Raising an addict
Monday afternoon after spending several hours with Jon's family we drove 45-minutes to my father's house. During the entire trip Leta whined that she wanted to watch Elmo. "Do you see a television anywhere in this car?" I asked, and she would wait a few seconds and whine again as if to say, "I don't see how that is relevant to this conversation."
By the time we had spent a few hours with my father, Leta had been without television for over nine hours and she couldn't wait to go home to her shows. As we gathered our things she grabbed my hand and sang, "Go home and watch Sesame Street! Orrrrrrrrrrr Teletubbies! Orrrrrrrrrrr Boobah! Orrrrrrrrrrr News!" Each "or" was stretched like a rubber band to emphasize THE POSSIBILITIES, MY GOD.
Jon and I shook our heads at both the tone of her excitement -- the options were blowing her mind -- and the fact that she was so happy to be headed back to the television that it didn't matter what she watched, she'd even settle for a little news. How desperate does a kid have to be that she'd forego Elmo for Brian Williams just so that she can warm herself by the light of a cathode ray? All her veins have collapsed, but she needs the drugs bad enough that she's willing to inject the needle under the nail of her big toe.
As I strapped her into her seat she was still listing off shows when she looked over and saw the bag of emergency goodies we had packed for the day away from home. When she spotted a bag of M&M's her focus shifted instantly, and she shouted, "I eat M&M's! Orrrrrrrrrrr gummy bears! Orrrrrrrrrrr cookies!" Her brain could barely wrap itself around the opportunities.
I climbed into the seat in front of her, craned my head around the neck rest and said with a shrug, "How about nope! Orrrrrrrrrrr nuh-uh! Orrrrrrrrrrr not a chance!"
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FM Living
tarable said:
Thank you for making my day. I thought we were the only ones raising an addict.
05.31.06 - 08:22 AM / 1SueFromOhio said:
You should probably avoid advertising her addiction to the boob tube since all the crazies are going to flog you for allowing it...HAHAHAA And 'they' say Crack is bad for you ;)
05.31.06 - 08:22 AM / 2HDC said:
Brain Williams eh?
My two month old is already on the addict path. How elseam I supposed to get his laundry done?
05.31.06 - 08:25 AM / 3Allbeehive said:
This makes me want to go home, eat a snickers, or popcorn, or an energy bar and rewatch the season finale of whatever I have on Tivo. Oh wait, I'm an adult.
05.31.06 - 08:28 AM / 4Urs said:
brian williams? dear god, if she has to watch the news at least giver her anderson cooper!
05.31.06 - 08:28 AM / 5jacks said:
After reading this post, I think I'm an addict, too.
05.31.06 - 08:29 AM / 6lmmom said:
When my oldest was very young, we were able to keep him from junk food up until about 18 months. We went to a family party and although he had never seen one in his life, he dove headlong into a bowl of Cheetos. Up he comes with a big grin, covered in Cheetle up to the elbows. So much for 'if he doesn't know it, he won't want it'.
The TV had been part of his life from day one. We're all addicts - am I not reading and typing this?????
05.31.06 - 08:29 AM / 7leahpeah said:
make her hold out for the crack and make her say it nicely.
05.31.06 - 08:29 AM / 8Meepers said:
As someone who did not have TV in the house till age three or four - let me tell you - age doesn't matter in the TV addiction or not. In the last six years (since I've been married/had cable) I've made up for lost time. Someday Leta and I can be in TV-Anonymous together maybe, no? Orrrrrrrrr not.
05.31.06 - 08:30 AM / 9SydneyDawn said:
HAHAHA. That last line sounds like something that would come out of my mouth.
Leta's a doll.
05.31.06 - 08:31 AM / 10jolie said:
and yet... she didn't request the dog whisperer. strange.
05.31.06 - 08:32 AM / 11Dr. To You said:
Leta is as bad as my kid. As soon as he gets into the car, he yells for the DVD player to come down.
I'm a David Gregory fan myself. Something about a 6'4" man dancing to Hilary Duff....
05.31.06 - 08:35 AM / 12BabyKEsq said:
I had a run in with a similarly minded two year old on Monday. Her and her parents had been in the mountains without TV for the whole weekend and when I saw her on her way home she was struggling to get out of her car seat desperately chanting, "Dora. Ayuda. Ayuda. Dora! Dora! Ayuda! Doooorraaaaaa!"
