Playful, elegant, and not above the judicious use of the word “shit."

Revelations

Last Thursday was day four of my cleanse, and at about 3:00 PM that afternoon my caffeine-withdrawal headache subsided for a few hours and I got a rush of energy that I had hoped would be an indicator of things to come. But that night I did not sleep a wink, and I felt like puking all day Friday. Saturday morning I woke up with a sinus infection to end all sinus infections that I tried to ignore, but by that afternoon I was lying prostrate in bed moaning in pain. By Sunday the entire right side of my face was paralyzed, and I could only chew food with the teeth at the back of the left side of my mouth. Which basically narrowed down my food choices to whatever would fit through a straw. My dead grandmother was allowed to eat more than I was.

Monday morning Jon said that if I didn’t call the doctor to get some antibiotics he was going to call up there himself, except he wouldn’t say it was because his wife had a sinus infection, he’d say it was because his wife needed a lobotomy. Did they have any spare q-tips? How about some cotton balls? Could he borrow a pair of dull-edged scissors? So I made an appointment for that afternoon, hauled my miserable body up to the clinic and told my story to the doctor. He nodded, said, yep, sounds like another sinus infection, and as he picked up his pen to start writing me a prescription I casually mentioned that I had started a diet cleanse a week earlier. Not a crazy one, no. It’s not one of those cleanses that requires you to shove a garden hose up your colon, so you can stop worrying that I am going to poop right here on the table in your examination room.

He stopped himself immediately, set down his pen and was all, you’re doing what? So I repeated myself and listed off all the things that I had not eaten in almost eight days. He shook his head silently, leaned over so that his elbows were resting on his knees and said, “Do you want to know my medical opinion about that?”

“That depends,” I said, not sure yet if I wanted him to agree or disagree with me. Here I had gone almost eight days on this cleanse without slipping up once, and if he was going to tell me that he thought I was crazy then I might just have to poop on his examination table. Because DO YOU KNOW WHAT I HAVEN’T EATEN IN ALMOST EIGHT DAYS? I COULD GIVE YOU A LIST BUT YOU’D GET BORED AFTER PAGE 200. But if he thought that what I was doing was fine, then oh my god, I’d have to go how many more days without sugar? Thirteen? I can’t even count that high.

He continued to shake his head. “I am absolutely certain,” he continued, “that the reason you have this sinus infection is because you’re doing this cleanse. And my opinion is that you should stop.”

I almost kissed that man on the lips.

I hadn’t gone into that room looking for a reason to stop the cleanse, but when those words came out of his mouth I realized just how miserable I had been all week. And because my emotions were so out of whack it felt like he had told me that from now on when I peed, one hundred dollar bills would fall out of my vagina and into the toilet.

So I got in my car, drove to the grocery store, dropped off my prescription at the pharmacy and then walked over to the British foods section, picked up a package of Hobnobs, and ate one right there in the aisle BEFORE I EVEN PAID FOR IT. I had to grab hold of the shelves to balance myself because I experienced a full-body orgasm.

And then Mama had a glass of wine with dinner.

But the interesting thing has been that I haven’t gone off the cleanse all that much. In fact, I tried having a cup of coffee yesterday morning, but it tasted rancid. And all day today my meals have been meals I would have eaten on the cleanse. So I think that what I experienced and learned in those eight days has made a huge difference in my attitude and awareness of food. I’ve already made the decision to give up artificial sweeteners and to cut back dramatically on milk, cheese, and bread. I’m also excited to eat more of the foods that I found that have no added sugars (pasta sauces in particular, and I’m loving pasta made with brown rice), and am ready to cut back on all meat that hasn’t been raised ethically (yes, I know, many of you will have so much to say about this in the comments, I can see the adjectives now). This means I will most likely go without meat for long periods of time which doesn’t seem like such a big deal to me now that I’ve found The Sweet Potato. Also, I don’t see myself ever being a regular coffee drinker again. That’s a huge change in just eight days.

The biggest difference I noticed and continue to notice is how much better I am at handling my anxiety, it’s almost like night and day. I’m knee-deep in the middle of making revisions to the manuscript of my second book that comes out next year, and because I’m looking squarely between the eyes of a deadline I’d normally wake up feeling like I’d just swallowed a box of razors. And I haven’t felt that in over ten days. It’s been a refreshing break from the dizzying nausea that usually greets me in the morning.

