The Kids
You must have a dooce® Community account to leave a comment.
If you've already registered, login.
If this is your first time posting here, snag a free account.
Heather talks about public tantrums (from kids) on today's Momversation.
- RIP Louis Mortimer Armstrong: http://bit.ly/1R4tv6
- Hugs and kisses to you, too! RT: @Monkey_Tree: @dooce he probably committed suicide because he was tired of LISTENING TO YOU WHINE.
- Our fish just died. And I'm sitting here crying. And it wasn't even my fault!
1. PKD said:
There she is! Our cutie pie.
2. lulu cornichon said:
Leta: and-a-one-and-a-two-and-a-ONETWOTHREEFOUR!
Chuck: Pizza? Pizza? Poptarts? No--Pizza!
3. dooce said:
whatever you do Leta, DON'T STOP WAVING THOSE ARMS.
4. Dre said:
Little Miss Leta just gets cuter and cuter every day!
5. Chloe said:
So cute!
I've never been this high on the list before.
I hope you had a nice break from writing yesterday!
6. christy said:
Giddyup!
That reminds me - be sure to have the camera ready for the first time Leta tries to ride Chuck around the room. That's always a classic.
7. Jessica said:
Wouldja look at her shirt?! Leta is the best dressed kid on the internet, and quite possibly all of Utah.
8. Sherri said:
Wait! Is her hair red or brown?
9. Kristina said:
First time commenter, long time reader, Leta is absolutely adoreable!! And I just had to comment, I've never read your comments and been so close to #1!!, normally it's #40 something by the time I read, now I'm #6!
10. Brooke said:
Are those little Equestrian pajamas?
Heather! When Leta's old enough, get her riding lessons! They're so much fun.
11. pismire said:
Is it just me or does Chuck look stuffed?
12. Carolee said:
They are so cute!
And your floor is sooooo shiny! How do you have time to keep the place so clean with a baby. Wow.
13. Sarah said:
Leta is darling!!
Did you ever say what yesterday's pic was?
14. Carolyn J. said:
Your floor is so beautiful, I want to lick it. Also the baby and the dog.
Oh, and most people hate the sound of their recorded voice played back to them,I'm sure you sound normal to everyone else.
15. tangoali said:
Snack-a-licious!
16. brittney said:
No more Caesar hair-do. Tres chic.
17. jenn said:
Aww
I love her horse shirt!!
Jenn
18. sweetney said:
horsies!!! obviously leta will soon need a subscription to Dynomite! magazine for its hot horse poster ackshon.
19. debbie said:
this picture needs more THIGHS!
no, i'm not a perv--just a mother who loves chubby baby thighs.
20. maxigumee said:
Leta's shirt is cute.
21. jenny said:
just wondering... what was yesterday's picture of, exactly?
22. ChickenFlicken said:
A word of irritatingly unsolicited advice....if you ever plan on putting barettes or ponytail holders in Leta's hair to keep in out of her face, you should start NOW getting her used to it. Sure, she'll reach up and snatch whatever you put up there out milliseconds after, but by the time she actually NEEDS to keep her hair out of her face (and trust me when I say, you will want to keep her hair out of her face when she eats or snots or talks or anything else, because otherwise the hair gets stuck to the cheeks and if you think a sockless baby looks neglected, you haven't seen the hair stuck to the face with snot yet...)she will be used to having something ridiculous stuck into her hair. I'm going to send you some hair doodles that I think you'll like.
23. the niffer said:
I have yet to see a photo where Chuck doesn't look like the King of Something. He's no senator, he's royalty.
(Even after he drops a load in someone's yard. King's can poop anywhere.)
24. Grace said:
As always, Leta flapping her arms, and Chuck looking completely distracted. I love those kids :)
25. Moxie said:
Leta Armstrong: Captain of the 2020 Olympic Pantless Equestrian Team.
26. Lindsey said:
Awwe, They Grow Up So Fast! *Sniff Sniff*
27. Stephanie said:
Very cute pic. Love the floor also!
28. Wendy said:
Leta Armstrong, now with less pants!
Chuck looks like he's noticed the mailman or a squirrel, or perhaps an errant piece of cheeto fluff.
BTW, I don't know if you refinished the floors yourselves, but they look gorgeous!
29. honestyrain said:
i'm not sure what's cuter...the kid or those floors. dang. now my shitass hardwood that's been in this house since 1945 looks all the suckier. stop being better than me with your takes good pictures camera and shiny new floors. yer makin' me feel bad.
do you dress Leta to match the floors on purpose? i mean, they're nice floors so i could se why you would.
