• jen

    I usually don’t comment, but when I was reading this, I realized that there were only 26 comments, so it seemed like I should.

    Congratulations on both being 26, and also on Marlo’s birth and life!

  • Anonymous

    I hate to sound redundant. But instead of running around screaming “Number 26 bitches!” Screaming “I beat Soledad” is far more awesome! Like many, I remember your interview with her.

    You rock! Happy birthday. You have been giving me my daily dooce dose for 7 years now!

  • All in jest

    you know how, in an exorcism, the possessed flinch at water?
    cause the devil doesn’t like water
    ever wonder about coco?
    just sayin’…

  • http://tiffs-snippet.blogspot.com/ Tiffany

    At least it wasn’t poo or vomit…

  • Kate

    Newly pregnant, I think of you often, how alike we are, not that you’d know anything about that, wishing you were really my BFF, and that I could come crawling to you to ask all the questions I have that I wish you could answer, and this was just what I needed: a classic, indooced belly laugh. xo and a happy, happy to you!

  • RobinM

    I love you.

  • Liesel

    Only you. Only you could make me laugh so hard right here in my kitchen all by myself while my own no-brained animals bounce themselves off the handle of my back door to be let in. Only you.

    Congrats and happy happy birthday you funny, funny woman. Also, influential.

  • http://www.gregandlori.com Indiana Lori

    And this is exactly why you are 26. You are the Every Woman. You take our lives, paint it in words until we pee our pants laughing, and remind us that WE are NOT ALONE. We may be covered in breast milk, animal excrement, and some part of last night’s dinner that came out of the mouth of our children…BUT, we are not alone.

    For you, we are very grateful. Happy Birthday. And congratulations. 26 is proof the world hasn’t gone completely insane.

    Indiana Lori

  • Aggie

    I just howled in my ‘office’ and by office, read: cubicle-with-a-sliding-door-but-walls-don’t-go-all-the-way-up-to-the-ceiling-so-people-can-hear-me-howling-to-myself kind of office.

    That was such a great post, Heather! Congratulations, number Twenty-effing-six! And Belated Happy Barfday!

  • http://www.moderngeartv.com Tamara from ModernGearTV

    Oh, the visuals!!! Congratulations on…ALL OF IT!! Happy birthday to you.


  • Anonymous

    2 things:

    1. congrats on 26.
    2. why do you keep that damn dog? i don’t know how you do it and then you go and add a newborn to the household! you are definitely number 1 on the I AM CRAZY TO KEEP THIS DAMN DOG list.

  • Jennifer

    Bravo! But, you’re number 26? Nobody’s supposed to run away from 26! You’re highly influential–doesn’t Coco know that yet?

  • Anonymous

    You’re hysterical, I love it!! Congrats on the 26!! I read the article and the list, and I think maybe you could’ve been a little higher up! :)

  • http://www.rya-west.blogspot.com Heather G

    So don’t I feel like an ass. I am actually embarrassed to admit out loud that I emailed you – number 26 on The Most Influential Women in Media as noted by Forbes magazine – to ask if you had any advice on how to make my lame ass mom blog more popular. Hell, I should have just called up Oprah, like “Yo Oprah can you swing by my ranch tract home in Indianapolis to walk me through the fine details on how I can do this whole ‘best life’ thing? Ill make snacks.”

    I guess I should have realized that I was reaching when I saw the clips of you on various TELEVISION shows (um Oprah and Today Show) but nope – still typed it up all jolly with emphasis on thoughtfully witty and hit send. It took this to make me realize that I was a tard.

    Really though, that’s pretty fucking spectacular and its even better that you follow up the news with vivid details on poop, urine and partially nude dog washing. And that is exactly how you make a mom-blog popular. Congrats.

  • http://www.thegorenablog.com Stephanie

    Not sure if I’ve ever laughed harder. Congrats to #26!!!

  • http://eviljulie.com Julie

    And it’s this kind of post exactly that keeps me coming back for more. Which I guess means that it’s this kind of post that makes you 26, bitches!!!

  • Michelle B.

    You Deserve. Your blog is the best. Happy Birthday

  • http://stellalind.wordpress.com/ StellasMama

    Happy Birthday and Congratulations # 26!!!

  • Anonymous

    Oh my god. I have had almost the exact same morning a few months back. But mine was a dog covered in poop. Runny poop. Sadly I am number nothin’. lol

  • joy

    I have been reading your site for over half a decade now and I am thrilled for your success. Congrats!

  • http://www.popmommy.com Pam

    Congrats and Happy Birthday. You are an inspiration to me and a lot of other women blogging out there. Enjoy this amazing time in your life!

  • http://www.echristopherclark.com E. Christopher Clark

    I’m hoping that, by waiting a few extra minutes to comment, I will be number twenty-six.

    No? Darn…

    Thanks for the awesome story. Wow. That actually kinda turned my day around.

    And made me not want to ever own a dog.

  • Jenny

    Many congratulations Heather! You deserve it.

  • http://hagendaze.blogspot.com/ Carrie

    Congratulations! You are hilarious…26 in pee covered shirt and all!

  • Jennifer

    Best. Post. EVER.

