My eyebrow waxer’s salon is right next door to Kohl’s, and having never stepped inside a Kohl’s I didn’t know what to expect when I went in this morning to see if I could find some new shoes for my upcoming trips. HOLY HIGH HEELS. The Simply Vera Wang collection is unreal, and these platform booties, now on sale for almost half off (EXCLAMATION POINT), are just one of a couple I justified. Okay, one of more than a couple. A few. A sampling.

Tyrant is right this instant submitting my name to the hoarding shows.