An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Patatomic and Rebecca

  • i suppose you could do an entire “rip the children’s book” series…

    cat in the hat: terrible influence
    where the wild things are: don’t even get me started
    mrs. piggle wiggle: what type of potion-wielding witch was that woman?
    amelia bedelia: total idoit
    berenstein bears: can’t do anything right
    all of disney: ok, yes, let’s teach our girls that they are nothing until a prince kisses them and gives them life
    brother’s grimm: can we say scary???

    anyone else?

  • not that I’m representitive of all of Seattle…I just live near by. (suburban haus frau with slippers on)

  • hey all…Seattle is waking up now. Just poured my first cup of coffee, checking to see if you all are behaving today. 😉

  • T.S. Eliot I think I love you.

  • Coskel: I saved your site, so when the time comes we can talk rates. Have a wonderful Saturday everyone…I am off to do homework.

  • TexaRican

    Morning all, it’s be-yootiful here in Houston today!

    Henryk, Ginger, Yamila: Thanks for the cool early morning Welsh/Oz talk. “…and is pronounced Jones” made me snarf my java!

  • Yay Detroit!! Coskel, my husband is from down river. I checked out your site, and may give you a call when we need to get his CD reproduced.
    As for the Detroit Trivia…bring it on!

  • That is a very nice and fuzzy pic. Don’t ya just want to hug them both and sway back and forth.

  • Kendra: that and the fact that it only takes 2 minutes to get through downtown.

    Global: what is mammaramma? what genre music?

    Kassi: very cool, please do – I grew up here and then did the Chicago thing for years and now I’m back…

    as for Chicago trivia: only out-of-towners call it Chi-town.
    And if you’re ever in Cincinnati, OH: its known as “Cinti” (I lived there too for a while)
    OK, can ANYONE tell i am MASSIVELY BORED with the CD-ROM programming I am QA-ing today? I never comment this much.

  • Mammaramma- Regina Spektor is the singer’s name.

    Man. I love Lionel Ritchie.
    “Now that I got me some Seagram’s gin, everybody got dey cups but dey ain’t chipped in…”

    He’s a crooner I tell you.

  • TS Eliot

    Bright lit

    She’s a doll
    he rolls a bugger ball

  • Hey, coskel. I’m in Royal Oak. You can bring the Detroit trivia any day!

  • Kendra at the Lakehead


    I must say, when I’m in Windsor I get totally turned around. It messes with my head.

  • oh, and just cream for those of you keeping score.

  • Kendra at the Lakehead

    You know what I love about Dooce? That there are indepth and not so indepth conversations going on between people from all over the world. Isn’t that amazing?

    I love it.

    Happy Saturday morning all!

  • yes, but the ones in Michigan don’t have dutchies, which are my FAVE, so every once in a while I have to go to Windsor to get them.

    Trivia for the AM:
    Detroit, Mi is the only place in the world where you have to go SOUTH to get to Canada. 🙂

  • super aardvark

    Mamaramma: Regina Spektor

  • Good morning. For the record, I love Good Dog Carl, and am lookig into his babysitting services. Question for all: Did anyone see Conan O’Brien Thursday night? What was the name of the singer that night? My husband’s trying to find her album, but can’t remember her name; he thinks her last name was Specter.. Does anyone know?

  • Is he wearing a denim jacket over a denim shirt?!

    What bravado… and mystery!

  • A while ago I discovered “Good Dog Carl” in the bookstore and I immediately wanted to destroy every copy they had. The illustrations are totally creepy too–long-legged ugly baby! And that baby’s mom…what a cum-soaked barn slut.

  • *dang cold brings in a brick of butter for coskel*

    There ya go. Want some coffee? Double double? Do you guys have Tim Hortons in Michigan?

  • Don’t bogart that

    Very cute – Penny lovers, I presume…Dooce – I have concluded it is the daily photos that have me hooked….I’ve tried to stop, but it’s my daily dopamine fix. Thanks.

  • my muffin needs butter

  • The last line of the not for kids one is really funny.

    I almost wish my mother wasn’t comfortable talking pervish to me. And mom, seriously if your reading this, I don’t want you to ever ask me again if I *KNOW WHAT A BONG IS*.Duh

  • Heh. Blushing. No, the electric mixer came in handy, though. Speaking of such, my ingredients are ready, so I’m outta here. Have a good one:)

  • Easy like Saturday mornin’.

  • Jaysus … she’s a saint. How many years was this for you?

  • 22!!!! We were married as toddlers.

  • Hmmph. Newlyweds. Well, Happy Anniversary, darlin’ … I trust you didn’t need no rolling pin …

  • OK, that one made me giggle out loud. And kinda made me tingle, too. What kinda cookies, though …?

  • They are chocolate chip, for a neighbor who has 5 kids, and is moving next week, house full of boxes, and STILL volunteered to take my kid overnight last night so we could celebrate our anniversary. The lady gets COOKIES for that, she’s a gem!

  • Oh, my. I coulda gone my whole life without that image. I am holding one stick of butter in each hand, squeezing them, to soften them, so that I’ll have “butter, softened, not melted” for the cookies I need to bake this morning. Guess how I’m typing!!! Feel free to incorporate my butter into your, um, scenario there

  • Marie

    According to Parent’s Magazine “Good Carl is the babysitter every family needs.”
    Um, WTF???
    Your story was hilarious!
    And I guess I won’t be getting my mother-of-the-year award because I have never even heard of said “Good Carl” books.

  • Hehehe Susie … I am practiced at one-handed typing. You should see how I do Ctrl-Alt-Del …

  • Heh Susie … couldn’t slip that past ya …

  • No, that was one of my favorites…and since you’re already up multitasking and all, I suspected something like that was involved

  • I’ll take a cue from you folks. I’m a-goin back to bed.

    ::humming to myself – Come join out partaaay seeeee how it’s made!::

  • Nilbo, do I detect a Seinfeld reference?

  • Night, Henryk …

    And Plummie, I am the master of multi-tasking … if not neccessarily my domain …

  • Henryk_

    just joshin. Night all. going this time!!!!!

  • Henryk_

    and the same to potty mouth s_plum

  • Henryk- Potty mouth? What? Where? Was I bad? Cause I aim to be.

  • Wait, Nilbo aren’t you supposed to be doing something to Bucky with a rolling pin? You mean to say you can chair dance AND operate a rolling pin?

    Wow. You can multitask.

  • Dooce-Been reading your blog for a while now and I love it. You are truly dazzling! Just wanted to say thanks for the great words.

  • nightie, night, Henry

  • Nilbo – Ah chair dancing… My favorite sport. I love when the trumpets go toot-toot-toot-toot-toot-toot-toot, ba-baw-ba-ba-ba WEEE-ba, ba-baw-ba-ba-ba WEEE-ba at the end of All Night Long. Yes. That’s what trumpet sounds look like when they’re typed.

  • Henryk_

    ok Nibs, go go about your daily chores….I am going to bed! Good Night all to all youse doocers!

  • It’s 7 a.m. here in Arkansas. On weekdays I can barely make it out of bed by 7:15, but on SATURDAY, the day I can sleep late, I jump up wide awake at 6:30. Go figure.

  • Henryk_

    and the same to you, Vanessa!

  • I love Lionel Richie.

    Everyone you meet,
    They’re jamming in the street,
    All night looooong


Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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