From Hamilton to Hamilton to Armstrong

Where all those capital letters come from.

Bless this food that it might not trigger heart disease

How to cook: use one hand to call for takeout, the other to scratch your butt.

Grumpy baking happy fun times

Because wrestling a pig in a puddle of mud does not sound like fun to me.

Preparation (H)eather

I am the parental equivalent of the black jelly bean.