Meg: There is such a place right next door to Utah. It's called Las Vegas, Nevada.

They are super cute. One might even say ELECTRIC.

Oy.

just noticed someone else used the bad "electric" pun. There are two of us! Eek.

I HATE SHOPPING!!!!!! Especially in any department store, outlet or strip mall. I'd rather die. I'm going to go bang my head on the wall just for thinking about it. AAAHHHHHHHHHH!

DOOCE..... was looking through picture archives and stumbled upon one of Jon with a beard. wow, is all i can say. you are one lucky woman.

*gasp* I know you didn't just say "black-speak".

Fish, sup dawg. Master of all Correctness in da hizhouse. Word.

Fish -
I need to see what the master of witty banter looks like.

Katy: there's pictures of dooce all over this site.

Yours,
The ever humble Fish

Jen wins!

*rockin' a mic like a vandal*

My bf made that same costume from scratch last year, we were a hit. She does have a pretty smile. Remidns me of jenny McCarthy.

I want to know if he was a two-prong or a three-prong.

this was our costume, too! the bottom receptical on the outlet actually has openings for the plug...

Latter Daydar!

HA!

Kudos to Markalope!

(That must be the same feeling I get when I get served in an In-n-Out burger here in the Bay Area. Especially before Christmas.)

There's liquor store I drive by sometimes in Peabody MA called Bunghole Liquors. No kidding

Come on Fish!! Im serious. I want to see you! There are no pics on your blog. I love your writing style and think you're very funny.

i am still puzzled at the "no tea or coffee" thing, so i did a little googling and found this, which was interesting and laughable...

"Hi-I've been trying to find this out for a long time and hopefully you can help. I'm actually related to Bringham Young (as is 1/2 of Utah) but back in the 80's my dad came home from work and said now the mormons can drink Coke because they have bought stock in Coke (or Pepsi). My girlfriend was mormon and her family still is. They all drink coke like there is no tomorrow, but look down at me because I drink Tea. I was just trying to find out why it is ok to drink coke and why can't they drink tea (which is much better for you than coke) Thanks for your help-Eric"

Eric,

It will never make any sense. First off, not all Mormons will drink Coke, but most do. The "law" that drives them is the 89th section of the Doctrine and Covenants which says you can't have "hot drinks."

Well, that usually is interpreted to mean coffee and tea. But what about hot chocolate? They consume great amounts of that.

And can you drink coffee if it is cold?

Or could you not drink Coke if it were heated?

So, like all leagalists, they are left to fret over what "they think it all means."

Hope that helps. Jim

You're all just floundering around the issue. They probably dressed up like that just for the halibut.

Enough with the first comment obsession, people! You're never first when you say you are. (Except for Sven, of course.) But I get a little giggle thinking about the reaction of the "I'm first" person when they see that no, they were not number one after all. It can really mess up your day, huh? :P

On the topic of crazy business names, we have a chain of convenience stores called "Kum and Go". Once, my husband stopped by one in Iowa on a debate trip with a bunch of his high school students, and one of them joined the Kum and Go Milk Club. Much hilarity ensued.

Oooh, I've just noticed (I'm using Mozilla for a change) that everyone has a little number next to their name. I don't get that when I use Explorer.

Okay Fish. I'll stop stalking you. I thought I might get a little nibble on my line but I guess these waters are barren.

She does remind me of the Gentlemen too!!! Also like the niffer the Buffy-longing has started up again here too. *sigh*

Like Meg, I also thought the referral to "blonde outlet" was about a place to get second-quality blondes at low, low prices. Or a blonde outlet as an emotional exercise - like letting your blonde out in the way you release tension or anger.

Maybe I should try to be a little more literal.

As an aside - after watching the I Heart Huckabees preview, I have decided that Dooce and Naomi Watts were separated at birth.

Now back to your regularly scheduled commentary.

i don't know what this says about me, but after reading your title i studied the picture thinking, "hmmm, she looks way more nordstrom than outlet to me."

fuck, i just GOTTA get out of OC.

Whoa. Racy.

When you said she was dressed as an outlet I first thought you were cruelly ridiculing a victim of Mall American.

Fish,
The Pixies *ROCK* I am soooo jealous...

Does Dooce Do the Pixies?

You people are just just the punniest damn people I've ever 'met'...um, read...uh, whatever...

As an aside - because there seem to be a lot of those on this here comments page - does anyone else read Dooce's comment page for its entertainment factor? Or am I alone here? I get all kinds of things from reading the comments - everything from getting to read other interesting and well-written blogs to gagging over sycophantery (is that a word?) to agreeing with my fellow commenters. It's an exercise in online people-watching.

Well?

Im not the only one with "Fish Fever!"

Congrats on the wee one, Fish and Fish's baby momma!

Everyone feel free to engage in free-form fertility dance for the Brumfields.

To the smarty that was making fun of me for posting that I was posting first....

When your day starts off like this:

http://www.dfwls1.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=9672&referrerid=103...

you can get excited about whatever you want! : P back at you!

