• Daffodil Campbell

    I have always liked the name Phineas.

  • pdxhadey

    I was going to say Sushi, but since I see that has already been taken, I’m going to have to go with Billy Ocean.

  • Scarlet

    My next fish is going to be named “Burp”. I’ve had this plan for about 5 years and have yet to buy a fish, so perhaps Leta would like to borrow it?

    It seems wrong to let such a great name go to waste!

  • prestonk9

    Sasha Fierce.

  • SeattleSue

    Gotta go with Beethoven.

  • Lraryee

    tortuga (Turtle in Spain), skilpad (turtle in Afrikaans), honu (turtle in New Zealand), Turtle (turtle in USA) or You can just name him BOB.

  • newburycottage



  • Cellar Mouse

    How about Alpha? Alpha the beta fish. Come on… Or there is always Delta. So many connections there.

  • Woon




  • The Baker Bee

    I had a Beta named Finnegan (Fin for short, of course) that lived for SIX YEARS. That’s a long time for a fish. When Fin died he was replace by Gilligan. Gill only lived for two years. Fin was obviously way cooler.

  • mfm

    What about Lavender? or Prince?

    Although “Turtle” as suggested by literarygirl might be the winner.

  • rebelmeyer

    A friend of mine once had a betta fish named Gorton. It was a perfectly hilarious name. He was my God-fish. (We were in college and drunk half the time.)


  • utahbeach

    How about “Betty”?

  • lemming

    Ruby Gloom?

  • smodan

    Gingersnap! Oh, snap!

  • rubyshoes

    A few years ago, my husband had a strong yearning to get a fish and name him Chaz. He was a bit disappointed to find out that the fish we picked out was female (not sure how you tell, with a fish).
    So we changed her name to Chazmina.

  • _justme_

    I have had quite a few fish in my life. A few of my favorite names have been:

    Lord Fishington, Colonel Mustachio, Fat Bastard, Fishy Smalls, Goldie Spawn and Leonardo DeCaviar.

  • apatten77

    My daughter received two beta fish for her fifth birthday. She was on a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory kick at that time; thus Charlie Bucket and Violet Beauregard were named. Charlie met an untimely death by overfeeding under the supervision of her grandfather, but Violet lived a long and happy life (for a beta fish anyway).

  • Aunt Baaa

    Ours (a Christmas gift from our accountant) was named Sushi. You know, to be ironic.

  • maureenp

    Thog or Jurgle?

  • aheinzer

    Fertilizer. You can call him “Fert” for short.

  • katybetz

    She looks like a *Rosie* to me :)

  • monkeysmom1

    When I was teaching, my friend, also a teacher, wanted to get a Betta fish for her classroom. So off we went to the pet store. She called hers Simon. Of course being at the pet store, I ended up getting one too. I called it Garfunkel. Simon and Garfunkel would ‘write letters’ to each other, and the kids loved it. When Garfunkel died, I got another Betta and called it Garfunkel Jr. So, my vote is to keep the tradition alive, and call it Garfunkel!

  • acm

    I’m not so sure that *all* pets must be held — my daughter is a frog fiend, and we have become owners of a pair of aquatic froglets that are to watch, about like fish, but strangely satisfying (and also with a 5-20-year lifespan THANK YOU GRANDMA). Anyway, with 20 years to think about it, she could work UP to touching and then holding it….

    Or not. Heh.

  • HI-D

    My college boyfriend had a fish named Fishstick.

  • poet

    Translation of this post: Look over here, guys, while I distract you with this SHINY FISH!

    Heather doesn’t care what you think she should name the fish.

    I’m officially done. This is my adios, Heather. There was a time when I defended you, when I enjoyed your site, but I realize now that “dooce”, for me, has become synonymous with “Kardashian”: a whole lotta nothing wrapped in money, and a great show if you like petulant tantrums.

    Name the fish after the lawyer you have on speed dial.

    Or maybe name it after yourself: Bully.

    Isn’t that what that “B” stands for, Heather?

    You are a vicious bitch and an insufferable bully, and shame on anyone who teaches their kids that bullying is bad but defends Heather Armstrong.

    Heather is a bully.

    A BULLY.

    She is the Regina George of the internet; she is a mean girl.

    Oh, but we were talking about a fish.

