Heater, Mother of Lance

A post about Paris unlike any I have ever written

Today’s post is brought to you by Tangents Unlimited®, a production of Heather B. Armstrong’s mind that you’re gonna wanna diagnose after reading this manic rambling spiral into HEATHER HAS MANIC DEPRESSIVE DISORDER AND YOU KNOW THIS BECAUSE YOUR AUTHORITY IS THE DIPLOMA YOU POSSESS…

July 16, 2019

Self-care after finding that lost dog scare

I promised you the other dog story that started out as the original story only to end up being a completely different story about That Other Dog who gave us a total scare the day after I published that post. She’s okay now, but her…

June 19, 2019

“Welcome to your life, there’s no turning back”

I need to write this all down, down baby, down by the roller coaster. Sweet, sweet baby, I’ll never let you go! Well, that just happened. Those words shot straight out of my fingers without any consideration on my part. If any of that means…

June 4, 2019

// Featured Reads

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Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong. When I first wrote a bio for this site I called myself a SAHM—a Stay At Home Mom, or, Shit Ass Ho Motherfucker. More than a decade later I am now what’s referred to as a FTSWM—a Full-Time Single Working Mom, or, Fuck That Shit Where’s Marijuana.

This used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works.

Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride. dooce is back. And she’s talking about herself in the third person, so you know you better have a barf bag at the ready.

 

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Join the Dooce community
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