30. Jenny said:
I just want to smother the two of them with kisses!
31. Amanda B. said:
Awwwwww, heck. Come on now Dooce. Southern accents can be quite charming. (ie...Ah quite enjoy mah accent, dahlin)
People do tend to associate a southern accent with hickdom- but oh well. I'll bet your accent is waaan-da-ful.
I love Memphis- I'll bet it was an interesting place to grow up. It's a bit like N.O. w/out the urine- vomit-beer smell.
Hope you guys had a wonderful holiday. Smooch the kids for my husbando and I!
32. Biggest Apple said:
Looks like Leta has just spoken her first word - "Bum".
Maybe I've just been living in England for too long now.....
33. dooce said:
this photo was taken on Thanksgiving day at my mother's house, so those floors are only two years old. and my mother is INSANE when it comes to cleanliness. thus, all my issues and consequent years of therapy.
34. Katie said:
Look ma - no teeth!
35. the niffer said:
Dooce: Ok, that makes more sense. I didn't think you'd have a star-spangled mat in your house. Not that there's anything wrong with that...
36. Poppy said:
Must know where you found the horse shirt! My 9-month-old daughter is already crazy about horses and we need that shirt!
37. Bruce said:
i hate whe people come to visit & they bring their dog - how annoying - leave the dog home fer christ's sake!
38. dooce said:
niffer: THERE IS EVERYTHING WRONG with that star-spangled mat. wait until you see the pictures i took of the scary ceramaic pigs she has EVERYWHERE in her kitchen.
Bruce: my mother tells us that she doesn't want us to visit her UNLESS we bring the dog. chuck is her grand-dog. they have a special relationship.
39. kim said:
am i the only one who thinks it's an unbelieveably kitschy and ugly shirt (sorry) and that there's a slight chance leta might hate you for putting it on her AND taking a picture of her wearing it in a couple of years AND putting it online? but i love the floors ;o) and i hope you had a great thanksgiving.
40. Joan said:
Hey Bruce, you think taking a big dog with you visiting is annoying? I went to my friend's house on Thanksgiving with a 10 week old puppy! Now there's something to test friendship with.
41. christilee said:
My mom treated us kids and dogs like that. until I was about five I thought my sister was a black lab named Tara. That did not sound right...Anyway I was no too upset when I figured it out.
42. christilee said:
Looks like Chuck is guarding her with his life...Either that or he spotted someone in the kitchen with left over turkey pizza. Both senerios and Children are super cute. Also, Kim the shirt is not ugly, it's kinda retro 50's cowgirl.
43. wixlet said:
i'm with debbie--more chubbly baby legs! our son's most ticklish spot is right at that chubby leg fold.
44. kp said:
Awe!
Bruce: I bet you get a lot of visitors, too, what with your warm and kind demeanor, sensitivity to other's lifestyles, and your pleasant way of speaking your mind.
45. curiouskiwi aka Brenda said:
I think my 18-month old might have a crush on Leta. This morning when I was looking at your daily pic, he pointed at me and said "Dooce, dooce, dooce!" Then again, he was waving his cup, so maybe he just wanted some OJ.
46. steph said:
That one day you were gone was an eternity. I pined for you dooce, I really did.
The kid is adorable as always, Chuck looks like he's been on constant alert to the smell of Turkey. mmmm.... turkey.....
47. koof said:
yay i am not the only who who went..uh star spangled mat is SO not what i expected dooce to have in her house, but WHEW it's not yours.
but anyway, hope it was a good thanksgiving!
48. Monica said:
I just want to cut off her cheeks and deep-fry them in cinnamon.
Too cute!
49. kp said:
hey! someone else is using my name! crap! need a new one!
this will NOT do.
50. jelene said:
Leta and Chuck have no idea how many thousands of online fans they have.
"The official Leta and Chuck fanclub"
51. Ali said:
I love how the dog always looks as though there is most definitely something more interesting going on to the left or right of the field of vision of the photo. Hilarious. You are so lucky to be blessed with such a beautiful daughter. Actually, now that I think about it, all the dooce readers are blessed. If Leta was an ugly baby and you showered us with pictures, it'd be a totally different story. I once saw this baby that looked like a monkey. No joke. She even had the small round ears. Then her mother says, "isn't she adorable?" and what am I supposed to say? "no, she's the most hideous baby ever. she looks like the spawn of a monkey crossed with your husband, who is also not an attractive man"
So in short, thanks to you and your family for being so damn aesthetically appealing. Leta is by far the cutest baby I've ever seen.
52. The Mighty Jimbo said:
with that shirt am i the only one thinking howdy doody time?
