This here bringer of the pooper to the fun party

Thinking

Is it really that easy to confuse “Heifer” with “Heather” ?

April 10, 2002

Listening

The New Year: Newness Ends

Reading

Smug: Maxim

Feeling Guilty

For seriously considering naming my children after characters from The Dukes of Hazzard.

How to Charm Me

Forgive me for eating all of the crêpe we were supposed to share. I can be such a bitch.

How to Annoy Me

Put Matthew McConaughey in front of a camera and require him to open his mouth.