An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Her porn star name would be Dirt Digger

I just this second caught Coco on video both crying and digging at the floor because Chuck won’t give up his bone (something I got a still photograph of yesterday), although the digging in the footage I caught is tiny in comparison to what she normally does. Like that one time we let her out to do her business and when we opened the door to let her back in found this:

coco likes to dig, part 1

And this (Note the discarded, dirty paper towel she stole out of the garbage can and took outside with her. It was a treasure!):

coco likes to dig part 2

And this is how far back she threw the soil:

coco likes to dig part 3

It’s like “go use the bathroom” translates from English into CRAZY as “we’ve buried two trunks of bacon next to the tree outside, why don’t you see if you can find them.”

So when Chuck isn’t feeling generous, this is what happens:

And then when he’s feeling sorry for her but not enough that it wouldn’t please him to screw with her, this happens:

We could put a stop to this at any second, but why? It’s like we’re living in the wild African Savannah but without the risk of death by stampede.

  • I have tears in my eyes from laughing. What a great entry! Your website usually makes me laugh and I love reading it. Thanks!!

  • Laura

    I don’t know which was cuter in the 2nd video – Chuck lifting Coco by the bone clenched in her teeth or Heather laughing. 🙂

    More videos please!!!!!

  • These videos are hilarious. I have a mini-aussie and a westie and they go at it like this all the time. Although the terrier’s the worst digger – she’s teaching the herder all about digging up the backyard!

  • Hey, I started laughing at the exact same spot in the second video as you did, Heather! I think that means you’re supposed to leave Jon and bring Leta, Chuck, and Coco to Cincinnati to live with me and my pup Riley.

    Well, okay, Jon can come too.

    And hey, we’re a swing state, your votes could make a big difference! ;D

  • Amy

    Okay, my comments have nothing to do with the above posts, but your comment sections for past posts were closed so I’m here now! At any rate, it makes me sad to think that you were in anyway saddened by your posting of a few days ago regarding the nomination of Pallin. When I read it I can’t tell you how much I related and how relieved I was to know that someone else out there felt the same sense of confusion at how many people seem to be turning their backs on the truth and what is best for our country.

    I’m so tired of that righteous attitude brought on whenever a liberal speaks their mind freely. You were speaking your mind, which last time I checked was still one of our inalienable rights in this country. You are entitled to believe what you want and say what you want. No one should judge you for that or put their own poor hurt feelings on you. I think what bothers me most is that I really don’t believe that their feelings are hurt but rather its a tool of manipulation to get you in line.

    Hang in there. Don’t censor yourself moving forward when discussing your political views because of the reaction you received. You are just as entitled as everyone else and if you want to praise worshiping the devil then by all means let it fly.

    I admire you greatly and read your website religously (until this week when I’m on vacation, hence the late comment) and so much of what you say adds value to my day. Even if its not something i can relate to I still know that I will get a great laugh out of reading your site. Thank you for what you do!

    Amy

  • Love the videos, they made my night. We have a full sized Aussie. Aren’t they just the sassiest, most back talking dogs in the world?

  • That was pretty funny. And Chuck even looks fake in video…almost like he’s an animatronic or something. No idea how you spell that by the way.

  • I have a mad crush on Chuck.

  • Oh, we have a dog who does that. If the other dog has a toy, rather than try to take it, she stretches herself out low to the ground and makes strange, almost human sounds. She’s much bigger and could easily take the toy, but apparently prefers to cajole. Loudly.

  • mrsderusha

    Dude! Chuck’s a Republican! “I will not share with you what is mine!” turns into “Fine, you can play with it…Wait!Give me back my bone, Biatch!”

    Love it! 🙂

  • Heh. We had a cat whose porn star name was Butter Licker.

    Love the videos.

  • your dogs make weird noises, yo.

  • holy shit, i am watching my two lunatics tormenting each other over one bone also! although somehow your two are funnier.

  • workroom

    i could watch that channel all day

    ^__^

  • Tashina

    The look on Chuck’s face in the first video is priceless. He’s all “Can you believe this girl?” and “I know right? Look at her.”

  • sue

    OMG
    can i just say
    i love your carpet squares

  • Emily

    To #16-Meg;

    You remind me of so many parents that always blame the parent if a child is not perfectly behaved and assume that if only the parent were better at discipling their children they could behave like—yours!! Well, many people do all the “right” things and still struggle with challenging children- and dogs!! Step off your pedestal and don’t assume that your way would be better. Coco and Chuck are hilarious and fun with so much personality!

  • Anonymous

    The look on Chuck’s face when she takes his bone is fantastic! Pets are awesome. What would we do with out them?

  • Which one do you think is the dominant one? Does it ever get too aggressive?

  • That dog stole my damn bone! Great reaction!! Man I really love dogs.

  • Ironically, the post number before mine appears to be 69.

    We’d like to get a dog but then I come and read your blog and know that I’m soooo not ready but your posting of the Furminator has done much to convince me that MAYBE ONE DAY we will get a dog. From the SPCA of course.

  • F

    Please please more videos like these! I could watch this for HOURS.

  • leah

    My puppy Zephyr jumped up on my lap when I played this video and he heard the wild Coco and Chuck sounds. He was perfectly quiet, ears perked up, clearly watching the action on the screen. And then he farted.

    Love dogs, love your videos!

