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M and M

This is my niece Meredith holding Marlo on Thanksgiving. Twice that day as I was calling after Marlo I stumbled through several names trying to find the right one: Mariah (my sister’s oldest daughter), Meredith, McKenzie, and Mom. I finally gave up and just yelled, “BOBO!”


I should probably be more embarrassed than I actually am to admit this, but we didn’t stop using a baby monitor with Leta until she was almost five years old. And even then we only stopped because her twin cousins had come over, spotted it next to her bed, picked it up and began shouting, [...]

Chew on Life’s Big Questions

To say that I was flattered to be asked to write the introduction to the Love, Sex & Relationships section of Rainn Wilson’s book SoulPancake: Chew on Life’s Big Questions would be a horrible understatement, especially since I’m in there with the likes of Amy Sedaris, David Lynch, and Justin Vernon of Bon Iver. The [...]

The bribe that never loses its edge

Leta let me curl her hair for the first time on Thanksgiving. It wasn’t the specialness of the occasion or the fact that many of her cousins would be dressed up, too. No, she let me do it because I gave her a bowl of M&M’s to eat while I did it.

The dooce® Xbox Live Second Chance Giveaway

Jon was fiddling with our xBox yesterday when he found this video of Chuck and Coco on the hard drive. I’d always wondered what their voices sounded like. We tried for hours to decipher what Coco was saying, and if you slow it down and play it backwards it goes: WORSHIP SATAN. WORSHIP SATAN. So [...]

They found Jimmy Hoffa

My mother watching over Jon as he carved one of the turkeys on Thanksgiving. This was only his second time ever attempting such a feat which you would not be able to guess by the expression on my mother’s face.

Who, us?

There’s vomit beside your bed? Whatever are you talking about? One of us would have vomited on your bed.

Would sir desire a patty cake?

I imagine that this exact scenario plays out in many homes between siblings who are closer in age than Leta and Marlo. Or perhaps between friends after midnight in bars across the country.

Giving thanks

I gave up trying to get a decent picture of both kids together because Marlo is in a cannibalistic mood this morning, but I did snap this distinct photo of Leta’s profile, about 98% Armstrong. She’s home for the next five days, and I’m thankful that she’s at an age where she can help with [...]

Small Business Saturday

I try not to make a habit of talking about advertisers here, but American Express is a longtime advertiser on dooce®, and they asked me to let you know about a good cause.  It’s called Small Business Saturday, a way to support local small businesses. Our personal favorite in the Salt Lake City area is [...]