This here bringer of the pooper to the fun party

Reading

All Of Family’s Neuroses Projected Onto Dog

May 6, 2003

How to Annoy Me

Think that you can drive your car around like a total moron because you’ve paid your tithing and nothing bad can happen to you. News flash, buddy: I CAN HAPPEN TO YOU.

How to Charm Me

Comfort me by holding me and whispering gently in my ear, “One box at a time, baby. One box at a time.”

Feeling Guilty

For watching Operation Dumbo Drop instead of painting the back room.

Listening

Blur: Think Tank

Thinking

Don’t mind me and my hormones, we’ll get back to being ONE PEACHY PERSON real soon.

No, Seriously

I’m so not kidding when I say that the boxes in the masthead above are an exact representation of the state of my new home at this moment. I’m also not kidding when I say that my front yard is covered in as many empty…