53. Alli said:
My mother has not only a Star Spangled rug in her kitchen but a Star Spangled Nauvoo rug in her kitchen. There's a lovely shadow of the Nauvoo temple over the backdrop of a flag. Isnt that fucking sweet. I always tell her "isn't it awesome that the government was behind the temple burning? Lets celebrate that by stepping on the flag/temple while we wash the funeral potatoes off of your finest china, mother." I think her silence means that she can't think of anything else to add to that comment since I'm right. Either that or she is trying not to cuss me out. No bishop's wife would cuss somebody out on THANKSGIVING FOR HEAVENS SAKE!
Btw, Leta = adorable. I want to chew her cheeks up...but not in a scary way, thats just what I do to my kids and to cute babies.
the end
54. jm said:
Leta: "ROAR! I am THE LETA!!! You WILL obey me! ROAR!" (She's so cute when she is waving her arms and trying to be scary. It doesn't work. Such cuteness makes it hard to see "scary.")
Chuck: "What is that? Can I have that?"
55. luke winter said:
Bloody hell you get a fair few comments don't you? This is a bit of a pointless one as that is pretty much all I'm saying presently. I could comment on your gorgous (i never could spell that word) site design as well but I think I'll save that for another day.
56. Martha said:
Man, I love your dog. he always looks so chill. Like, if he could talk, he'd be the coolest guy ever.
Leta's cute, but you already know that.
57. Kahli said:
She is very, very cute. THat shirt is fabulous!
What was the Thanksgiving picture?
58. christilee said:
Kahli , I am also wondering what the Thanksgiving photo was...Looks like it could be one of those 60's paperweights made of resin and filled whith wheat. What was it Dooce?
59. dooce said:
i will never tell!
60. Amanda B. said:
That shirt is awesome. Much better than a scratchy, froofroo, baby-torture, pink, frilly dress get-up. I have baby pics of myself trying to claw my way out of monstrosities like that. Thus *my* years of thearapy...
61. Helloid said:
Hooray! I'm first to comment.
62. Kahli said:
Oh no! Seriously, we looked at it like, 10 times both days. We can't figure it out...
Is Chuck in it?
You ALWAYS tell!!!
Is it from rate my poo dot com? Siiiick!
It is beautiful, it looks like (here I go) Chuck and leaves and warm and sunrise-y... something to give thanks for anyway, unless it IS from rate my poo... nasty.
63. the niffer said:
Dooce: you're so right. Star-spangled mats = very wrong. I didn't want to offend my American friends.
Forgot to mention earlier - Dooce made it to the business section of our local paper, but they fucked up the address:
http://www.canoe.ca/NewsStand/LondonFreePress/Business/2004/11/27/736128...
64. alli said:
Was it a grapevine pumpkin with light behind/in it?
65. BB said:
How cool do you feel to have created a brand-name of sorts -- like Kleenex, Xerox, or Scotch tape, which people use to indicate any and all such items, even if of another brand. If you're keeping a scrapbook of articles in which you're mentioned, it will be a fascinating bit of family history for Leta and any siblings-to-follow. Next step: Monopoly(R) - Dooce Version. ;)
66. Heatheranne said:
Is she taking flight again?
67. shelagh said:
I too love your floors! Beautiful! And cute kids, too ;)
68. BB said:
BTW - The little piece shaped like Chuck would be way more popular than the scotty dog, and somehow you simply MUST make the little shoe match those cute red shoes you sported in the photo of your neighbor-defying dance. Yes, I think I'm onto something here! If it's not already in the works, feel free to run with the idea -- I think you'd make lots of readers happy.
Happy Holidays to your sweet family!
69. me said:
so here i am, a week without _any_ net access, and mf gf is waiting foe me to log on and read hardware/games news. but no, the first thing i read is dooce.
again.
yippe hooray
70. Meg said:
admiring your flooring...
71. Angie M said:
I love Leta's top! That material is fabulous - why I can't I find grown-up clothes that cool?
72. poppy said:
What is Leta WEARING???
73. poppy said:
OMG is that fashionable in UTAH?
74. Amanda B. said:
Gee whiz. The Thanksgiving picture sure is pretty. All I eeeever wanted is just know what it is a picture of. I'm just a poor, sad, wittle person...sittin here, thinkin how happy I'd be if I only knew what it was. Sigh. Sniff.
P.S. Heather Armstrong is pretty, and sweet, and smart, and funny, and smells like a flower. *blink blink*
75. dooce said:
i'll still never tell! but, just for you, Amanda B., i'll let you know that it was taken outside.
76. Kahli said:
If someone guesses, will you tell?