    I hope you find your peace, Heather, I really do. My 28-year-old self wants it for you, because my 33-year-old self thinks you’re an asshole.

    So I hope you find that peace. But you’re not going to find it on the Internet.

  • merri

    Beethoven the Betta Fish

    Or something else that celebrates Leta’s piano playing skills with the new adventure of owning a fish!

  • LuckIsMyMiddleName

    Mortimer. Or, if Leta decides he’s a girl fish, Persephone.

  • jessie.whittle

    I think I would have to name it Turtle or Myrtle since you originally set out to get a turtle.

  • forkyshauna

    I’m leaning toward Gill or Pearl. Although Finn is nice, too. My daughter did a science project on Siamese Fighting Fish, and they really do fight to the death [no, this was not part of the experiment]. So don’t put two males together in the same tank. For fun, put a mirror up to little Gill. He’ll entertain you for hours.

  • Meriadoc Brandybuck

    Congrats on the new edition! ‘Frodo’is a cute name for a fish.

  • alanmill

    Wanda–duh. As in “A Fish Called Wanda”–funniest movie ever!

  • joyluck76

    Surely someone has already suggested Abraham – Arnold’s fish from Different Strokes. That’s my vote. :)

  • AnneWF

    Looks like a Mel to me.

  • valkok

    When I was in college, I had a goldfish named Spasmotic Intentions (no, I wasn’t on drugs). I called him Spas for short.

  • julz1013

    How about Dorie? or Tukie? I once had a goldfish named Rebel because I loved Billy Idol so much. LOL

  • gladcow

    Princess Peach Pescadero

  • gladcow

    or, Maude.

  • dannyva

    Our old beta was Finn, my daughter’s new beta (she’s 4) is Alena. But my friend Ellie had the best beta name of all: Master Beta.

    Okay, perhaps inappropriate for a child’s pet.

  • slh25

    i like “tea song” – like mrs mamabird. I think she is an introvert like me – my brain takes that same roundabout path sometimes – but it makes perfect sense in the end. the only answer possible. Good luck with the new fish, hope it is still doing ok.
    Hope you are doing ok as well.

  • CrisLawson

    Aubergine. Sounds cool, translates as ‘purple,’ and it’s french so that’s neat too.

  • Kelly

    Our Betta’s name is Sonic. As in Sonic the Hedgehog, not the fast-food place with the tiny ice cubes. Everyone told us he’d die within the week, but he’s still kicking 3 years later…

  • Centiemme

    Jimmy. As in Jimmy The Fish. As in “sleeps with the fishes”.

  • Centiemme

    Jimmy. As in Jimmy The Fish. As in “sleeps with the fishes”.

  • ckmh

    I named by first beta – Henry.

    The second was – Henry II.

  • jessiCat

    My A.D.D. kicked in somewhere around the middle of the 4th page, so I haven’t read everyone’s comments. If I’m repeating someone, my bad.

    I say “TACO”. Duh, do you people not read the DoCo shenanigans? :)

    I had one named “Frank” before. Poor Frank, he was my buddy at work and when I left for maternity leave….those bitches let Frank starve to death.

  • gretchie

    T-Bitty, or perhaps Beta T (where T=Turtle)

    Or, to jazz it up a bit, Grand Funk Beta T.

    We could also get all retro and go with BetaMax.

    Then there’s the more worldly Boutros Boutros Beta.

    In conclusion, I cannot exclude Perry the Platypus as a possible name.

    Choose accordingly.

  • deborahjmum

    All these great suggestions — Leta’s job hasn’t really been made any easier; it will be so hard to choose one. I would offer “April May Armstrong” because Leta will always remember the fish’s birthday. Or, if you want to stick with the chicken theme, “Chanticleer”.

  • The Bold Soul

    I had a parakeet named Arnold once, but the moment I saw this fish, I thought “He’s a Leopold”.

    Don’t ask me why. Just intuition. Plus, the chances that you guys actually know anyone named Leopold are slim, so when the fish dies Leta won’t be as traumatized at the thought of flushing him down the toilet.

  • Sassy Granny

    Someone probably already suggested this, but I’m too lazy to read all the comments. I think Finagin is a perfect fishy name. I know…it’s misspelled. Creative license!