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dooce® - dooce.com

All of this came out of my boobs

We were cleaning out the freezer last week and discovered all this breastmilk I had pumped and stored. Sadly, they were all WAY expired, and we had to throw them out, but my God, will you look at all that? MY BOOBS DID THAT.

Also, this picture features the Dooce Effect because I wanted to give the breastmilk its proper heavenly glow.



11.11.2004 Daily Photo comments closed

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  • dooce said:

    HAHAHAH SUCKERS! I AM THE FIRST COMMENT!

    11.11.04 - 05:34 AM / 1
  • Fish said:

    Dooce, you're just hyper from all that cocaine that's in the picture.

    Oh, wait, That's not Cocaine!

    11.11.04 - 05:35 AM / 2
  • Em said:

    Eeek! From the Boob of Dooce, enough to feed Utah! Do Mormons DO breastmilk? :)

    11.11.04 - 05:36 AM / 3
  • Angie said:

    Ewww... I totally don't want to finish my cappuccino now! No offence or anything, I mean, the human body is an incredible thing, blah, blah, blah.

    Actually, I bet you could sell that on ebay!!!!

    11.11.04 - 05:36 AM / 4
  • Molly said:

    Maybe you can use it for some of your holiday baking this year??

    11.11.04 - 05:37 AM / 5
  • Colleen said:

    wow.. pretty impressive!
    I'm having a flashback to when I was serving on a criminal jury for cocaine possesion. When we went to deliberate, the cocaine was all over the table, just like that, for us 12 angry men and women to touch and pass around. I never saw so much cocaine in my life. Ditto for the breast milk pic of today.

    11.11.04 - 05:39 AM / 6
  • FrenchBenj said:

    Darling, I love you but, as a gay man, all i have to say to that picture is:
    Ewww. Ewww. Ewww.

    11.11.04 - 05:39 AM / 7
  • Michael said:

    Dooce juice.

    11.11.04 - 05:39 AM / 8
  • One Bird said:

    Ok, I really know that your meds are working because you are so calm about the fact that it is all expired. When I was nursing/pumping, if I had one bag of breastmilk that I had to throw away, I would cry for about 2 hours.

    11.11.04 - 05:43 AM / 9
  • Nieuki said:

    My god, do they make special breast milk packs, or are those bags from your beloved Ziploc collection?

    11.11.04 - 05:44 AM / 10
  • taryn said:

    I'm currently breastfeeding and I can definitely appreciate that. Wow!

    11.11.04 - 05:44 AM / 11
  • christy said:

    Did you already throw it away? Breastmilk in the freezer should keep for about six months! Send it to me! I have been pumping at work, and I think the performance anxiety is depleting my supply. Nothing like sitting at your desk on the computer hooked up to the pump like some freakish graphic designer cow.

    11.11.04 - 05:44 AM / 12
  • Fish said:

    What, exactly, would you have done with the breastmilk had it not, sadly, been "WAY expired?"

    11.11.04 - 05:45 AM / 13
  • nadia said:

    ha-ha geez, I'm so not hungry now.

    11.11.04 - 05:45 AM / 14
  • come on said:

    so, how long does it take for frozen breastmilk to expire anyways? (and is anyone else wondering about what appears to be giant LUMPS in that milk?)

    anyways, i'm impressed.

    11.11.04 - 05:46 AM / 15
  • christy said:

    Nieuki - they do make special breast milk bags. You should see all the breast-feeding accessories you can get - it's mind boggling. My favorite is the goofy bra-band thing designed for hands-free pumping. I swear it's the most unattractive device ever designed for the human body.

    11.11.04 - 05:48 AM / 16
  • Chris From Ohio said:

    Suckers. Oh, the puns...

    11.11.04 - 05:48 AM / 17
  • Fish said:

    By the way, dooce, I just read Jon's most recent blurb.

    He's a good guy.

    11.11.04 - 05:49 AM / 18
  • beautifulmess said:

    kind of makes me want to have a baby just so MY boobs can have special powers, too.

    11.11.04 - 05:51 AM / 19
  • sheyna said:

    omg...they look like little bags of crack!

    11.11.04 - 05:51 AM / 20
  • bushra said:

    i don't know which was funnier, the fact that you gazumped people about the first comment, or that you called them suckers...

    as for the picture, i, i don't know what to say.

    11.11.04 - 05:52 AM / 21
  • Chris said:

    Not to get off topic about the breast milk, cause, um...wow, that's a lot of breast milk. But, I too read Jon's post and was unable to comment there so here,I'll say that I second what Fish said. Jon IS a good guy.

    11.11.04 - 05:52 AM / 22
  • sheyna said:

    not that i know what little bags of crack look like.

    11.11.04 - 05:52 AM / 23
  • Jenny said:

    What is so gross about breastmilk? Or is it specifically breastmilk in bags?

    OF FRANCE!!!!

    11.11.04 - 05:54 AM / 24
  • angela marie said:

    But if you heat them up, can a Morman baby drink them? Is it the same as slipping the unsuspecting child hot tea?!?
    Just wonderin'.

    11.11.04 - 05:55 AM / 25
  • Human Writes said:

    All that milk kind of makes me want a bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats.

    11.11.04 - 05:57 AM / 26
  • Fish said:

    re: what to do with old breastmilk: Hollandaise sauce; biscuits & gravy; clam chowder; spackle; deck footings; brick mortar.

    Sorry, my grandparents grew up in the Depression. They never threw anything away.

    11.11.04 - 05:59 AM / 27
  • Liz said:

    Oh...wow. Don't know what else there is to say to THAT.

    11.11.04 - 05:59 AM / 28
  • Sarah said:

    Oh! So sad that's all expired! Breastmilk is like gold! All that time you spent pumping, just to have it go to waste. Bummer. I remember pumping, freezing it, and not ever needing it. But I only threw away like two bags... not as many as you!

    11.11.04 - 06:01 AM / 29
  • dooce said:

    Fish, if they hadn't been WAY expired we would have mixed them vodka and kahlua and enjoyed a bounty of white russians. breast milk is very sweet.

    11.11.04 - 06:01 AM / 30
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