YOu see, I have 9 chapters about a small village in Greece to read by Tuesday, and really.. I would rather check the comments on dooce.com every 3o minutes (we got a cuckoo clock forour wedding so Iam always on schedule with the obesessing!)Will youtellthen?
77. Shelly Rae said:
Love the shirt! I once had cowboy flannel sheets in a similar style. Then I put holes in them wearing cowboy boots to bed.
I think the Thanksgiving photo was a stained glass window taken from outside at night. That warm glow is the light from inside, rather than the other way around. I've photographed a lot of stained glass though--perhaps I'm fixated...
Anon.
78. Amanda B. said:
Well, i think it's a close up of the -illuminated by a flashlight heiney of a space-monkey, directly after having been discoverd in the bushes.
Run Mr. Space monkey- Run!
79. Amanda B. said:
Note to self: Do not mix nightly crack-rock with Tryptophan.
80. ChickenFlicken said:
I find that if I mix nightly crack-rock with tryptophan, I get a good bit of sleep between episodes of picking my burnt lips and stealing money from my husband's wallet.
81. Shiz said:
Leta's first internet diaper shot!
82. Sheryl said:
Hey u'all - Hey Amanda B. How was graciasgiving? Or is it mercisgiving?
I still think the Thxgiving pic was a composite of images, all light behind branches (silhouettes)... But maybe I have just had to much chronic.
83. Kahli said:
aarrggh.
I am two Bailey's too far to continue my perusing of the lives of Spartokholiots...
Heather, I think you are the best writer on the planet, you were up for the Booker Prize and the Pulitzer this year, blog category? Also, don't you have Oscar inthe wings for Best Screenplay? For your recognizable from afar contribution to "My Life: Punk Rock"?
Oh, and the PHOTOS and my GOD YOUR contributions to all things FASHION FORWARD and schlick!
Any more hints? Har.
HAve a wonderful weekend and beautiful night, everybody.
Cuckoo.
Cheersxo
84. Amanda B. said:
ChickenFlicken- You love Jeff Buckley AND Emmy Lou?? You are the crack-rock MASTAH!!!
Howdy Sheryl! Holidays were wonderful- ate too much, slept just the right amount, put up our tree. How were yours?
85. Sheryl said:
Heylo Amanda B,
It was warm and peaceful, didn't eat too much, but I did sleep. We had my nieces over last night and I didn't do my usual (get up at 11 pm and stay up a few hours writing). I stayed in bed and actually went to sleep - it had to be the Leftovers Tryptophan.
Tonight I tried out my super old Epilady, but after 3 shots of tequila I still couldn't take the pain. I could only do one leg. Throb.
I musta had ballso'steel when I was younger and could use this thing. Tried the cheap way tonight and I do prefer the wax I guess. Less prolonged. Doesn't require falling into a semi-conscious semi-hallucinatory stupor. I am thankful for the wax, and for the Brazilian lady who does it so well.
AmandaB are you southern belle?
86. Kath said:
Look...it's 'Chuck & Cheeks'.
Heather/Dooce - so thankful you share your life with us everyday. Your blog is definitely a ray of sunshine :-)
87. Sheryl said:
Goodnight, comment wit you soon.
Must go now.
BF Man is watching It's a Wonderful Life and made up a rap during the commercial to get me to cuddle with him.
Can't ... resist ... his ... rhyme ... and his brown eyes.
'Night.
88. coskel said:
Has anyone seen the portal site that lists dooce.com as "a modern-day Erma Bombeck"?
Erma Bombeck was never as astute as Madam Dooce. Southern accent and all. ;)
89. Michelle said:
YUM! What a gorgeous baby. All the photos together with all your stories ALMOST makes me want one of my own...almost. I will stick with my own iteration of Chuck for now. I think Chuck heard a squirrel in Massachusetts and is intently waiting for it to get closer. LOVE CHUCK!
P.S. I painted one room in my house today ONE ROOM and am sick of being handy around the house - all that work Jon did ... makes him a saint.
90. Paula said:
Leta is so adorable, I could gobble up her cheeks.
As for Chuck, what a handsome dog!
91. DurhamNative said:
Ok, Heather, this may be a bad thing to tell you, but while at Linens & Things I found something you might need to have. It's made by Rival and it is some kind of crockpot type device that makes, you guessed it, Buffalo Wings!!! Imagine an appliance dedicated to the glory that is the Buffalo Wing. Just thought you'd want to know.
92. Karen Rani said:
"THE NIFFER" - I'm in London ON too! Leave it to the crapbag Free Press to mess up Heather's URL. Geez....
