An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Beautiful Blonde Outlet

  • DoulaBrooke

    Sheryl- I have a picture of that Bunghole liquor store in MA from 8 years ago while driving through town….I couldn’t believe my eyes so I HAD to take a photo! How funny!

  • Whoa. Racy.

    When you said she was dressed as an outlet I first thought you were cruelly ridiculing a victim of Mall American.

  • Hey! That’s me! I was a…um….socket? for Halloween!

  • Sue From Ohio

    The Pixies *ROCK* I am soooo jealous…

    Does Dooce Do the Pixies?

    You people are just just the punniest damn people I’ve ever ‘met’…um, read…uh, whatever…

  • Sue from Ohio

    Nice ‘Greatest American Hero’ theme song there…what are you a Christopher Cross fan, too?!?!?! Such an eclecic choice of music man…you’re cool! hehe

  • As an aside – because there seem to be a lot of those on this here comments page – does anyone else read Dooce’s comment page for its entertainment factor? Or am I alone here? I get all kinds of things from reading the comments – everything from getting to read other interesting and well-written blogs to gagging over sycophantery (is that a word?) to agreeing with my fellow commenters. It’s an exercise in online people-watching.


  • Danika

    I too read the comments for the same reason Anne.

  • Katy

    Im not the only one with “Fish Fever!”

  • Erin

    I’m with you Anne.
    If you want to be an online voyeur check this guy out – I love this site!

  • Amanda B.

    Congrats on the wee one, Fish and Fish’s baby momma!

    Everyone feel free to engage in free-form fertility dance for the Brumfields.

  • If you don’t know who that woman is, then how do you know that’s her husband?

  • Melanie S

    To the smarty that was making fun of me for posting that I was posting first….

    When your day starts off like this:

    you can get excited about whatever you want! : P back at you!

    Anne, I read all of the comments and have found new blogs, great deals and learned a lot too. I wish all blogs were this great.

  • Fellow Ohioan Sue: Did you check The Pixies out when they played here? I caught them at the Columbus show.

  • wix

    that is a nice smile. you know, i’m seeing a pattern of nice-looking people in salt lake city. maybe it’s just y’all’s friends or their friends, or the people you choose to photograph, but they all look friendly and pleasant. did you know that utah has the highest rate of volunteerism in the country?

  • shy


    o man, “black-speak”?!

    1)Not all black people speak that way (see Eminem and Micheal Rappaport) and 2) Ebonics is not what was referenced above – Ebonics is a mutation of West and Niger-Congo African Language Systems, not necessarily what you referred to as “black speak” or “urban slang”.

    Not attacking just educating.
    Keepin’ it real, fo shizzle.

  • Sue from Ohio: no. We Wisconsinites are much more into the House of Pain’s “Jump Around” than we are into Kriss Kross’s “Jump.”

    I was always having accidents from wearing my snowsuit backwards, anyway.

  • I thought it was “sha-zizzle.”

  • shy

    fo shizzle fish-izzle!
    and I’m out dis beeyotch.


  • I have no idea how the term “baby daddy” got into this comment thread, but I do want to make a public service announcement on behalf of my friend Stef, who is a lawyer:


    Apparently, when some women fill out forms at their intake sessions, they list their relationship to the other party as “baby daddy.”

    I can’t decide if “baby daddy” is becoming more acceptable and the legal system should embrace it, or if it’s just klassy with a capital K. 🙂

  • come on

    christy – maybe naomi watts crossed with elizabeth hurley?

  • Sheryl

    I am very confused about why anyone would take the “baby daddy” comments so seriously??

    Do you honestly feel those comments were intended to be “legally binding” or that they would “validate” some reader’s suspicion that “baby daddy” is a legal relationship?

    Or am I just missing something here?

    Are we going to also offer disclaimers that people can’t *really* be electrical sockets, too?

  • Amanda B.

    That would be my fault. Annnnd baby daddy can be legal if said baby daddy is married to the baby in question’s mamma.

    The most wonderful thing happened to my husband and I the other night.

    These kids had a blowout in front of our house, and asked to use our phone to call for help.

    Kid: “Yo, can I use yo phone I done wrecked my ker.”

    Me: “Sure, no problem”

    Kid: “Tankyou”

    Me: “Do you need a jack?”

    Kid: “Naw man, I ain’t got no tire you know.”

    Me: “Oh, ok.”

    Kid on phone now: “Hello Mommy. Can you come pick me up please, I had a blow out. Ok thankyou.”

    Me: “Did you get a ride then?”

    Kid: “Yeah, you know. Thanks and shit.” scratches crotch.