My friend Carol had been doing the cleanse with me, and she got just as sick if not sicker than I got, so when I was driving from the doctor’s office to the grocery store I called her from my cell phone, something I don’t normally do because if it were legal I’d carry around a gun and shoot people who drive and talk on their cell phones at the same time, but this was important, I was about to change someone’s life. When she answered her phone she sounded like she was on the verge of dying, so I told her what my doctor had told me, and I thought I heard the faint whisper of a tear roll down her cheek. “Thank God!” she said. “Thank God you got sick and went to the doctor!”

And then we agreed that we should both send him flowers.

  • Smurf (all the way from Scotland!)

    Good on you for trying something new, for trying to make a difference to the way you feel.

    But you just have to do what feels right for YOU (in body and in mind) and not what suits other people.

    I’m vegetarian, still eat a few bits of dairy produce, but no meat or fish, or other animal products. I have a latte or cappucino in the morning, and that’s it on the whole. But I don’t limit myself if I feel like having more. I just try to do what feels the best for ME.

    So, no comments from me on whether you’re doing wrong or right! Well… maybe just one… 😉 The only thing is… you said somewhere else in your blog that you drank lots of coffee and diet coke every day… You put TONS of caffeine in your body (a stimulant), now you’ve cut it out and you wonder why you don’t feel anxious any more? There’s your answer… 😉

  • Oh Hobnobs. What I wouldn’t do for one of those right now. . . .

  • The Omnivore’s Dilemma. Read it. The information is so good and feels sort of like a cleanse (without, you know, the pain) because I look at food in a completely different way. I’ve always been very aware but this breaks down what’s going on with organics and what we really need to nourish us.

  • Glad to hear that you are listening to your body. Drastic change (like this cleanse) aren’t always the best ways to go about making healthy choices.

    As far as what you noticed about the cleanse and the changes in your anxiety levels – I totally hear ya! I have been diagnosed with depression and insulin resistance. I know that when I keep on track with healthy eating (meaning cutting out the refined sugary junk), my mood is much more level throughout the day. It’s amazing what even the slightest shift in blood sugar chemistry can do to your mood and attitude.

    Keep up the honesty – it’s what keeps me coming back.

  • Amy

    Re. Comment #97 and the recommendation that you take grapefruit seed extract for increased energy and reduced stress:

    Grapefruit can inhibit the enzymes that help the body to process some medications, including some anti-depressants. (In particular, Zoloft is mentioned again and again in the literature, as are, interestingly, Methadone and Viagra.) There is an increased risk for side effects. You’d probably want to check with your doctor before you consider taking this, (or any), supplement.

    Here’s some basic info from the reliable Mayo Clinic:
    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/food-and-nutrition/AN00413

  • Since you mentioned pasta sauce, the best pasta sauce EVER is Rao’s marinara sauce (pardon the hyperbole but this stuff is really incredible). Since you visited NY recently you’ll feel like you’re right back there again. Rao’s Restaurant in Harlem only has 8 tables and is always booked by those with… well, CONNECTIONS – but you can buy their sauce in your local supermarket or even online! The ingredients are tomatoes, garlic, olive oil, fresh basil, and maybe salt and pepper. It’s the only jarred sauce I’ll ever eat… makes me feel like home, minus the smell of bus exhaust and hot garbage in July.

    Congratulations on making it through your cleanse thus far, and those of us in the high fructose corn syrup club welcome you back with open arms.

  • Jill

    Eight days of a cleanse sounds a pretty good start to me – all that food looked lovely.

    What interests me is that you and hubbie suffer from so many sinus infections. If one of you is feeling down, bang, you seem to get a sinus infection. I found an alternative remedy which worked great and means that any infections I get are short-lived and require no drugs.

    Basically you spray pepper up your nose. It hurts like buggery (an English expression not to be taken literally) but works a treat. Capsaicin spray from a compounding chemist.

    And as my Grandmother always said, a little of what you fancy does you good. And that goes for HobNobs too.

  • liz

    i’m totally impressed that you made it eight days — i fizzled out on day one, because i’m an utter coffee addict. however, i still think it’s weird that your doctor was like “oh my god! stop that cleanse right now!” it’s not like some weird fast or raw diet or even a macrobiotic diet or something. i really don’t get it.

  • I was doing a detox (of my own making – not from a book) during the same time that you were doing yours. I had a similar experience where the first few days were hard (headaches and such) but I still felt better in my body and felt good about what I was doing. Then after a few days, not so much. Although I’d heard about detox symptoms, I wasn’t willing to go through it while I had three kids 3 and under to take care of. I kind of ended up doing what you’re doing – still keeping mostly to the detox diet, but adding in some of of the “forbidden” items as well. It really helped.

