• Pammer

    “…Powered by douchebags”

    Awesome.

  • Indigo

    The asshattedness of some of humanity just never ceases to amaze me. A-M-A-Z-E-S ME! Who raised these people?? Anywho, get off with your bad self – more power to you.

  • JMB

    I LOVE IT! Every time I find a comment that makes me roll my eyes or giggle, I have been clicking an ad. Brilliant way for more income for you, to share the hate and to make the people who enjoy reading anything that comes from you smile.

  • Anonymous

    Woman with shingles tired of explaining what shingles is. – The Onion

  • Sarah

    Heathers, you are brilliant. I salute you both.

  • tracey

    Sorry about the shingles..not only the pain but your arms are going to get a work out because if it was me I would be breastfeeding that baby at arms length if possible , anything to keep the shingles away! My little one (well, Ok she is 13, but she is little) is home today and I have been following her around with clorox wipes, disenfecting and at the same time giving her things to drink and feeling her head. AND when I picked up her homework, her cranky ass teacher told me to keep her home another day since “there is swine flu out there you know” NO, I didn’t know, thanks for telling me..
    sorry. I love your blog, and will probably NOT read the hate mail daily since it is too MEAN.

  • Jamie

    I’m very sorry you have SHINGLES! but I positively adore the new page. It gives me a place to visit for the sole purpose of mocking the stupidity of others.

  • http://37pence.org Lauren

    Good idea :) .

    Also, the most recent one is so idiotic it’s hilarious! What kind of hater is pathetic enough to add blogs they hate to their google reader??

  • Vanessa

    Reading your blog has helped to motivate me to start writing again, to start therapy again, to start being an active participant in my life again.

    I will be clicking on the ads on your hate page all the time – at least once on every ad on the page for every new douchey comment. I hope you make a buttload of money.

  • Anonymous

    HILARIOUS! Hope you make some serious cash.

  • Autumn

    Hey Heather, long time listener first time caller. I read some of the hate mail, and I think overwhelmingly, most of them seem to need a thesaurus and maybe a hug. I love LOVE your blog, and I can relate to about 98% of what you say, of course the other 2% makes me so violently angry that I write you anonymous hate mail from my basement.

  • Sabrina

    When you posted about the twenty four dollar mascara, I wanted to buy it. I couldn’t at the time, but it looked great on you.

  • Anonymous

    Jesus I think Michelle Rebeiro Yoakum Mcbee wants to be you. She’s an addict, she has boycotted and unfollowed you so much, but still finds the need to comment on and read your blog…..not obessessed or jealous at all! I sick of reading her crap please dont post anymore. I’ll write hate mail just to not have to read her idiotic rants from a woman who has a degree in writing and apparently is pissed she cant get anyone to read her blog and make money from the degree she wasted 4 years to get.

    HA!

  • http://therestlessmama.blogspot.com Restless Mama

    Aaaaaaaaaaaand….you’re brilliant.

    I shall now check out Monetizing the Hate.

    Oh and did I already mention that you’re effing brilliant? Well you and your asshead are.

    P.S. Sorry about your SHINGLES! Ick and uncomfortable. God speed woman. God speed.

  • http://habitual.wordpress.com CreatureofHabit

    HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT.

    I made it 2 pages into the hate and can not believe what I’m reading. I mean, first of all – that people actually take the time to write something like that and fire it off rather than, oh – I dunno, MOVE ALONG. And second of all, that you get so much of it!? WTF?

    I have to say, good for you for being clever enough to turn it into a positive *claps hands*. And also – if you were my sister and I knew you were getting hate mail like that I turn full-on vigilante. I just can’t stand it. Lucky for all those haters you’re not my sister….

  • Stephanie

    Brilliant use of ignorance, stupidity and cruelty. You should have done this a long time ago!

    For whatever my 1 millionth comment is worth I really enjoy reading your blog, looking at the photographs and seeing what you’re into this week (style-wise that is).

    As for the shingles, I had them when I was 6 months pregnant with my daughter…two days after I had a scorched myself in the sun. It felt like someone was beating me with a hammer! I was unable to take anything for it.

    I hope you do get the medications and that Marlo comes out of this without chicken pox.

