This here bringer of the pooper to the fun party

Be ye not so stupid

This morning Marlo woke up with a headache, fever, stomachache and a sore throat. I’m sorry, forgive me if I am mistaken, but wasn’t the tonsillectomy was supposed to cure that last symptom—if not cure it then at least make it a less frequent occurrence…

May 22, 2017

Books People Send Me, Installment Two

A couple of days ago I went completely off the rails about the panic attack I had at the world’s biggest Costco— apparently I used all of the f-words left in the world in that post, and this upset certain people who think I need…

May 19, 2017

A Costco-sized tangent that even I didn’t see coming

I’ve mentioned that when we moved we downsized by 75%, and about a month ago while walking through Costco I stopped dead in the paper towel aisle—BY THE WAY, my Costco, the Costco I attend, it is the biggest Costco in the world. Full stop….

May 17, 2017

// Featured Reads

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Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong. When I first wrote a bio for this site I called myself a SAHM—a Stay At Home Mom, or, Shit Ass Ho Motherfucker. More than a decade later I am now what’s referred to as a FTSWM—a Full-Time Single Working Mom, or, Fuck That Shit Where’s Marijuana.

This used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works.

Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride. dooce is back. And she’s talking about herself in the third person, so you know you better have a barf bag at the ready.

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