05.31.06 - 08:37 AM / 13Heather said:
My kids think that as soon as we enter a store they must have food in their mouths. I have to warn them before we leave that I'm not bringing anything or I risk dealing with a meltdown. And my girls ask me to take a shower in the morning, so they can watch their shows.
05.31.06 - 08:37 AM / 14sweetney said:
TV good. also see my comment here: http://blogher.org/node/5903
your post is timely, woman!
05.31.06 - 08:38 AM / 15mamaphunk said:
Lady. Seriously.
You've gotta stop posting adorable stuff like this.
I'm engaged, my Mother said she won't pay for the wedding if I'm with child and you posting crap like this makes me really weigh the decision.
05.31.06 - 08:39 AM / 16Tiggerlane said:
Do I sense the Armstrongs shopping soon for an in-car DVD?
For those of us who have now become addicted to Leta videos, you know we're going to expect some audio/visual documentation of the stretched "or" beast.
Orrrrrrrrrr Chuck.
05.31.06 - 08:39 AM / 17Mindola said:
Leta and my husband obviously have some things in common.......
He sounds just like this when I let him off his leash in Home Depot.
05.31.06 - 08:48 AM / 18Faith said:
Dude...I love my addiction to television. Love it, love it, love it. I've been fostering it for a lo-hoooong time now, and am proud to say that no other addictions have been able to conquer my resolve the way t.v. has.
Just a warning, I'm a fat 32-year-old. Not sure if that has anything to do with my love for t.v., but it's a fact. (I watch t.v. while I walk on my treadmill 4 times a week...and in fact I walk more in the evenings now so I can have "better t.v. to watch" while I do it. Yeah, I don't have a problem...)
But I am an otherwise healthy, well-balanced, and well-informed girl, and would encourage any parent to allow their child to watch as much t.v. as possible growing up. How else will they know when things like Brangelina's baby being born occurs?
05.31.06 - 08:54 AM / 19wordnerd said:
it's pretty wild that at her tender age that she'd grasp the concept of choice to this extent. amazing.
05.31.06 - 08:55 AM / 20Thérèse said:
Hee.
Ohhh, you know she's gonna be one of those people who bounces around in her chair when she's excited about anything and everything. Even when she's 25. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
05.31.06 - 08:57 AM / 21wenhaver said:
My kid is an addict too. He goes nuts whenever he hears the Law & Order theme song. I get him to go to bed by saying "you want to watch a movie?". He's 20 months old.
There's a Simpsons quote that goes something like "I watched a lot of TV growing up and I grew up TV". Our son is growing up TV alright...
05.31.06 - 08:59 AM / 22Kristine said:
Xanax orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Excedrin PM orrrrrrrrrrrrr a glass of wine orrrrrrrrrr .... yeah, sounds like my night time routine.
I went to church camp and after a week my mother said, "You know...I think Eddie Murphy's RAW came out last week...wanna go to the video store?"
05.31.06 - 09:00 AM / 23ktjane said:
ahhahaha! you are the coolest mom! leta will appreciate your sense of humor someday. probably not until after the teen years when you'll be so not funny, but like when she is 27.
05.31.06 - 09:02 AM / 24jes said:
I imagine that when you responded to her, she cocked her head to the side and gave you a blank stare.
05.31.06 - 09:07 AM / 25Shooters Station said:
And her response... yes! ooooorrrrrrrrr absolutely! ooooorrrr sure! orrrrrrrrrrrr now!
05.31.06 - 09:08 AM / 26Kristen in Colorado said:
You know, Teletubbies is a pretty bizarre show, but it doesn't even hold a candle to Boobah in the creepy department. I just don't get the appeal. Some night when I'm having trouble sleeping, as if trapped in the Twilight Zone, I hear the warbly, spooky, sing-song, "Booooo - Bahhhhhhhh-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ahh"
05.31.06 - 09:09 AM / 27Maniacal said:
My daughter is 8 months old and she already like TV. Especially Boobah, orrrrrrrrr Big Big World orrrrrrrr Dragon Tales!
Should we NOT let them watch? They are educational...hey you said it yourself, Leta learned her letters, right?
05.31.06 - 09:12 AM / 28Rbelle said:
I just posted a question to my mom readers about kids and television... my son is also an addict, unfortunately to the Wiggles. I am so happy when he asks to watch "Thomas" (the train) or "SCOOBY DOO!" because it is one more step away from the Wiggles.
05.31.06 - 09:15 AM / 29Meg said:
Oh lord. You sound exactly like my mom. And that's awesome.
05.31.06 - 09:17 AM / 30