Anne, I read all of the comments and have found new blogs, great deals and learned a lot too. I wish all blogs were this great.

that is a nice smile. you know, i'm seeing a pattern of nice-looking people in salt lake city. maybe it's just y'all's friends or their friends, or the people you choose to photograph, but they all look friendly and pleasant. did you know that utah has the highest rate of volunteerism in the country?

Sue from Ohio: no. We Wisconsinites are much more into the House of Pain's "Jump Around" than we are into Kriss Kross's "Jump."

I was always having accidents from wearing my snowsuit backwards, anyway.

fo shizzle fish-izzle!
and I'm out dis beeyotch.

one.

christy - maybe naomi watts crossed with elizabeth hurley?

That would be my fault. Annnnd baby daddy can be legal if said baby daddy is married to the baby in question's mamma.

The most wonderful thing happened to my husband and I the other night.

These kids had a blowout in front of our house, and asked to use our phone to call for help.

Kid: "Yo, can I use yo phone I done wrecked my ker."

Me: "Sure, no problem"

Kid: "Tankyou"

Me: "Do you need a jack?"

Kid: "Naw man, I ain't got no tire you know."

Me: "Oh, ok."

Kid on phone now: "Hello Mommy. Can you come pick me up please, I had a blow out. Ok thankyou."

Me: "Did you get a ride then?"

Kid: "Yeah, you know. Thanks and shit." scratches crotch.

I love that damn kid.

Oh, and the few non-blonde women there feel they have to compete with the many real ones, exacerbating the problem.

Fish - and here I thought you must live in SoCal, because there's a gas station/deli in Del Mar called Pump and Munch too... Maybe there's a chain of them? Hard to imagine. Also amusing is the liquor store in La Jolla called Liquor Box.

Amanda B - You (U?) crack my shit up. Keep it real, sista!

TOH gossip for you: I heard that Tom Silva is a total diva. (Say it isn't so!)

I love when all the TOH dorks stand around the table and try to guess what the weird gadget is that they've found.

BEAVER LIQUORS!

I LOVE IT!

go here:

http://www.fuckthesouth.com/

:)

For those who didn't see it posted last night -

http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/12.11/start.html?pg=7

Dooced
Losing your job over something you wrote online. Named after Dooce.com, a blog run by Web developer Heather Armstrong. Armstrong got canned after anonymous critiques of her coworkers were linked to her.

Sorry for my last comment. That horse is now officially dead, too.

Fish, Horse-shizzle! Shizzle is king on dooce.com. For a shitload of puns, have you seen the PoopReport -

http://www.poopreport.com/blog/b2poop.php

Dooce - I think you just need to set up a message board..

Nice picture..

OMG - Check out http://www.poopyjoe.com/poopmachine/index.htm

But don't eat the fruitcake or the tapeworm first - it's frustrating if you haven't hit the "jackpot" yet!

Dooce, when you can't shizzle, maybe you could go to this site and get some pseudo-satisfaction!

Hey wait, is that the problem? Did you eat cement and water at one time?

DoulaBrooke and Sheryl:

No shit! I have a picture I took of Bunghole Liquors, too! My husband and I nearly peed ourselves when we saw it.

Too freakin funny! I just spend about 20 minutes on that site tapeworm. Thanks for the laugh!

Maybe it's just me, but that girl looks totally Mormon. I think it's the blonde hair and the giant, wide-eyed smile.

I think it's fair to say, MamaDooce, that Leta's head will only continue it's current growth rate being that she has two Scottish parents. (i think)

I two am the spawn of Scots and my head is freakish. I am terrified at the thought of giving birth to a child with this DNA.

P.S. Hey! Back off the South. Not all of us are idiots. Some of us smell purty, talk good, and almost ALL of us are strong swimmers.

Michelle: that's amazing! can it be true? Sounds too good...

I know I'm a little late, but...y'all needs be checkin' out Tha Shizzolator:

http://www.asksnoop.com/

Shizzolate that shiznit, yo.

Wait wait. Hold on.

That is so wrong and mean on so many levels.

First of all, you have to score below 75 to be considered MR. Duh. I work with MR people, and they are some of the most sensitive, sweet people ever.

Second- wtf? Making fun of people with low IQ's to make yourself feel better. Come on. So when people with an IQ of average, below average or MR see that they are supposed to in turn find the Democratic party a safe and inviting place?

Way to spread the love.

Aw, I love pictures of Leta-Frong. So sweet.

The Greatest American Hero ended up doing soft porn. Poor bastard. I think it was the leotard.

Whoever asked it earlier, I, too remember Christopher Cross. One of my first 45s was "Think of Laura".

My "baby daddy"...

I swear, I almost threw a boot throught the TV screen when Barak Obama's wife actually said that while introducing him for his election speech. I love him, but she just sounded stupid.

Just what we need... ebonics mixed in with politics. >:|

milhow:

Just because a person possesses a "get out of jail free" card doesn't mean they should use it.

She does have an electric smile!

*groan*

Nice couple costume...and ncie smiles are something to take notice of. :)

i guess she could only turn him on by letting him plug into her... =) cute outfit idea

nice pun alex!