Amanda B - you and your crack make me laugh...wait a minute...that didn't sound good.
Where is Fish?
TTYL - I'm off to join Flylady.net and become wife of the year....riiiight...
93. Ima Postin said:
I thought everyone might get a kick out of this blog entry. Jon is listed as a DILF aka Dad I'd Like to Fuck. :) http://66.235.180.57/~bletchl/archives/000210.html
94. Maria said:
Oh My God!! My husband does the same thing...the baby comb to 'fluff' his beard!
95. Amanda B. said:
Karen Rani- no offense taken. My crack is pretty damn funny. :)
96. Sue From Ohio said:
I think the Thanksgiving photo was of a stained glass window...
That would be a cool game for the 'Daily Photo'!!guess what it is....win a subscription to Dooce for a whole year, er, uh, or something like that. Autographed picture of Chuck, perhaps?!?!!
97. bb said:
dooce, can you please please please please post a little clip of you saying something? I cannot imagine that you have a southern accent, especially since I feel like I know you so well through your expressive and ever so eloquent writing!
Please?
98. Mo said:
On Thanksgiving day, i was carrying my baby nephew around, when all of the sudden my sister comes up to me and says, "oh, crap. his socks are gone."
Overwhelmed with guilt, I thrust the child into her arms, apologised for ruining her marriage before it even began, and ran away. You were in my thoughts on thanksgiving, Dooce.
...and yeah, where IS Fish?
99. sidekick mommy said:
cute shirt, we have the jammies and stocking cap to match
100. Amanda B. said:
Yes. And while you're at it, can you send me a lock of your hair? I've been doing a lot of reading, and I'm pretty sure I can clone you.
*call the police*
101. the niffer said:
I love that the comments always seem to come around to boxes and cracks and nads. Fun stuff.
Karen, that is so freaky that you live in London! I think we need to let Mr. Canton know that he fucked up the address. I didn't try dooced.com - I wonder where that takes you.
102. Kahli said:
We just watched The Simpsons and Krusty runs for Congress (Republican) and his opposing candidate is Jo(H?)n Armstrong and Kent Brockman says "How can I prove we're live? PENIS!"
Had to come and share.
How did everyone's night end up?
I saw a junkie face off with la policia in front of the dollar theatre while we waited for sushi...
Beats the hell out of studying!
103. Karen Rani said:
Okay Niffer - you inspired me to start my own blog and I've been at it all evening, with the exception of breastfeeding my 4.5 month old...thanks! We will have to give the Free Press a kick in the a$$ for Heather!
AmandaB - okay, I LOVE your crack! ROFL!
Man it is getting late here....
104. different kim said:
i think the thanksgiving photo was a photoshopped pic of the trees from the "reconvening" trip to the mountains.
105. Super Turtle Girl said:
Leta! You are such a lucky baby to have CHUCK as a bro AND such cool wood floors...I'm all alone and have only mediocre wood floors at home...I know, I know...they can be a bit hard...didja hit your head on them yet?
106. christilee said:
TELL US!!!!!!
PLEEEEEAAAASSSSSEEEE...
107. Lushlife said:
Not hard to work out what you would have been thankful for on Thanksgiving Day.
108. bluecheese said:
:) Lets looks like you've just licked your hand to smooth her hair down. :)
109. bluecheese said:
:) Leta looks like you've just licked your hand to smooth her hair down. :)
110. bluecheese said:
sorry, Lets = Leta up there.
111. bluecheese said:
um...
112. Robin said:
Patrick (18 months) says, "Babe!" Don't tell Jon; I don't think he's ready to think about Leta dating...
113. Heathertoo said:
Does Leta ever wear a dress? I understand the no frills attitude w/her, but only a t-shirt and diaper to dinner at the Avon Ladys? You want to drive your poor mother crazy dont you?
114. honestyrain said:
ok, i feel better re the floors not being yours. maybe i don't suck that bad after all. maybe. oh god, please don't let me suck when comparing myself to this internet woman and her floors. please. i am begging. please.
please.
115. honestyrain said:
also, i am so relieved that is not your mat. i didn't want to say anything previously but i did feel redeemed by not having such a silliness in my home. especially given that i am canadian.
i always think it's so odd when canadians have american flag stuff in their homes or on their bodies. people here (very few but still) will wear jackets that say USA and are all red white and blue. nothing against such a jacket but...um...YOU'RE CANADIAN FOOL.
the concept eludes my comprehension.
plus such a jacket is just ugly no matter where you live. so tacky.
116. JoJo said:
Unless you're on an
olympic team, honestyrain.