  • Darn! ALMOST comment #70. That’s what happens when you’re so freakin’ popular. Go to leave a comment thinking it will be #100 and by the time it’s posted it’s #672. Everyone’s all “She opened up comments! She opened up comments! Must… post… before hyperventilating…! Okay: ‘Heather, you’re like totally the coolest! You’re my best friend! We have sooo much in common! Everything you say is right! Mormons suck! I pump my fist in the air for you because you are a bloggy goddess!'”

    Not that there’s anything wrong with that (except the Mormons part– yay for Mormons– Woot!). I’m just sayin’. ;-P

    xo,

    N.

  • Looks like something my Pomeranian mix would do. You initially get mad for the first few seconds, and when they give you the look of intense guilt, you can’t help but have those thoughts of anger melt away. haha.

  • Too funny. But not funny enough to make me want a dog. I’ll just watch from a distance. 🙂

  • Maria

    Heh, my hubby and I do that over the last Mars Bar.

    The look on Chuck’s face when Coco steals his bone is exactly that of my husband’s when I wrangle the mars bar and he’s left holding the wrapper.

    Love your dogs, and love your comment about the savannah!

    More videos please!

  • Lauren Strange

    My god, that last video was hilarious.
    Especially when they both had ahold of the bone.
    Reminds me of my daughter when she plays with, well, pretty much any other child her age.

  • A.) I wish I knew why I can’t stop laughing at this. Really. I nearly peed.

    B.) Those dogs sound like sheep.

    C.) I will need to click these at least 7 more times.

    Thank you!

  • Does Coco never get her own bone? Why does she always have to beg Chuck for his?

  • You need to breed that crazy bitch.

    I did the exact same thing in my garden just the other day.

    My husband recorded me…

  • janet jackson

    freaky deaky noises, dot com!
    loved the nutso oral tug o’ war…..

  • Dee

    Dogs are all little Demons of Destruction aren’t they? Sorry about your gardening plans. I just can’t get over the color of the dirt there. It’s gray. Wow. I bet your dog wouldn’t touch the red clay we have here in Georgia…

  • Dogs are a wonderful pain in the ass.

  • Anonymous

    hey amy- just FIND it entertaining… ’tis good for you…

  • kelli

    Great videos, i love how Chuck picked Coco up my the bone wedged in her mouth. Fantastic.

    by the way, if you come to the State Fair of Texas this year, those trunks could be filled with Chicken Fried Bacon.

    Here is how they describe it on the website-Thick and peppery bacon is seasoned, double-dipped in a special batter and breading and, then, deep-fried. Served with a creamy side of ranch or honey mustard sauce.

    They always have the strangest fried foods there, they also have fried jelly beans this year.
    Wow i got totally off topic.

  • thleen

    chuck rules!

  • A.) Which one of them is making that crazy ass noise in the 2nd vid? That is both disturbing and hilarious.

    B.) I love it when two fixed dogs looks like they’re in the midst of something naughty. I know Chuck was just trying to get that bone back, but dude. NAUGHTY.

  • The mouth-to-mouth tug of war was brilliant.
    I had a vision of Chuck dragging the bone and Coco with it, all the way down the living room.
    And then if he was a cat, depositing it with a flourish at your feet, as if to say, ‘Look what I found!”

  • Stephanie

    The sounds Coco makes at the beginning sound a LOT like E.T…

  • kc

    OMG! That is too funny. Thanks for posting the wild hyena sounds in the second video.
    This is why I love the internets!

  • Beth

    My dog Zoe loved these- she joined in on the growling 🙂

  • Ew @#16 Meg, how completely condescending!

    But I digress…if I was Coco I would take that growl sooo seriously, I’m sitting here in my chair 1000 miles away thinking “Oh God, just let him have the bone Coco!”. Chuck’s good!

    @#86 Kelli-deep fried peppery bacon?? Holy cow, I’m coming to Texas!

  • Dogs rule! I’m glad to see dogs in multiple dog households play like ours do!

    Our 3 won’t play with or share a rawhide bone like that, don’t even think about it! But they WILL pick up the red rubber Kong bone, wave it in front of another’s face and run. They end up playing 3-way tug. The growling and moaning and carrying on sounds like war, but we know the difference between real war and this play-war. We all have a blast. Takes our minds off real problems for a little while.

  • chrissy

    oh. my. GOD. That noise emanating from Coco was… amazing! My husband just asked me if it was a goat.
    Heh!

  • and this is the exact reason why my boyfriend does not want us to have another dog, dealing with an obsessive rottweiler’s good enough for now. But that is the funniest thing.

  • fuckin crazy dogs…. all they do is deSTROY

  • Talon

    Oh my GAWD she’s a GOAT!!

    *dieslaughing*

  • This is the reason my boyfriend and I got two dogs!
    The entertainment factor 🙂

    My dogs are sisters and they are 18 months old – Lola & Mimi – they are mini-maltese and Mimi is like Coco in the way that she always wants what Lola has. Even if she has her own rawhide bone – Lola’s looks better so she muct have it!
    (Plus having two dogs means we get to watch them play together endlessly. They love each other)

  • Awwww, nothing better than dog carnage. Puppies are from satan. I have a 5 month old Rottie who just ate my dinner off the table, leaving my plate clean, while I was in the bathroom.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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