Welcome to Armstrong Inn, part three
Last week my friend Anna Beth flew in from Louisiana to help me put the finishing touches on the guest room. We spent a couple of days driving around like crazy looking for some final pieces, and she may or may not have referred to it out loud as a "wild dooce chase" and I may or may not have spit into her breakfast cereal. She's laughing because she doesn't eat breakfast cereal, and I'm laughing because breakfast cereal is a code word for something else.
AHH KNOOOOWWW.
I always feel sorry for anyone who is around when Anna Beth and I are hanging out because the cacophony of Southern quacking that comes out of our faces could melt the paint off of a car parked a hundred yards away. I can't help it, her accent brings out every molecule of Southern in me and next thing you know IRON has one syllable and TOUR has four.
Like I said before, I asked Anna Beth for her help with this project because everything she touches turns into fun. I told her I wanted a room that both women and men would feel comfortable in, but that above all else it had to have a tiny bit of whimsy. Is that term overused in interior design? Probably. Is this look on my face indicative that I don't give a shit? Definitely.
So. Here is a mood board of the ideas we both agreed on:
Basically, we (meaning she) wanted to go for a balanced mixture of textures: wood, cotton, leather, and cowhide. There are two tones of wood in the room, both light and dark, and the contrast represents the masculine and feminine mood we were going for. That mood is also represented in the color scheme, one that is mostly neutral with a few dashes of bright color thrown in. What you don't see are the touches of convenience that you guys suggested (mirror, towels, subscription to Playboy, lube, etc.). Those come in the final reveal.
One tricky part of the room that Anna Beth had a brilliant idea to overcome is the wall of windows. They aren't centered. Wah, wahhhhh. Ah know. Could it be any worse than off-centered windows? You'll show up to sleep at my house and be all, THAT'S IT, ARMSTRONG. Not only did I stick you in a room where the windows are all wonky, but I didn't even put a lemon in your sweet tea. UNFOLLOW.
Solution: we ordered a whole bunch of really affordable fabric and had drapes made that line the whole wall, from ceiling to floor. It not only disguises that problem, it adds a depth and warmth that I don't think we could have achieved any other way. And you guys, IT IS INCREDIBLE. When Leta saw the room after the drapes were installed she declared, "I don't care what you say, Mom, I'm moving in here."
……..
This post is brought to you by IKEA and THIS IS THE OFFICIAL DISCLOSURE, WHAT UP, FTC!
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FM Living
kristanhoffman said:
Well if it's Leta-approved, then I'm definitely looking forward to the final reveal. :)
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02.29.12 - 10:18 AM / 1kristanhoffman said:
WHOA was I really first?! Been reading for 5 years now and that's never happened! WAHOO! It's a LEAP DAY MIRACLE!
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02.29.12 - 10:19 AM / 2katrins said:
I can't believe you've tantalized us in this manner and then NOT GIVEN US A PHOTO OF WORK IN PROGRESS. I mean really, Heather.
I'm a mother and a full time writer, and I read only two blogs religiously (busy, busy, you know the deal!) and Dooce is one of them. Your willingness to share your opinions is admirable, courageous, instructive and inspiring. Thank you for all your incredibly hard work. I'm also wishing you only the very best in your family life. XO www.katrinschumann.com
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02.29.12 - 10:23 AM / 3dooce said:
@katrins thank you. That means a lot, and I really needed that this morning.
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02.29.12 - 10:27 AM / 4exante said:
So. I'm not saying I get down in every guest room me+bf sleep in, but it happens. And when that happens, I always like it when the guest room trash can has a lid on it, so you can't see what sort of tawdry things I've discarded. I am just saying.
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02.29.12 - 10:44 AM / 5katalia said:
I can't wait to see the full reveal! So exciting.
I also wanted to let you know that you were featured in one of my dreams last night ... I ran into you at a party someone was having, and we had a raucous time, and a good chat. I have no idea where the dream came from except for the fact that I am a dedicated reader.
Happy Hump/Leap Day!
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02.29.12 - 10:51 AM / 6Janie T said:
Yay! Can't wait to see it. Loved the video. Oh, and the part about the lidded trashcan (this means you, exante) ewwwwww!
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02.29.12 - 11:03 AM / 7hala said:
Love this project! Can't wait for the end-result.
Adding my voice to katrins - have been reading you for many years now and you have inspired me to be more honest/genuine/authentic in my own voice and life. Wishing you and your family the very best, always.
Thank you for showing us a little more of our own selves every time you open up and share more of yours.
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02.29.12 - 11:19 AM / 8Kpengell said:
Please tell me more about the wall art! I have been searching searching searching for a piece to go above my couch and want to see where this came from!
I want to hang out with you and Anna Beth, as whenever I'm around southern women I tend to absorb their accents. Much more melodious than my Michigan accent!
Looking forward to the full reveal. Always LOVE your rooms.
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02.29.12 - 11:23 AM / 9Caren Lynn Cross said:
All I can say is the final reveal better involve video. And it better have Tyrant in it. Can't get enough of your Southern accent. Thanks for sharing!
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02.29.12 - 11:25 AM / 10kaethend said:
We have a house on the central CA coast that needs decoratin'. I'd like to hire AB, but only if she comes with you.
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02.29.12 - 11:25 AM / 11Sabine said:
Yay! I can't wait for the big reveal of the Leta-approved room!
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02.29.12 - 11:28 AM / 12momof8 said:
Ah wanna seeeee!
