the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Recent Posts

Sham Francisco

On what turned out to be a record-breaking scorcher in the San Francisco Bay Area, my New Trusty Rommate and I loaded over 4 pages of Ikea catalog shelving solutions into the back of an oversized Ryder truck. Several HATTEN side tables, OPPLI TV units,…

October 1, 2001


Are you going to eat that french fry?


Ryan Adams: Gold


Expo Dry Erase Markers

How to Charm Me

Don’t appear horrified when I proceed to eat twice as much as you do.

How to Annoy Me

Make fun of the way I drool all over my shirt when I sleep in the car.

Sham Francisco

Launch Sham Francisco

September 30, 2001


I find it astounding that my childhood was spent almost entirely in one suburban residence. For over 15 years I called Cedar Oak Cove my home, the local Piggly Wiggly my home away from home. Since the age of 18, however, I’ve had to memorize…

September 28, 2001


Dolly Parton: Little Sparrow


Destroy Rockcity

How to Charm Me

Fold the laundry that I’ve left in the dryer. Neighbors aren’t supposed to be so humane.