On the occasion of her eleventh birthday.
Milli Vanilli had it all wrong. Blame it on Mercury.
Seriously, what were filmmakers in the Eighties thinking when producing puberty education videos?
On behalf of all her classmates who probably whittled down seven pencils each trying to figure out that math problem.
When I get called into the principal’s office for this I will become yet another cautionary tale.
There may be more Play-Doh paraphernalia under the tree tonight along with a giant bag of coal and a scrolling list of chores.
Before you judge me, remember that the other one I raised was deconstructing Shakespeare at her age and negotiating peace treaties between warring nations.
“Last night I sat there struggling with the duty I have to destroy that innocent notion of hers, a notion born of my ignorance and my privilege, the privilege shared by so many other well-intentioned but naive white parents.”
I’m sure that there are at least fifty posts on my site with that title, but this one… this one really deserves it.
“I knew I couldn’t call the police because that would frighten him even more, and so the quickest and best solution for everyone involved was to get him inside his house.”