    I’ve been thinking about food and researching the ethical implications for about a year now. Once you know the costs of our food – not just animal lives but the impact on our planet – it’s really hard to look at food the same way. I feel like I’m on a path to veganism, getting closer all the time.

    Good luck with your journey. I hope you will write about it from time to time as your thoughts and your relationship to food continues to evolve.

  • lori

    Hey, it was worth a try right? And you learned stuff, so aside from the deathly sickness, it wasn’t a bad deal. I probably could give up meat fairly easily, but I’m afraid I wouldn’t be conscious or committed enough to make sure I got the protein and etc from elsewhere. Just be careful, we love you. :O)

  • I love you the most bc you know and love hobnobs-
    they are the devil of all cookies…Once in England I ate a whole tube-fer reeeel! Glad yr listening to the doc!

  • I feel like I ought to type this with very small letters….

    I do think the sinus infection came from the cleanse. And I would argue that your body was trying to get rid of all the phlegm (i.e., irritation of the linings of your body) from milk, dairy, meat, etc. (Coming from someone who thinks Cheese is a basic food group)

    From your experience, I’m definitely going to be using my neti pot during my cleanse.

    I hope you feel better soon.

    And I think 8 days is great. Isn’t it supposed to be one day at a time? And if you want you can do another 8 days in 6 months, 9 months, a year, two years from now.

  • It sounds like a good choice to end the cleanse early and you took some good lessons away from it. I think I’m too scattered to ever do a restricting diet and would likely end up eating a Twinkie and then being all Whoops! But good for you and thanks for being honest about your experiences.

    By the way, I listened to your interview on the radio and quite enjoyed it! Being that I was at work, I had to try not to snort a few times. Thanks for sharing it with us non-Utahans!

  • Is it wrong that I was also relieved when the doctor told you to go off the cleanse? Because I was worried that if you said the cleanse was the absolute best, most orgasmic experience, second only to tap-dancing with Jesus in a bowl of chocolate ice cream, I would feel compelled to try it…and I really didn’t want the knowledge that giving up wine and pasta would make me feel that fantastic.

    BUT: I’m glad that you were able to take some good things from the cleanse experience – especially the lessened anxiety. Kudos to you for having the balls to commit to it full-out.

  • VinnyGirl

    See, I told you Oprah doesn’t know everything! Good for you for trying the cleanse, but I am with you on THANK GOD IT’S OVER.

  • Even though it didn’t go as you thought it would, I appreciate you being honest about the progress. I am surprised the lack of certain foods is why you got so sick. The whole process is so interesting to read. Thanks for sharing!!

  • I’m just curious – what about the cleanse made you both sick? Withdrawal type stuff? Was Carol’s sickness sinus related too? Wondering b/c I’ve been thinking about starting. Maybe I’m off the hook? Sorry about all the questions.

  • There is no ethical meat – don’t try to fool your self. It’s fine for you to eat meat, but just admit that it’s cruel to think that you have the right to eat aother living being. I do it. The difference is that I admit what I’m doing it unethical. Anything less and you’re just foolign yourself. I still like you though (most times).

  • You know I did South Beach about 4 years ago and my experience was similar to yours. I didn’t sick, but eliminating things from my diet did give me a new perspective on what I was eating. Long after that diet I still eat a lot better. So some good (and permanent changes) can come from these things.

  • Interesting experiment. Cool ending. 🙂

  • I’ve been reading & enjoying Dooce for a while, but have never commented before … I think it was the mention of Hobnobs that brought me out from under my rock.

    Sending the doctor flowers would be nice, but I bet he’d prefer some Hobnobs.

    Glad to hear that you’re beginning to feel better.

  • Amy

    This just proves my theory that skinny vapid Oprah is trying to kill us all. I want fat relevant Oprah back.

  • Jen

    My husband suffers from anxiety and was doing a program that suggested cutting out caffeine and reducing the sugar and it is amazing that it does work and does have such an affect on some people. Everything in moderation, eh? I think that’s always the key and a good glass of wine every so often… 😉

  • Terroni

    I started the ethical meat thing a little over a year ago. I’m a poor, poor med student, so I just don’t buy meat now. I can’t really afford the time or money free range requires (time because you actually have to research what ‘free range’ means to the asshole who stuck it on the package).

