Best way to roast the broomstick. Must try. Five Stars.

The view from inside the bubble

Last week I had to drive to Leta’s middle school with physical proof that I had paid all her fees online so that I could pick up her class schedule. This kind of shit annoys me to no end about the idiotic and asinine red…

August 15, 2017

Attention all runners and those who want to be

Hahahaha! Oh man! Remember that one time I ran the NYC Marathon in 2011 and broke every bone in my body, including my ankle at mile 22? I didn’t reveal that in the account that I wrote because I don’t know? It’s a weird thing…

August 10, 2017

The Parisian perspective on everyday life

Within 24 hours of being home from Paris I was dealing with 70 packages of unopened mail, a dog who had rolled in her own feces, and a basement flooding with water from the washing machine. The plumber was in my house until after 1AM…

August 8, 2017

// Featured Reads

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Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong. When I first wrote a bio for this site I called myself a SAHM—a Stay At Home Mom, or, Shit Ass Ho Motherfucker. More than a decade later I am now what’s referred to as a FTSWM—a Full-Time Single Working Mom, or, Fuck That Shit Where’s Marijuana.

This used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works.

Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride. dooce is back. And she’s talking about herself in the third person, so you know you better have a barf bag at the ready.

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Join the Dooce community
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