    I love that damn kid.

  • buckmulligan

    Wix: Utah was settled by Northern European immigrants (who were Mormon converts). And there has historically been very little immigration of people with Italian or African or Eastern-European heritage, as there has been in more urban settings. So you get blond hair, blue eyes, fair skin, and the milk-fed body tone. Everything our culture has dictated to be beautiful. (I prefer a little color in life myself.)

  • buckmulligan

    Oh, and the few non-blonde women there feel they have to compete with the many real ones, exacerbating the problem.

  • Four Non-Blondes. Now THAT was a great band.

  • Tracy

    Fish – and here I thought you must live in SoCal, because there’s a gas station/deli in Del Mar called Pump and Munch too… Maybe there’s a chain of them? Hard to imagine. Also amusing is the liquor store in La Jolla called Liquor Box.

    Amanda B – You (U?) crack my shit up. Keep it real, sista!

  • she has a caroline rhea-esque smile. at least from the looks of the photo.

  • Jess

    TOH gossip for you: I heard that Tom Silva is a total diva. (Say it isn’t so!)

    I love when all the TOH dorks stand around the table and try to guess what the weird gadget is that they’ve found.

  • Carol

    In Beaver Creek, CO there’s
    “Beaver Liquors”


    I LOVE IT!


    In Oakland, CA there was a store called “Linolium Dicks” and a another all time favorite “Superior Erections”!

  • shelli
  • the niffer

    I, too, get most of my day’s entertainment by reading the comments; I think Fish is the funniest dude on this site, third only to Dooce and Chuckles (oh, if he could speak); and I had not heard the phrase baby daddy until today. Maybe it hasn’t made it to Canada yet?

    By the way, thank you for putting baby daddy in context – I just didn’t get it.

  • Woo

    For those who didn’t see it posted last night –

    Losing your job over something you wrote online. Named after, a blog run by Web developer Heather Armstrong. Armstrong got canned after anonymous critiques of her coworkers were linked to her.

  • Doo-zooceizzle

  • Sorry for my last comment. That horse is now officially dead, too.

  • this is the best comment thread EVER.

  • Sheryl

    Fish, Horse-shizzle! Shizzle is king on For a shitload of puns, have you seen the PoopReport –

  • Kelly

    Are you all stoned, or what? Hilarious.

  • Dooce – I think you just need to set up a message board..

    Nice picture..

  • Have y’all seen this? Someone compared the IQs of states who voted for Bush and those that voted for Kerry.

  • Tapeworm

    OMG – Check out

    But don’t eat the fruitcake or the tapeworm first – it’s frustrating if you haven’t hit the “jackpot” yet!

    Dooce, when you can’t shizzle, maybe you could go to this site and get some pseudo-satisfaction!

    Hey wait, is that the problem? Did you eat cement and water at one time?

  • angela


    I’m the first post!!
    I just knew it would be me one of these days – I’m sooo happy.

  • Amy

    DoulaBrooke and Sheryl:

    No shit! I have a picture I took of Bunghole Liquors, too! My husband and I nearly peed ourselves when we saw it.

  • I am thinking I would like to be a one-gallon Ziploc storage bag right now…

  • Danika

    Too freakin funny! I just spend about 20 minutes on that site tapeworm. Thanks for the laugh!

  • Gia on Guam

    another heather: I totally agree she has the Caroline Rhea look.

    As much as I’d like to give Butthead the credit, Bunghole is an actual word that has something to do with liquor

    bung·hole n.
    1.The hole in a cask, keg, or barrel through which liquid is poured in or drained out.

    and before anyone else adds to:

    2.Vulgar Slang. The anus

    I too read all the comments…and come back several times a day to be sure I hadn’t missed any. Thanks to timezones, most of y’all are asleep and thru posting by the time my day is done.

  • Maybe it’s just me, but that girl looks totally Mormon. I think it’s the blonde hair and the giant, wide-eyed smile.

  • Sue From Ohio

    *Chris From Ohio*…no (as she weeps uncontrollably), I am a mom of 3 kids who has no life outside of college reminiscing and Dooce, of course…

    *Fish*..I’m assuming you don’t know who Christopher Cross is, which is good..

  • I think it’s fair to say, MamaDooce, that Leta’s head will only continue it’s current growth rate being that she has two Scottish parents. (i think)

    I two am the spawn of Scots and my head is freakish. I am terrified at the thought of giving birth to a child with this DNA.

    P.S. Hey! Back off the South. Not all of us are idiots. Some of us smell purty, talk good, and almost ALL of us are strong swimmers.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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