• BornInaZoo

    “my fame is so minuscule in comparison to actual celebrity”

    What’s the name of your head shrink?

  • Angelamermaid

    I signed up for an account just to tell you how full of awesome this post is. Fuck the haters. I appreciate that you’ve always been honest about how imperfect you are and I am inspired by how you forge ahead anyways.

  • JudithNYC

    “Fuck them. Fuck all of them. People will use the fact that I am saying this as proof that I’m having a meltdown, and those people can go fuck themselves, too.”

    THIS!!!! And remember, for every hater there is at least a dozen of us rooting for you.

  • Hollywould51

    Good for you, I am the same way and admire you I hope I can work on this myself and stop letting people use and abuse me and just basically saying pls. sir can I have some more? Keep up the good work and I hope I can someday say that sentence to some of the people who have done me wrong in the past and whom i’ve never stuck up for myself to.

  • belinda

    Hell yeah! Screw them, the miserable gits. My mum has always said to me, ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’ but sometimes you have to, and this was one of those times. Well done x

    P.S. The weather is warming up in London, come visit!

  • mama without instructions

    fuck them all, indeed! i rarely comment but i simply can’t believe/fathom/stand the nasty bullshit hate that people spew online and rooting for someone to fall apart is unconscionable. i’m glad you are feeling powerful and standing up for yourself. take care and don’t be afraid to show your power!

  • The Dalai Mama

    I have been reading your blog for a very long time (about 7 years now) and all I have to say is YES!!! Way to go!!!

    I bet it feels awfully freeing to finally tell them all where to go.

    What a break through. I don’t understand why society has a hard time accepting a strong woman’s opinion or any woman’s opinion for that matter (as men decide on my reproductive choices). But I am glad that you have taken the stand. It just goes to show your strength.

  • tinahignite

    In all the years that I’ve been reading your blog, I have never felt compelled to leave a comment, until now. I just want you to know that I’m proud of you.

  • RoseTattoo

    I love you.

  • sasssykat

    To hell with the haters Heather! Keep on rocking in the free world lady!

  • Natalie

    I seriously want to chest bump you right now. FUCK THEM ALL. I hope they step on a lego. Each and every one of them.

  • Tara Boom

    That’s a huge step and I’m so proud of you. When you’re unsure of what to do, just think of the advice you’d give Leta or Marlo if they were in the same situation and take then act accordingly.

    “You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”
    ~The Buddha

  • StefanieLCR

    Fuckity Fuck, Fuck, Fuck YEAH!!!!!! You tell those cunty bitch faces to lick your big ass furry balls, son!

    - Said, former preacher’s kid (so you know I mean it! ::wink::)

  • katiemaedays


  • gavintiegirl

    And this is why I LOVE YOU! The world is filled with mean, evil, jealous haters. Please know, as I am sure you already do, that for every hater, there are 10 lovers! That sounds dirty and nasty, but you know what I mean. YOU FUCKING ROCK! There’s a foul mouth for ya!

  • Brittanysco

    I’ve been reading your blog for a few months and I didn’t have an account yet. However, after reading this post, I simply had to get one so that I could say FUCK YES, YOU GO GIRL. You are a bad ass and an inspiration. LAWD YES! I can’t believe that people would say mean things about you, but unfortunately the nature of the internet lends itself to being a safe place for spineless bullies. Well, it’s also a place for awesome people to get together and soak up each other’s awesomeness. So the bullies can suck it!

  • ladygray

    YES! YES! YES!

    i’m proud of you. well done!

  • Cosmo3807

    Just wanted to add my high-five to the rest of ‘em! Yay Heather!

  • heatherannehogan

    I’ve been reading your blog for seven years, but this is the first time I’ve ever commented. I just want to high five you and stand beside you in solidarity. You have literally changed my life with your candor and strength and sense of humor. Fuck the haters. Nothing they write is motivated out of love or compassion or empathy or anything more than petty mean-spiritedness. Your legacy is the opposite of theirs. For starters, because you have a legacy. Their voices are the ephemera of troll moans everywhere. So fuck ‘em.

  • Kristyne

    I heart you! I’m normally afraid of people who are as … how did you put it? … abrasive, polarizing and dirty-mouthed as you. I’m normally a chicken in real life. And I’d rather die than risk any sort of confrontation. But I’ve let my fear of other people get in my way for waaaaaay to long now. Like you, I’ve had a recent breakthrough in this department. Know what? Not only did the earth NOT swallow me whole, but I’m enjoying an unexpected sense of confidence, pride and freedom. I get it.

    No one puts Baby in the corner!!! LOL!

    (What? Too corny?)

    Keep that razor sharp chin “that can slice meat” up. Kay?

  • luv and kiwi

    Well technically there is a hair shot in your post so you’re not completely off the subject at “head”.

    Good for you! No feeding the negativity beasts! They’re plump enough!

  • bunny

    I have read you for ages, ever since someone on Metafilter linked to you getting, um, dooced.

    I have pulled for you as you fought your personal demons…I have enjoyed seeing pics of your precious daughters and your hilarious dogs.

    But, as someone who made a fool of herself online a decade ago while in the grip of some contrary brain chemicals, please don’t take this as a dis:

    You need to step back a bit. This is your business, this is how you put food on the table, take care of your children, but most of all, this is a very very VERY public platform in a media that never forgets.

    Yep. The internet never forgets.

    I don’t know you, all I know is what you and Jon post about your lives. But reading between the lines and with my own online experience as a guide?

    Please, hon, with all that is in me I plead, step back from the keyboard. Or if you must post something, I’m sure Chuck would look adorable with a pancake on his head.