    Speedy Recovery! hee hee

    (p.s. I tried to post this from my phone and the capthca didn’t work)

  • trixienmojosmamma

    i am going to presume (please do correct me if i’m wrong) that the content of those ads (anxiety medication, constipation remedies, etc.) are entirely the product of the machine-generated ad purchase program. interestingly enough most of these products would cure the ailments the authors of the hate suffer from…

    way to monetize baby. both those heathers are fuckin great.

  • http://www.infrared.chrisandrach.co.uk/ Rachel

    I never normally post but those comments make me so angry, I’m so sad there are people like that out there and that they are obviously so unhappy. I know you don’t need to be told this but you have a beautiful family.

  • http://www.semisanemom.com Brandon

    Brilliant idea, although I am sorry that you had to think of it in the first place. I know another blogger who gets a lot of hate mail. I am positive she’ll be copying this idea — if she hasn’t already!

  • Kate

    What can I do to help you make MORE money from the Hate page? Just view it? Click lots of ads? I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of sticking it to the haters. I hope you rake it in, baby!

  • Anonymous

    I AM ABOUT AS POLAR OPPOSITE FROM YOU GUYS AS ONE CAN BE…..EXCEPT THAT I AM SOUTHERN BAPTIST INSTEAD OF EX-MORMON!!!!!!!!! I ENJOY YOUR BLOG, EVEN THOUGH I DON’T LIKE THE F-WORD. DON’T REALLY GIVE A RAT’S ASS ABOUT WHAT OR HOW YOU AND YOUR FAMILY DO OR MAKE A LIVING…IT’S YOUR LIFE, NOT MINE. i JUST ENJOY READING ABOUT IT! AND I LOVE THE MONETIZE IDEA. SORRY ABOUT THE SHINGLES….HOPE DONNY DOESN’T GET THEM.
    PS. YOUR GIRLS ARE BEAUTIFUL, EVEN IF THEIR DAD IS GAY!(SORRY COULDN’T RESIST THAT BIT OF SARCASM)

  • Yan

    i love the monetizing the hate, as a suggestion, maybe you could give a portion of the proceeds that you make off of that site to a charity (taking something negative and doing some good) and that portion should be publicly proclaimed on that site on a monthly basis. it would certainly fuck with the haters when they see how much you are able to make off of their spewing. knowing that you are only declaring on the site the portion you give to charity and not the part that you keep for the kids’ education (or whatever) would be a further knife in the back. obviously i have a diabolical side.

  • http://www.jenepting.com Jen

    What the what. Who ARE these sad people that say such terrible things? Has no one heard of the ol’ “if you don’t have anything nice to say…”?

    Hey crazies, take a freaking chill pill. And instead of ragging on a blog that YOU CHOSE TO GO TO, do something else with your energy.

    Sheesh.

  • Maggie

    Hahaha I think this new idea is going to make haters’ heads explode! They are so miserable that they have to hate on you…but then you stand to make money off their comments. Brilliant.

    Also, I don’t *GET* haters…seriously, after what I just read on Monetizing the Hate…I am an intelligent & well-educated person, and I cannot, for the life of me, wrap my head around someone who actually wastes precious time in their day to compose a hate email or comment. And of course I don’t understand where they come up with some of the shit they say, but geesh, there are a LOT of crazy, miserable people out there, I guess. I think I should feel lucky that I don’t understand, though, because it means I’m not crazy or miserable…or downright rude! I’m sur 98% of them would NEVER say any of that stuff to your face. Not sure why they think the internet is an excuse to be rude & crazy. Anyway, I digress, great idea…hopefully someday they will get it and take their crazy elsewhere.

  • http://www.thechroniclesofnicole.blogspot.com/ Nicole

    Oh, I’m sorry! Get better soon and I hope that your precious little baby doesn’t get the chicken pox. The video however..I could have done without.

  • Kelsey

    That page made me so sad – why do people feel like they can speak to you like that? I’m thankful that you open your life to the world. Your kids are ADORABLE, your dogs hilarious, your husband so fun…keep up the good work. Your blog makes me smile, which these days is not a common emotion for me.

  • http://fullcontactfatherhood.com Playstead

    This is awesome. I get tons of mail with every article I write. Some are negative and I know I’ve won once they’ve burned enough of their day to go over two paragraphs. The death threats are super as well.