    I will say, though, I don’t miss it much. When I’m tempted to purchase some, I remember something an old friend told me once, “Once you buy the meat, you become the reason it died.” That friend was a hunter who took his responsibility to make the quick kill very seriously. Unfortunately, if you sent me out to the woods with a bow and arrow, I’d come back without dinner. Or my left foot.

    So, I’m pretty much off meat. I’m still a bitch in almost every other way, though. In fact, sometimes I chuck hunks of broccoli at old ladies and small children, just to spend a little of the karma I earn by not torturing the animals.

  • I’ve done a bunch of cleanses and it is normal to feel like crap. That’s the toxins leaving the system. And better out than in. You get past that hump and you are feeling fantastic. But really it sounds like you moderated, not stopped. So good job, you’ve inspired me to try this one you did. After vacation.

  • I’m also a little puzzled at the doctor. I started the Eat to Live diet a couple years ago for many of the same reasons, told my doctor what I was cutting out and what I was eating and she was thrilled. The diet was very much like the cleanse, all the same things are omitted, and there were food goals that I had to reach (like eating 2 lbs of veggies a day).

    Of course, by that time, I had gotten to a better weight and my cholesterol dropped 30 points, so she saw that it was working for me. There has to be more to the story than the doctor just telling you to eat unhealthy foods.

    It’s interesting what you’ve said about food tasting different. Like I said, I gave up many of the same foods, and my perceptions changed within 6 weeks. I remember eating some veggie lasagna with bread sticks as a “cheat” and it tasted way too sweet! I also used to be the biggest fan of cheese ever, but now I won’t touch the stuff if I can help it.

  • Hey Heather, have your heard or tried reading the book Skinny Bitch? http://www.skinnybitch.net I think you might like it based on the new decisions you’ve made about your diet. I tried it but it’s definitely something I have to gradually ease myself into as opposed to jumping in.

    Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. Lets us know what we might be getting ourselves into, haha.

  • Everything in moderation Heather. I think doing cleanses shock the body, and agree with your doctor that it most likely made you sick. I also like your new attitude towards food – if only everyone thought like you. Get rid of the artificial crap, eat smaller healthy portions and even the bad stuff in moderation. Our bodies were not designed for all the stuff we constantly put in them, but doesn’t mean I’m not going to have a beer or two (ok three.)

    Anyway, thanks as always for sharing – enjoy your ethically treated grilled steak as much as I do.

  • Liz

    I am in my 30’s and I grew up in a large midwestern family. We had a huge garden, cows, pigs, chickens. My mom milked a cow, she canned every vegetable, we butchered the cows, pigs and chickens. My entire childhood – from birth through 18 was spent eating only “free-range”, “organic” food — at the time it was called “being poor”!!!!! 🙂

  • Claire

    Let’s just get this straight. When you go on a cleanse, you feel bad because “toxins are leaving your body” just like when you had blood let in the 1800s you felt better because toxins were leaving your body. In other words, that idea is total BS. If you want to do a cleanse fine, but don’t believe made up stuff. Why can’t people just be sensible and moderate in their habits-eat fruits and vegetables, drink moderately, eat whole grains, eat small portions of meat-instead of going extreme and cutting things out and then thinking “ooh, this is the right thing to do BECAUSE OF THE TOXINS!”

  • Does this magical medicine man make house calls? To NYC? Oh, and I’m no ob/gyn, but I’m pretty sure we don’t pee out of our vaginas. Unless I’ve been doing it wrong all these years.

  • I’m so, so glad you shared this today. I was wondering how you were doing this morning, and I was getting ready to jump into the “cleanse” thing myself. Not so much anymore.

  • Sarah

    Wow, that is amazing isn’t it? Did the doctor have any concrete explanation as to why eating ‘right’ would cause you to get sick?

    How does lack of sugar and caffiene increase nasal congestion?

    I have to wonder which came first .. is it ‘because’ you cleansed you got sick, or is it ‘because’ of the cleanse that your were purging a sick body that we just learn to live with? I gave up coffee for the 9 months I was pregnant, and I found it tasted vile during that time. I cannot imagine a day without coffee though, love love love it!
    I’m glad the cleanse taught you some stuff though, pretty cool and worth it just for that.

  • Candice

    Heather – I am so glad you are stopping the cleanse diet. When I first read that you were trying it, I hoped it wouldn’t last long, but hate to rain on one’s parade. My cousin, who is a Bariatric specialist (M.D. who helps people loose weight in a healthful way) has shared nightmare stories of her patient’s detox diets. Ridding the body of “toxins” is a bunch of B.S. That’s what the liver, kidney’s and digestive tract do within a few hours of consumption!

