it up. Oh, I miss them.

  • Jenn

    Love it! Made my day!

  • http://paqueenie.com Queenie

    I love this post so much. More, more …

  • http://chamomile-tea.blogspot.com Kim

    Ah yes, the Hoover dog. We have a couple of those. Also good for pre-rinsing the dishes.

  • http://thaxtonfam.blogspot.com Hokie Deb

    –>Our two labs sleep in a bed at the foot of ours and if we roll over too loudly in the early hours of the morning, she is up, running around on the hardwood floors making all sorts of grunting, sneezing, throat clearing noises that I get up (if my husband doesn’t) to let her out. I have mastered laying perfectly still to trick her into going back to sleep.
    Despite what I want I think the dog clearly has me trained.


  • http://hereandeverythinginit.com Katherine
  • http://perfectlydisheveled.com J-Ko

    Sweet story. I need a dog for those very same reasons…. and because my toddler throws his cheerios to the floor as if there is a dog to lick them up!

  • http://www.luckymountainhome.com/ Breckenridge

    It is tougher with cats; they seat and check. All. Individual. Bite. They create you feel like you are willfully craving them to death, only for the heck of it.

  • http://chunkil123.tistory.com 쵸이스박

    안녕 하세요????
    우연찮게 웹사이트를 검색하던 도중 세계에서 가장 영향력 있는 블로그를
    접하게 되엇는데 궁금하기도 해서 한번 방문 해보앗습니다…
    비록 영어라서 소통은 불가능 하지만 그래도 아주 휼륭하다는 느낌입니다…
    당신은 아주 휼륭한 블로깅입니다^^

  • Chrissy

    I love this post!! So freaking cute!

  • http://www.zelzee.com/ zelzee

    Dogs are a great way to keep your floor clean…………….

    So are crawling babies……………

  • Sara in Nebraska

    That was a freaking GREAT post! And I vote for the picture of customer service for next year’s calendar.

  • http://www.whenpigsfly.squarespace.com Jen

    This happens at my house but the dogs sit underneath the husband. He’s quite good at dropping food.

  • http://www.mochadad.com Mocha Dad

    I used to slide my cat across the floor to tidy up, until my wife found out. My wife protested more than the cat did. In fact, he seemed to like it.

  • http://lylelife.blogspot.com Lisa

    I always tell my friends everyone should register for a dog when they have kids. Without a dog, I can’t even begin to imagine how much more vaccuuming I would do.

  • frida

    Please save Oreo!!Oreo has 6 days left to live! Euthanasia date: 2009-03-09 Reason for euthanasia: Space

    Breed: American Staffordshire Terrier
    Age: Young adult
    Gender: Female
    Size: Medium
    altered, housebroken,

    Shelter: Escalon Animal Shelter
    25100 E. River Rd.
    Escalon, CA

    More about Oreo:

    This is my dogs sister, someone save her.

  • LIesel

    Oh. My. Gosh. I laughed so hard tears were streaming down my face. Thank you for sharing so clearly. I could picture the whole thing in my head. We have three dogs (no kids, yet) and I can totally relate. Hysterical!

  • http://www.goodmenbook.org Thomas Matlack

    “There is no more important question at this moment in history–with markets collapsing, corruption rampant, two foreign wars, environmental disaster at hand, and the fabric of the American family disintegrating–than what it means to be a “good” man. The conventional wisdom is that men don’t like to talk about their interior lives. But James Houghton and I have come to the conclusion, after running a venture capital firm together for a decade, that conventional wisdom is wrong and that men are desperate to tell their stories and hear how other men have met the challenges of our time.
    We have collected a cross-section of men–black, white, brown, gay, straight, rich, poor, liberal, conservative in small towns and big cities–to help us look at this issue by writing about a moment that shaped them as a man. We have a drug lord who spent 15 years in Sing Sing and the US Noble Laureate; a football Hall-of-Famer and a Russian Kick-Boxer; a sniper scout in Iraq and the best known war photo journalist covering that war; drug addicts and stay-at-home dads. We have Pulitzer prize winners (Charlie LeDuff), Golden Globe winners (Matt Weiner) and just regular guys–fathers, sons, husbands–grappling with what the hell to do as a man when the world is falling apart around them and what, in the end, really is important.
    At the center of our project are our website, http://www.goodmenbook.org and the forthcoming book “More Than a Few Good Men.” The goal of these print and electronic forums is to begin a national discussion amongst men. To that end we are kicking off a national Essay contest March 1 (which runs through May). At a time of darkness, this is a unique opportunity, in our minds, for a reassessment and a new perspective on the part of men in our country.
    Our mission is modeled after Newman’s Own. The Good Men Foundation will support men and boys at-risk across America. All proceeds from our book, magazine and merchandise go to the foundation. All copyrights are owned by GMF.”

  • http://contentcreation.com.au/packages.html cheap content writers

    That is the funniest thing I have seen in a very long time. Thank you! Brilliant!

  • http://www.foodvigilante.com/fv/ Food Vigilante

    My five month old Beagle spends most her day perusing the floor for droppings. I have three boys who unwittingly feed her quite well. Who needs a vacuum? HA!



  • Littlemamma

    My laugh for the day! Good luck on your book tour, I can’t wait to pick up a copy!

  • Littlemamma

    My laugh for the day! Good luck on your book tour, I can’t wait to pick up a copy!

  • http://www.LightBeyondTheVeil.com Aliya

    OMG, that is funny. Maybe I’m behind the blog times, but I just found you through Daddy Scratches, who I found through Pioneer Woman, and I have checked out a few other blogs here and there, but they don’t all speak to me. This dog story strikes a funny bone in me, because we have 3 dogs, 2 cats, and a bird. They rule our lives, my life would be so much easier if I didn’t have my animals, but alas, I love them, and wouldn’t know what to do with-out them. Besides, I don’t have to clean my floor, not for food anyway, only for hair…
    ;o) Thanks for the laughs!


  • http://www.consejosnaturales.com Cristian

    I dont know if could be healthy for animals.

  • http://www.joysinmylife.blogspot.com Heather

    Just wanted to let you know that I saw you on the Today Show this morning. You were great. I’ll be looking for your book.

  • Anonymous

    Shopping and Info had something on dogs the other day which was pretty interesting. http://www.shoppingandinfo.com