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02.29.12 - 11:35 AM / 13kraftykaela said:
I LOVE this whole series on decorating your dream guest room. SUCH a great idea!
I also love your Cami style posts, and your Chuck posts, and everything else you post, just for the record...
You're hilarious no matter what, and even when you're being serious and obviously having a hard time, you're still an excellent writer, and I love to read your interpretations of things, even if they aren't comical.
I'm so glad your writing/storytelling here brings you joy, and I hope you continue to do so for as many years as you are able, no matter how much negativity you receive from all those booger heads who are obviously whining about your blog from their mother's basement. :D
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02.29.12 - 12:08 PM / 14Maria E B said:
You just made me say "Tooo-uhhh--errr" and "AHHRNN" out loud at my desk and now people are looking at me. The audacity on you.
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02.29.12 - 12:09 PM / 15makfan said:
Ha ha, I was going to comment about AHHRNN and TOUHER too.
I haven't said anything much about your personal situation. I do hope that it resolves in a positive way for everyone, and I'm sorry y'all are going through this. I respect all of you and hope for the best.
Love all the guest room ideas - I am going to adopt some of them around here.
And oh yeah, Tyrant plays for my team, and he is HAWT.
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02.29.12 - 12:32 PM / 16specialkrispy said:
I can't wait to see it! I love the idea of curtains on the whole wall, centered windows or not. AND, I bought that same fabric with the dandelions in green (haven't done anything with it yet). Samesies!
I hope things are getting better for you.
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02.29.12 - 12:33 PM / 17luv and kiwi said:
Ahhhh! I need pictures! It boggles my brain how you guys can just create and decorate and know...Can you tell I suck at that stuff? The next time you're in LA Heather I wouldn't mind your Southern cacaphony coming over and assessing my digs.
Sheesh I need to get with the creative program!
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02.29.12 - 12:41 PM / 18Kirsey said:
Is most of that IKEA? I love the side table bench, that is adorable. Will you have links to these things in the final post? LOVE it so far!
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02.29.12 - 12:58 PM / 19dooce said:
@kraftykaela thank you. Means so much.
@Kirsey yes, I'll have a source list after the reveal!
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02.29.12 - 01:07 PM / 20tallnoe said:
Pins and needles here... PINS AND NEEDLES.
Okay, fine. I can wait.
Barely.
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02.29.12 - 01:45 PM / 21LDD said:
What?! You're nearly finished with the room? That is some Mormon-esque efficiency...but I guess my frame of reference is ME, who takes forever to make decisions on decorating.
I have so enjoyed this series...its been fun to watch unfold. Fantastic project!
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02.29.12 - 02:02 PM / 22filmlady said:
There's no way around it....
I'm lichen it!
BTW, you're doing great. Just in case you weren't sure.
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02.29.12 - 02:22 PM / 23SushiForBaby said:
Loving how its coming together and that you're making it a fun project for yourself!! You are, as always, amazing.
Looking forward to the final reveal and coming to Salt Lake for the first time to stay over. Leta and I can snuggle.
Just kidding, I'll kick her out first.
Just kidding, Mormons scare me. I'll enjoy the post from my sunny window in California.
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02.29.12 - 02:23 PM / 24Midnight said:
I just had to sound out how tour could be three syllables. Thank goodness I went to college in Virginia and can translate English to Southern! Still working on the one syllable version of iron, though.
I'd be in favor of the work in progress photos too, just for the record.
The mood board for the room looks terrific and I can't wait to see how it turns out.
However things work out, I hope you and Jon each find peace and joy in your lives and with your children.
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02.29.12 - 02:24 PM / 25tinacolada97 said:
the curtain fabric with the dandelion print on it? I made a skirt out of that exact same fabric (except it was black flowers on khaki instead of blue on white). Mad-Men-esque...
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02.29.12 - 03:34 PM / 26ladygray said:
HEATHER! when are we SEEING this ROOM?! (EXCITEMENT yelling, not, you know, the mean kind.)
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02.29.12 - 03:36 PM / 27Mama Kat said:
I love the direction we're going with this...however when I stay with you I'd really appreciate an adult version of one of these in the room: http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/categories/depar...
I don't see why IKEA can't make that happen.
Also? I had no idea you had an accent until I saw your last "ahh knoowww" video. It's like...I never really knew you. How can this be?
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02.29.12 - 03:38 PM / 28Becky Cochrane said:
Smart idea with the curtains. Years ago, a friend's parents did something similar in her basement bedroom and made the entire room look bigger and airier.
You know what Bono would say: Don't let the bastards grind you down.
In fact, I dedicate that entire song to you for as long as you need it.
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02.29.12 - 07:04 PM / 29KMTBERRY said:
One thing I always appreciate in a guest room is a few BOOKS. FOr if you can't sleep because you have jet lag, but you don't want to go barging around the house looking for a book. (It's also a good place to put book-overflow if you have that problem!)
ALso, It is nice to have a QUILT. Folded up somewhere or on the bed.
a VISIBLE electric outlet is always nice, too.
(Is that a FUTON on the bed? SURELY NOT! I bet it is a featherbed, right? You wouldn't make your guests sleep on a futon!)
Also, I TOO think you rule and are BRAVE and AWESOME. And CLEAN! So CLEAN! You are the VALEDICTORIAN of CLEANLINESS!
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02.29.12 - 08:23 PM / 30