    EVERYTHING in MODERATION, right? Normal healthy eating always works best. Good luck with cutting out those Diet Cokes and sugar, you will feel so much better. Unfortunately, they have now found great health benefits from coffee drinking. Maybe next year it will be bad for you again?

    Oh, and SHAME ON OPRAH!

    Hope you feel better soon.

  • JennyM

    I really don’t know from cleanses, and there’s something about the fact that you would feel wonky for a few days after making a cold-turkey change like that, but to be so miserably, utterly, uh, miserable and sick — that just seems off. BUT, it greatly impresses me that you are able to be so open about “here’s why I’m doing this” and ALSO “maybe it wasn’t the best idea BUT here’s the good that DID come out of it.” I have a college friend that is constantly going on these completely WACKY “cleanses” — usually because she read about them in People or US Weekly or something — that involve eating nothing but hot sauce and cabbage for three weeks or, I kid you not, eating nothing but salmon for a month. Salmon! For a month! I know what you were doing was more responsible and scientifically/morally grounded than something in a gossip magazine, but having roomed with her for several years and kept up with her since, I feel predisposed to be highly skeptical of anything called a “cleanse”. ANYWAY, good for you, for sticking to it so well and for knowing when to stop and for recognizing the positive you can take from it despite having stopped. You rock.

  • Maru

    Thank god! I’ve been doing the cleanse (I read your “cleanse post” while undergoing the worst hangover of my life, so I figured no time like the present) and have been sick since Sunday. Sinus infection, chest pains, the works. Even scheduled a doctors appointment for tomorrow. Hopefully, she tells me the same thing your doctor told you!

  • julie

    hi, hobnobs are ok…try the lion bars or jammie dogers….hmmmm good for any diet…

  • Rebecca :)

    Heather,

    I have been reading your blog for a while now… I’m addicted, but whatever 🙂

    I used to suffer from crippling anxiety. Some days I was doing good just to leave my house and go to the grocery store. It was that bad!

    In October it will be 2 years since I completely cut caffien, sugar, flour, and wheat from my diet. Since then the anxiety that used to rule my world has all but disapeared. I do still eat meat… (mmmm! dead animals) However, I read every label on every single thing that I buy and I do not put into my mouth any form of sugar including the fake kind…. I do eat fruit and I use real fruit juice to sweeten…. But I found that even a small amount of (gasp!) chocolate and within hours anxiety creeps in. It was a shocking revelation…. because I love chocolate.

    Thats my story… hope some of it will maybe cause a light to shine in what may be darkness….

    Becca

  • I gave up eating anything blue for 24 hours one time. Didn’t work for me either. Viva la Junkfood!

  • Eric

    That guy talking about magic bacteria sounds like he’s on crack. Same with all the “it’s the toxins leaving your body thats making you sick!”. People who do *anything* cold turkey get sick. Period. Caffeine, heroin, that crack they’re smoking, ANYTHING. Much less going cold turkey on 18 things at once.

    Cut out one or two things at a time, ease your way out, and never look back. Moderation is much more important than going cold turkey, and it’s also much easier to keep up with.

    I’m a vegetarian who avoids sugary drinks and overly processed foods. I also avoid dairy because I finally realized it was giving me stomach cramps, explosive farts, and immense quantities of snot, especially hard chunks that I would have to cough up in the morning after it dried out overnight.

    Seriously, dairy is worse than meat. Far worse. Humans simply should not be sucking on cow tits. Ever. Only human tits, and even then, not for milk.

  • I’d be interested to know your doctor’s thinking about why the cleanse is so bad for you. Perhaps giving up so many things at once cold turkey like that is just too extreme for your body to handle? Because certainly all of the things that you gave up are things that it’s healthy not to consume too much of.

    When my partner and I gave up coffee, we chose to do it in the last week of December so as to give us almost two weeks of time in which we didn’t have to see family (having gotten that over with already) or colleagues (he works in a university and I was in school, so we had the first week of January off). We spent two weeks moaning and snarling and fighting over who got to sit on the heating pad and who got to play games on the laptop. It was hell, but after that we did have more energy and felt a lot better. Four years later we do drink coffee again but in much smaller amounts, and I don’t drink it every day.

    You shouldn’t have to take any shite from anybody about what you eat or don’t eat, or which farmers you choose to buy your meat from. That’s a personal choice that’s nobody’s business, and I’ve never really understood why people get so confrontational about the whole thing. But try telling people that you don’t really care for chocolate and watch them freak out.

