From: sassietrousers@yahoo.com
Subject: none

I read some of your website and quite frankly was astonished that you are a person that has had a child at all.....I think some people should just leave such wonderful experiences to those who have the stamina and fibre to do such things!!!

Having a baby is a WONDERFUL experience, down to the labor pains and tearing.....I think by after 7 months you should seriously be over this!!!

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Dooce Note: This email was written entirely in pink.

If there's one thing we all know, it's that I lack fibre. Constipated women just shouldn't have kids. It should be written into the Consitution.

No one told me this experience was supposed to be wonderful!!! I FEEL SO CHEATED!