  • http://www.exschutz.blogspot.com ExSchutz

    Amazing! Congratulations! You totally deserve it.

  • JBird

    Fantistico! #26 on #34 birthday, you young pup. Dogs, shit, kids, piss, boobs, love it. Thanks for making the mundane seem exhilarating. It certainly makes life more interesting! If only we all had your gift of descriptiveness, our lives may be “happenin’” at best.


  • Meg

    You really do have a unique voice. No one does it quite like you! I’ve always enjoyed your writing style and think you do an amazing job at this thing called blogging. Congratulations and happy birthday!

  • Danielle

    Ok, so I just laughed so hard, I actually bounced off my stool.

    And almost landed on my dog.

  • Katie

    Oh no! I sympathize, despite being a dog trainer and vet tech and KNOWING how stupid I was being, I adopted a border collie puppy while pregnant. I am regretting it. Anyway, just wanted to say that if it happens again you should have her urine checked, fluffy female dogs are prone to bladder infections, a main symptom of which is leaking urine or having accidents.

  • Ange

    ha ha ha ha ha! Ho ho ho ho, ha ha ha ha! I can’t stop laughing. ha ha ha ha!

    I’m both mortified and have the utmost EMPATHY for you!!

    But before all that laughter/empathy came, I wished you an awesome birthday. And for what it’s worth I think you’re WAY more influential in my life than Oprah or any other woman on that list.

    Kudos to you #26.

  • http://musicgoesforever.blogspot.com Eddie

    You rock, Heather!

  • jo

    Congrats!! But seriously, Anne Coulture? Your father doesn’t have hate and bile for this hate and bile filled wing nut?

  • Liesel

    Also, am dying, DYING, for the second half of the birth story. I, who am terrified of anything having to do with Pain, childbirth much included, NEED to read the second half. When you get a chance, of course.

  • http://www.happinessontap.com Elizabeth_K

    Even as the rest of us worship and adore you with no hesitation, Coco is working full time to KEEP IT REAL. You can thank her later (as the rest of us laugh until we gasp …)

  • http://catutes.blogspot.com Catutes

    Awesome birthday present. You most certainly deserve to be on that list.

    As for the Coco piss? it could have been dog shit she let loose with and rolled around in as a special birthday present just for you.

    Happy Birthday

    And thanks for the laughs.

  • http://truebeautyinsideandout.blogspot.com R. Wallis @ True Beauty

    Wow! Wow! Wow! I’m headed over to the article asap!!! Congrats Heather!

    I likened myself to you….well except for the liberal nature and the decision to endure natural childbirth….So, Maybe I’ll make it to Forbes one day when I single handedly reform our nation’s health care system or maybe even for my blogging scrumptiousness or for my superwoman skills….Just take your pick :)


  • Julie

    Happy birthday and congrats on being #26!

  • Pam

    I love it! Thanks for making me smile today.

    Congrats on being #26 and getting old along with the rest of us.

  • Jessica Hayes

    Number 26-you are f’in AWESOME! I adore you, your website and your family. I hope that you have already ordered yourself a t-shirt with a giant number 26 on it to wear around town. How do all those dooce hater jackasses feel now hmmmmm? NUMBER 26 you a**holes! Go dooce!!!

  • http://chunklight.blogspot.com/2009/04/vacillating-on-vaccinations.html JRB

    Happy birthday! and congrats on #26!!

    In my humble experience, the new carpet gods (which, incidentally, is dogs spelled backward) always demand a sacrificial offering.

  • Helen

    LOL!!! happy birthday 26!

  • Anonymous

    It makes me have hope for everything that you are more influential than Ann Coulter. According to Forbes, not Utne Reader or something. That is so good.

    Your friend,

    Dewey Gigolo (my new capcha tag!)

  • http://musicgoesforever.blogspot.com Eddie

    You rock, Heather!

  • http://cynthiahee.blogspot.com cynthia

    Congratulations Heather! I’m very happy for you, and you totally deserve the number twenty six alright! I’ve been a silent reader all this while, your blog is one of the best I’ve come across. Do keep up the good work!

    p/s: perhaps you would like to change your site name to http://www.dooce26.com? =P

  • http://not-so-deepthoughts78.blogspot.com/ Melinda

    Congratulations. Personally I think you deserve to be much higher on that list, but 26 is pretty awesome. Good luck with the dog pee clean up. I recall a day shortly after getting my dog that he had diarrhea in his crate overnight. It was a horror.

  • Danielle

    Oh, and commenter #310 (eejm):

    I sincerely hope so, dear. ‘Cause the alternative is just too scary to ponder.

  • Angelina

    I nearly peed myself reading this (from laughter). Great story.

  • http://misstraceynolan.blogspot.com misstraceynolan

    Suggestion for the Dooce gift shop:

    T-shirt reading “Twenty-six, bitches!” with a faux milk stain under the left boob.

    Congrats. You deserve all of the honours they can throw at you!

  • JC

    Hey now….what’s wrong with Forbes? I read it, and I read you too, and shit…you are YOUNGER than I am!!!

    Crap, I need to get a life.

    Happy Birthday, and congrats on the Forbes mention.