  • Molly

    If you like The Sweet Potatoes and try The Roasted Carrot (#11), check out Heidi Swanson’s http://101cookbooks.com/ I love love love her book Cook 1.0, and there’s a whole section on oven roasted veggies in there. Yum.

  • There are WAY too many comments to read, though I would love to read them all, so I’m sure someone has already asked this. What I really want to know is what was the doctor’s reasoning behind the cleanse making you sick? I’m not saying it’s not true, I’d just like to know why he thinks that was the case. Interesting.

  • I’ve tried cleanses myself and wound up only with nasty migraines…. totally not worth it.

    Like with everything else in life, moderation is the key.

    Cheers!
    Welcome back to LIFE!

    -HappyWifeHappyLife

  • Bananadoc

    Mmm. Ethical bacon. And hobnobs. I love you, Dooce for your honesty. But not in a stalkery way.

  • Oh, wow! I can’t believe it was that bad. So glad you were able to get in & see him.
    🙂 Becky

  • Glad you’re back among the living. I’m wondering why the cleanse made you sick? Did Dr. Wonderful have any theories (just general curiosity because I never grew out of the ‘why’ stage)?

    I was forced to get off sugar three years ago when I started taking TNF blockers for my RA – the damn meds wouldn’t let me eat anything sweet. And I’ve realized a) how incredibly bad sugar is for you – everytime I have too much (i.e., more than a teeny bit), I feel nauseous, woozy and crappy; and b) how addictive it is. The more sugar you eat, the more you crave. It oughta be a controlled substance. Oh, and c) I also realized how much sugar there is in EVERYTHING. Regular food, things that are supposed to be good for you are chock full of sugar. It’s insane.

  • Lisa

    I heard just yesterday that Oprah had a class of wine to celebrate the end of her cleanse. Moderation….moderation…our bodies aren’t young any more.

    I love the taste of coffee. I drink decaf. I grind my own beans with a touch of cardamon (it’s supposed to take away the toxicity). I steam my milk which makes it easier to digest.

  • I have been watching your detox with interest. I can’t help but wonder what if your sinus infection had nothing to do with your cleanse? A good wholistic doctor I know once said, if a car accident occurs in front of your very nose right after you sneeze – did the sneeze cause the accident? Obviously you’d say the sneeze didn’t cause the accident. Since you have a history of sinus infections perhaps it simply was a seperate incident? The dr was an alternative practitioner, finding a dr that supports what you are up to is another thought. In my 13 years experience most medical practioners simply don’t have the training in this hocus pocus alternative stuff. Detoxing is very ugly business, it parallels cleaning a closet – it gets very chaotic before it finds it’s sense of order. You eliminated alot all at once. Not a bad strategy. Just alot of housekeeping to do! The wisdom of the human body is postively amazing. It can get the job done IF you stick with it. If getting toxins out of your is the goal, does that mean they should all be wrapped up in perfect pkgs with pink bows on them? It’s actually a good thing for you to experience some of their ugly heads! It’s really fantastic news that the quality your putting in is doing some housekeeping with the crap you’ve put in the body. I assist folks just like you who are interested in making changes in their diets. I also educate about which nutrients assist which organ of the body so that a cleanse can be about getting toxins out vs reabsorbing them. Perhaps you were not properly eliminating or getting the toxins out? Be reminded that sugar is an addiction. If you stay off of it for 2 weeks straight you’ve made an important stride, but one granule will put you straight back on the sugar path again. It’s not a temporary thing. The american diet is brutal with regard to it’s hidden sugars. I believe that sugar is evil, and illness producing. It’s very hard to totally eleminate it. Most people can’t. This is how pervasive it is. I truly encourage you to stick to this path you are on. You’re on the right track ! If you were determined to quite smoking, wouldn’t having a cigarette on day 4 be a bad thing? The sugar thing is the same. It won.

  • Kai

    I’ve enjoyed reading about your experience, full-blown cleanse or not. I think that educating yourself and being more conscious/present is the ultimate benefit of these types of changes. We long ago nearly eliminated all processed/preserved foods in our home, but we still have a long way to go. I made a great discovery a few weeks ago — if you Google “Feeding the Whole Family,” Google Reader has almost the entire cookbook available for reading. It’s helped with a lot of our dinner/lunch recipes and gave me some great ideas. They don’t have it at our local library and I’m not sure yet that I want to buy the whole thing, but with its large sections about quinoa and sea vegetables it might give you some more concepts for your food.