The circus of life

Any and all stereotypes contained herein are in no way the opinion of my employer.

The past that is our ongoing present

The only thing that is going to top this for her upcoming birthday is a real live puppy, and wow is she going to be devastated with a gift card to a hardware store.

Your basic chicken salad

The delicious staple of my diet that does not ever get boring or lose its ability to fill me up.

To teach and preach

If you haven’t locked your front door now might be a really good time to do so.

Well dressed men

Chief Operating Tyrant and official person to go to when floundering with your wardrobe.

Belated

I’m going to say nice things about this man despite all the pranks and stunts he’s pulled over the years.

An early Halloween

Yet another prank with lasting repercussions, thankfully not digestive in nature.

Dusting off my Southern hospitality

By the end of the night everyone was speaking with a drawl and swapping stories about the mud flaps on their pickup trucks.

I rented a zoo

If you’re missing a bear I know where it’s spending its nights.

Up in the SLC

You down with SLC, YEAH YOU KNOW ME.