  • http://luvtoscrapbook.blogspot.com Stacy

    You keep on doing what you are doing. You make me laugh out loud. I lost my mother 2 weeks ago after a short battle with liver cancer. I never imagine losing my mother before I turned 40. So I guess my message to all of the assheads is get a grip and don’t take things so serious. Life is too short to be uptight all of the time.

  • Shannon

    First of all, shingles suck. I’ve never had them but I worked for a family physician and I’ve had to work with patients who had them and I just felt sorry for them.

    Second, that monetize the hate mail thing rocks!

  • Anonymous

    I’m shocked at how many hate messages you get and just how awful they are. I will never understand why people simply don’t UNFOLLOW. Why do they feel the need to go all potty mouth on you and drag your family through the gutter? How does that make them better than you? I find your blog entertaining and I guess I just want to say, thanks for enduring those awful messages of hate so those of us who do enjoy your writing can continue to FOLLOW.

  • Gravis

    Great riposte to the hate mailers to bring attention to their comments and let the readers decide. Based on what you’ve written and the comments you’ve received, I’d definitely say the balance of looney goes down on their side, by far. Also, good job of staying (mostly) above their level.

    This was the first time I’ve been compelled to comment that I’ve actually followed through. Always refreshing and entertaining.

    Thank you.

  • http://onein36million.wordpress.com Melanie

    TEGADERM, woman! TEGADERM!

    In case your doctor hasn’t told you this, step one. Cover the shingles with antiviral cream. It doesn’t go into your bloodstream. And if you’ve got the rash already the oral stuff won’t do shit for you. The cream will at least minimize the chance of infection (which is pretty low, unless you let Marlo lick the rash). Then cover the rash with Tegaderm bandages. They’re a bitch to get on without them folding and sticking to themselves, but they cover the rash nicely. Change’em daily, you’ll be exuding a disgusting grossness from the rash.

    I speak from experience. When my son was three months old and I was in the horrid depths of depression I felt funny-odd little bumps on my neck and shoulder. Just couldn’t stop ‘feeling’ at them. Then I noticed the pattern and scooted to the doctor – I knew it was Shingles.

    I feel for you. Shingles sucks.

  • http://prairieopolis.com Ann Foley

    You’re scary smart and my hero. Except that you have terrible luck (Shingles!). Hope you’re feeling better soon & hope you make a mint from all the hate. Oh, and Australian Shepherds should only live on farms in Australia.

  • http://www.kristinwalldesigns.com Kristin

    You rawk!

  • Diane

    Oh Heather,

    Yes, a great idea about making money from the pond scum, but jeeeeez, reading that crap all the time would be hard to take. I felt like another poster who said it made her feel sad to read it. It is incredibly mean-spirted. People can be so KRUELLL.

    Shingles, a friend of mine had it the summer before last. It hurt just to look at her. She still has some ongoing nerve damage. And by coincidence, my Doctor just mentioned to me last week that I should get a Shingles shot to prevent getting it. The fact that you have it and my friend had it makes me think it is not so rare. I will be calling my Doctor tomorrow.

    Sorry sweetie for all the horrible verbal abuse that comes your way. Yucky…it made me cringe.

  • http://meanderingramblings.wordpress.com/ Lanny

    Heather, I’ve read here for years, but never commented, but this made me want to – you are a genius! I think that your sense of humour & attitude is more British because everyone I know in the UK who reads you loves you & totally gets your sense of humour. Keep it up!

  • Linsey

    LOVE.THIS.SO.MUCH.

    I got chicken pox when I was 5 & still have a teeny scar above my left eyebrow. Also, my parents have an Australian Shepherd/Golden Retriever mix and I want to send him to a farm everysingledayofmylife and I don’t even live at home anymore. But everytime I call home to say hello to Mom & Dad GUESS WHAT I HEAR BARKING IN THE BACKGROUND!?!?!? GUESS!

    Many of times I have yelled “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” to my mom but she knows that I am directing it at the stupid dog. Our other dog, however, is perfect and I love him forever (he is a retriever/lab mix) and he is beautiful and quiet and I love him.

    PS. SHINGLES!?

