Zombie College

While rummaging through our storage unit last night looking for some paperwork, I stumbled across this gem sitting in a box of files: The photo was taken the first day I was on BYU campus, late August 1993. I’d always hated having my picture taken, but that day I had on my special grumpies for [...]

Lesson

Sometimes I drive aggressively. Most of the time, in fact. Like this morning on the way to work, you could say that I drove aggressively, perhaps even dangerously. But I would never put anyone in any real danger, no. I may harbor an abiding hate for pedestrians and drivers who hug their steering wheels, but [...]

Evolution of the Mormon Cusser

When I was eight years old and lanky with huge square teeth I used to spend hours at a neighbor’s house indulging in every contraband known to a child reared in a Mormon household: MTV, Nintendo, re-runs of “Three’s Company,” and endless experiments with flammable bodily excretions, to name just a few. The first time [...]

Memoirs of a Recovering Mormon

I have wasted the last several hours of my life reading my journals from my freshman and sophomore years at BYU. I don’t think any other activity could be quite as depressing, except perhaps actually attending BYU. The following are selected excerpts from the sophomore year journal. Accounts of my freshman year are just too [...]