Hallelujah! (or however you spell it it)

Say what you will about Utah... They have definitely got a good-sized supply of freshly-srubbed, large-white-toothed, attractive blonde women out there. I can almost spot an LDS girl. It's a distinctive look kinda like being able to suss out a gay person. Latter Daydar? Well, that and the five kids....

The sex toy shop around the corner from us had couple costumes in the front window: one mannequin had a giant silver screw that protuded from his waist, the other wore a giant nut over his bum. Somehow, that's all I can picture.

He must have been plugged in at some point.

My uncle always referred to electricity as "the juice." Insert your own jokes, please.

How bout this one,Chris: "Betcha he'd like to send 120 volts of juice through her!"

Great smile... nice teeth... :)

Betcha he'd like to "socket" to her.

*crickets*

Okay, I'll stop now.

No offense to anyone here but its hard to hold this in: it's not your "baby daddy" it's the "father of your child"...for christsakes.

Amanda B., you are funny.

thanks for the larfs, Fish!

Now my coffe is done, I've had a chuckle and I'm ready for the day...

She HAS to be an Osmond. No doubt about it.

OMG, Amanda B's comment made me spit my coffee out all over the place. That was a hoot!!!

*thanks and shit*

Wix: My bad. I just saw "nice-looking" and let my anti-cultural- imperialist, self-righteous, dark-skin-loving side go wild. I agree with you that there are a lot of very nice people in Utah. Of course, it's easier when everyone looks like you, thinks like you, votes like you, and believes in the same religion as you. You just assume everyone is as good and great as you are, and treat them accordingly.

Yes. And I mean a 45 and not 7 inch. It's ok, you can say whatever you'd like. It might have something to do with why I was beat up a lot. I also owned the entire George Burns record.

The GAH (weird, those initials sort of sum up one's reaction to remembering having faithfully watched the show) did The Red Shoe Diaries. I guess it's not entirely soft porn, but it's close enough.

Mari ~

The words she used made her sound like a ghetto thug. It's too bad that after all of her education she isn't aware of that.

Just my opinion. (And probably Bill Cosby's too...)

Noooo. I'm too old to keep up with the chat rooms. All you kids will start talking the rolfalamao and the lol and i'll be left to cry alone.

Hey- we're all here talkin it up and Dooce is probably gettin' bearded man love down by the fire. I'm going to watch Reno 911.

P.S. The Greatest American Hero sooo did not to porn of any sort. Stop saying that.

Not so great anymore, eh Amanda B?

Believe it or not
I'm working on porn

I remember GAHero was the first place I had heard the word 'scenario'--in one episode, I swear the old guy said 'scenario' like 1 gazillion times...everytime I here that word now, I think of that show. Weird....

So are Mihow are you 'making', 'researching', 'directing'...what's up with the porn (*)(*) hehehee

LMAO. Dooce, translated by the Shizzolator:

"Yesterday Leta 'n I had a big ass day full of doctor’s appointments 'n cheddar cheese goldfish n' shit. I had scheduled her physical therapy appointment after her first nap 'n her nine-month check-up after her second nap because I wanted her be rested 'n in gravy spirits 'n an izzall around lovely ho, know what I'm sayin'? Yo' ass can do that as a parent, manipulate yo' shorties 'n ensure that they will be on they best behavior, know what I'm sayin'?"

Oh. My. God.

Hier Leta et moi avons eu un grand jour complètement des rendez-vous du docteur et du goldfish de fromage de cheddar. J'avais programmé son rendez-vous physique de thérapie après son premier petit somme et son contrôle de neuf mois après son deuxième petit somme parce que j'ai voulu qu'elle fût reposée et dans de bons spiritueux et tout autour de la belle dame. Vous pouvez faire qu'en tant que parent, manoeuvrez vos enfants et assurez-vous qu'ils seront sur leur meilleur comportement.

Je veux prendre une merde ! Je veux prendre une décharge !

It is verrrrah This American Life if I can be so bold and annoying and lame all at the same time in saying so... love it a whole bunch.

Dooce is very punk rock on the other hand... I
mean that in a very Ramones sort of way... did anybody see "End of the Century"... what a bunch of assholes, well of course, except for Joey ... but punk rock just the same.

Fun convo! I love you Dooce! Can read you on my commute and now post, too, all via the company-issued Crackberry! Photos look great on it too!
One reason technology is good.

For shitzel weiner schnitzel

William Katt played the Greatest American Hero and he did do a movie called "Circuit" that's been reviewed as soft porn. Give's new meaning to "you can be my hero, baby."

http://www.modamag.com/circuit.htm

Naw, Compton... beotch!

I was raised Baptist in the south and that women looks like a bible college student or a youth pator's wife! I also used to work at a photo stock agency and that picture looks like a stock photo. =0) Brought back some memories of my past life!

I'll take it in order:

1) I do know who Christopher Cross is. Apparently, my delightful attempt at clever word-play was just, as the Onion puts it, dumb.

2) I am in no way qualified to moderate anything, and I have a sincere shortfall for the proliferation of word-abbreviations found on internet bulletin boards. As I said above, I am Dumb. I just can't figure that stuff out.

3) That "shizzle-ized" Dooce entry made me pee.

Okay, all caught up? good.