  • http://www.littlebabyfeet.com Sarah

    sorry about your shingles and hate mail, although it’s glorious to make money off of complete assholes. and bitches, too.

    thought you might be interested in this: picked up my new copy of today’s parent magazine – your book is listed under the Then & Now section of the magazine, as in 1984 the “must read for moms to be” was What to expect when you’re expecting, and in 2009 it’s your book. Although they didnt even use your name – just (honest musings from a popular blogger)

  • Nicole M.

    I just have to tell you how much me and my family love you and all of your thoughts that you put out there. You are hilarious, your family is adorable, and when I was reading this on my phone, I clicked on the Dressing Room picture and my 14 month old daughter said “Ooooooohhhhhh” very lovingly and kissed the screen. Forget the haters!! You have lots of people that love you! Ü

  • Kelly

    I read all the haters words and wanted to vomit. I do not understand people who enjoy hating. Who enjoy wishing harm on others. Who can’t wait for Leta to grow up and read this blog and become traumatized. YOU people are the fucked up people, not Heather and Jon.

    Do you haters not understand that Heather is letting you into a GLIMPSE of her life. This blog isn’t her Dear Diary. This isn’t a moment by moment account of her life. She writes a little something that happened for a moment on one day of her life and oh, guess what. She uses comic relief alot of the time. And sarcasm.

    You haters are far too stupid to understand sarcasm. You want love and sunshine every moment of her life. That isn’t real. Maybe Susie Sunshine Blogger writes like that. Go read her. If you don’t like the way Dooce writes, DON’T READ HER.

    If you don’t like what’s on channel 2, change the channel. If you hate Scrubs do you continue to watch it week after week?

    What the fuck is wrong with you??? You hate her. We get it. You don’t like her blog. We get it. Yet you come back again and again. You read it just so you can write how much you hate it. You are the ones with the problems. YOU are the ones in desperate need of psychiatric help.

    I’ll say this again, Heather is offering us a glimpse into her life. We have no idea how she spends the 24 hours a day she has with her family. Somehow you have it in your mind that she is ignoring her family. Because she has pictures of her sitting at a computer. Oh no! I’m at a computer right now. You are at a computer when you are spewing your hatred. Who is watching your children when you are doing that???

    I’m not happy about writing this message. I don’t like hate. I don’t like confrontation. I don’t like negativity. But what you people are doing is so over the top, I felt like I had to say something. I’m not naive enough to think this with make on iota of a difference to you. You are haters and you get off on the hating. You will continue, it makes you happy. Because YOU are the ones that are sick. I hope you get help. I really do.

  • Kris

    I think you are hysterically funny and tell it like it is! Keep writing and ignore the bullshit!

  • kaptaink

    I just read your new hate mail site. Whoa. Some people are really weird. And just a little bit scary.

  • http://www.starvingartistink.com erin

    ‘powered by douchebags’
    oh god.. favourite favourite little part. haaaaa. so much goodness. can’t believe you kept it all to yourself.

  • Hoosiermama

    I’m betting most of those emailers were in Washington last weekend.

  • http://meanderingramblings.wordpress.com/ Lanny

    Oh, and I just clicked on your ad’s about 50 times – hope you make tonnes of money!

  • Jasmine

    Oh Heather, love you a thousand times over. ‘Powered by Douchebags’. Nearly died of giggles. You roll nude and shingle-filled all OVER that money.

  • mich`

    I SERIOUSLY LOVE YOU.

  • http://canadianna.wordpress.com Angela

    You smell like poo.

    (Okay, not really, I just thought I’d do my part for The Page.)

    Oh, and Australian Shepherds should live only on farms. Australian ones. With sheep.

    Anonymous

  • Amy

    This is brilliant. For one thing, it really does put the hateful things people say in perspective for the rest of the blogging world. So way to go on helping others feel better about any nastiness directed at *them*! For another thing, I’m truly fascinated by the fact that those who seem to hate you SO VERY MUCH just keep coming back to comment again, and again, and again, and again…. Amazing.

    And I had SHINGLES last spring! On my face! And my doctor diagnosed it pretty much the same way (walked into the room, took one look at me and said, “Hey, you have shingles!”). My own case was all very uneventful and unpainful actually, since I caught it so early and the antivirals kicked in so fast. But you have my sympathy.

  • Lisa in Seattle

    Shingles suck the big one. But the hate mail page? Pure freaking genius! It will be on constant refresh, over here.