    And, if you really need to delete this, it’s okay, as long as you read it first. Because what I type is out of care and out of concern, as a long time reader.

  • jessilee

    I had to do the whole “I forgot my password” thing to comment. I’ve been watching this..waiting trying to figure out how to help. It seemed that standing on the internet shaking my fist yelling “don’t talk about her that way! She’s a person!” would be highly ineffective. When you said “fuck you” on twitter, I wanted to high five you and share a pint of icecream.

    This, this here is perfect. Good for you. You are not a rug. You are a strong powerful woman making hard decisions. Fuck them.

    Now we need to discuss kleenex, ice cream, and terrible 80′s movies. That’s how all my friends and I deal with these kinds of situations. I may live 1000 miles away, but I’m sure Cami would be happy to fill in for this complete stranger!

  • devoyka

    Do not read those petty (and honestly, crazy) fuckers. Unread words have no power. Tree falls, no one hears/sees – never fell.
    Don’t read them, don’t mention them and they do not exit.
    You actually have this power.
    Keep on keeping on, Heather.
    Millions of us are cheering for you.

  • Regency Romantic

    Doing a little moonwalking for you myownself!
    MY therapist MADE me practice saying “Fuck that noise” and “Bite my shiny metal ass” for thinking/saying at the appropriate time. Yay for you!

  • Layna Lee

    Funny…you grow your hair out for a change when life is changing itself beyond your control and I got and chop mine off.

    I am having the same growth in the therapy department. My therapist hugged me and said, “You’re done. I have no more to offer you. You offer me more than I do you now.” It only took years and years and then 8 months after leaving an abusive relationship to realize that damn it, I can stand up for myself, stand on my own and make it. I feel like throwing my hat up in the air ala Mary Tyler Moore, but alas, I don’t own a single hat.

    You go girl.

  • Kam904s

    See, I was wondering if you were waiting on putting a kibosh on the hate so you could open another “Monetize The Hate” page and give the proceeds to the Mom charity. It’d be a gracious way to tell ‘em to go fuck themselves.

  • k3llyroo

    I’m not reading all the billion comments but I think the issue is that people want to be entertained by you and the “brand” of entertainment you’re offering right now isn’t quite what is anticipated and they are flipping their shizz like a kid that’s overdue for a nap. I know you just look at it as your life, but for everyone else it’s another fun blip in the day that they like to read. Imagine turning on Entertainment Tonight and they’re just showing sad pictures and no celebrities? WTF?!Right? I can see both sides. It probably feels disingenuous to write about poop and farts right now, but at the same time it’s hard to read posts that have nothing to do with you. Maybe you can have some guest posts while you clear your head? Sometimes taking a break applies professionally as well as personally.

  • OrangeLily

    Awesome, good for you.

    I can’t believe that there are “strangers who are publicly delighting in my pain, strangers who are actively rooting for me to break down”. No matter who’s at fault/not at fault/what’s happening/blah-blah-blah, to delight in anyone’s personal suffering is down-right mean-spirited – and not condoned by any religion.

    Totally get this paragraph:
    “At the core of the work that I have been doing is letting go of the fear of standing up for myself. That probably seems asinine because my writing can be abrasive and polarizing, and how can a woman with a mouth as dirty as mine have any trouble standing up for herself? Well, a lot of trouble, actually. Especially in person.”

    I’m happy for your epiphany. And you’re picture looks great, dare I say promising and hopeful, too.

  • BrandyOSU

    “Haters gonna hate”. But a big Internet high five (and a hug) to you. It’s amazing to me how shitty people can be. Fuck ‘em all.

  • Linda_M

    Cheering quietly for you, and for every woman who’s found herself in a similar situation, although most of us do it without the notoriety. (I totally had to go look up how to spell “notoriety”. See? You’re good for my vocabulary, too!)

  • raymilauren

    It’s pure unadulterated jealousy. You ARE famous so this is why they delight in it, and your accessibility is a golden lasso whip of relief for these disgusting people. I just experienced an entire forum dedicated to hating on me and my life and they brought you in to it as I had made an attempt to reach out to you. You’re a success and now your dark place times is riveting for those with emptiness, much emptiness in their lives and you’re a dream specimen. The things they say, are not real things and they have blinders for sharing any joy or victory or anything positive that you have accomplished because they will never get what you have or enjoy life as much as you do. You’re incredible BYE!

  • lisdom

    love. this. post.

  • cinrose22

    What the hell is going on with people? Everyone is being so mean. Jen @ “Jen” e sais quoi is getting beaten up too (as is her autistic son). I don’t get it. WTF is wrong with them? Why do people have to push people down to feel better about themselves? I work at a high school and there has been a wave of spitefulness and bullying like we’ve never seen before. Is there something in the water? Is the world tilting off it’s axis? I cannot figure it out. “You is kind, you are smart, you is important”. Just keep repeating that because you are! We need you. Hugs and love.

  • Rachaeljoy

    oh gosh, I haven’t checked your blog in a while, and I haven’t seen any mention of it anywhere else lately.. maybe I follow the wrong sites? Anyway I only popped in because I was lured by the promise of a hair pic. I am now amused, No hate! Just hair! hahaha. [I am seriously in need of a hair make over so all things hair interest me, currently!]

    -You’re doing fine, too, rawr!!

  • imjazzer

    Keep on keepin’ on, Heather. You have what they don’t, pure and simple–and by that I don’t mean web traffic. You have taste, integrity, humility, an incredible finesse with words, and a kick-ass sense of humor. As my my mom’s coffee mug once said: “Don’t let the turkeys get you down.”