An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Baby Bear

  • Lauren

    For a second there I thought Jon was wearing a Members Only jacket! Then I realized it’s just a Patagonia…

  • awwwww! What a sweet pic! I think my dog Polly would be really happy if I had one of those carriers & toted her 50# black lab self around. Except she’d want to face me so she could lick, lick, lick. Happy Monday Dooce Family & Dooce Readers!

  • That slit-eyed against-my-will smile is the very same one I give my loved ones when they try to take my picture against my will for us eon the Internet when I am strapped into my Baby Bjorn!

  • Jon and Leta look like they are sharing a private joke. Great pic.

  • I wish they made a Baby Bjorn for grown men. It would be cool to tool around in a little pouch like that.

    (That sounds incredibly weird, doesn’t it?)

  • Adorable pic. I can almost feel the cold air blowing in Leta’s eyes. She is so totally a “free sample” size of Jon!

  • dreamy.

  • What a very sweet picture!

  • Leta will get revenge! That is the look of certain and final revenge.

    Just imagine Dooce and Blurb, when Leta’s 14 or so and has her own digicam and website.

    She’ll be *threatening* to post pics of the two of you mid-procedure, but what she’ll REALLY be snapping are the tickle pics and the moments when you’ve fallen on your 40-something ass in the snow and you’re reaching for a helping hand.

    That’s what I did with my first polaroid camera. The Falling Down Pics.

  • But where is her .50 sniper rifle?

  • I love the picture. You guys make me green with envy!

  • snuggle-rific!

  • SEK


  • How fucking adorable. I am in love.

  • She looks so snuggly and warm! She’ll treasure this picture. 🙂

  • leta looks as though she might be singing, ahem, “pass the dutchie.”

  • why is it that MY husband never carried the kids in the suggli? why that? huh? how comeski? i think i’ll ask him and show him this photo and say SEE real men carry babies!

    lovely pic. they are adorable, the furry one and the little one.

  • Oh! Look at thos etwo would you?! Very effin’ adorable!

  • Jon: with those baby bjorns you’ve got to watch out. When their legs get to a certain age, your little cutie is going to be kicking you in the balls everytime she gets excited. If you want another child, have it now or make her learn to walk in time.

  • Awwwwe, they look so cozy 🙂

  • Damn, that baby is cute!

  • I know that smile, that’s the, “Ahh, this is so warm and cuddly and relaxing, that I’ll be asleep before you get halfway down the block” smile. At least that’s what happened every time I walked with my daughter in her Bjorn.

  • Ms. Belle

    Look at that cutie!!!

  • Actually, I think that smile means “wait until you see what has squished up over the top of my diaper in back because of all the bouncing.”

  • red

    dig jon’s specs. can’t believe frog baby is almost one – my how time flies!

  • the other Paula

    Oh my God, that is the cutest picture ever!!

  • I don’t suppose you’d be available to follow husbando and I around when we have a critter and take pics would you…

  • Michael

    “Duude, I am SO stoned.”

    (tip of the hat to Scottie G, stacy, and sweetney)(what’s with all the [other] stoner referencers having s-names?)

  • I remember that smile to mean:

    “I am now going to throw up a little bit, and you will walk around and not realize I have yak all over the Bjorn.”

    Leta is Mini Me.

  • lol fish, you’re probably right

  • just LOOK at that little grin! she looks like she’s cooking up some way to keep you guys up all night. 😉

  • Awwwww nothing like seeing the Daddy’s girl bonding moments!

  • Well, Leta is learning earlier how to con daddy into whatever she wants. She’s so cute.

  • Fish, it’s clear from your funny “squished” comment that you have a little one. Only people with extensive little one experience know about things like that.

  • Mir

    That’s precious. Tomorrow can we have a pic of her after she’s fallen asleep in the Bjorn? One of those adorable but geez-her-neck-looks-broken kinda shots that will cause cretins to send you mail about your shortcomings as a parent? Please??

  • Dooce,

    Do you really read all this shit? It reminds of when I used to be rockstar and the teenage fans just couldn’t get enough of me.

    Oh yeah. I never was a rockstar. Bummer.

    From now on, it’s your front page only for me. Farewell, fan club.

  • aw! adorable! papa bear and baby bear? lol too cute!

  • Guys guys! Jesus is back!

  • Mike Zeidler

    She kind of looks like a mini-Joel Hodgson from Mst3K. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

  • JESUS! Dude, I’ve been looking all over for you, you missed some craaaaaazy shit this weekend. Plus, I need to borrow 20 bucks.

  • KimberlyF

    What a beautiful baby and father!

  • I love it when Jesus gets his smite on.

  • Where is Jesus? I can’t see him!!

    I can’t remember what to do to make him appear!
    * “there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home…”
    * Put my lips together and blow


  • I think that he’s excluded you from the kingdom of badass motherfuckin saints because of your cock flavoured potty mouth.

  • Marla

    That could be the cutest face she’s made in all the pictures you’ve posted. I mean…she’s always adorable. But there’s just something about THAT face..mmmm.

  • Girl A.- i think it’s worshiping false Dooce idols that gets his goat. He don’t play that shit.

  • Not to mention your filty language.

  • the niffer

    Amanda B.! Don’t tease. I’m so not ready for Jesus yet. I look like shit today.

    Is he only appearing in Utah?

    Great pic. I totally agree Leta looks as stoned as her mother and aunt did the other day.

  • *filthy language.

  • the niffer

    cock-flavoured potty mouth.

    I haven’t laughed that hard since “shampoo my crotch”. I just love the lingo I pick up here. Like Sesame Street for adults.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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