ornament

When my family showed up to help me with the holiday decorations, my mother pulled out two giant disco ball ornaments from a bag and yelled, “Surprise!” to the girls. I’m sorry, but what sort of holiday theme is she going for? John Travolta white bell bottom pelvic thrust? Neon bracelets all-night rave in the desert? Tacky?

Marlo asked to sleep with “The Ball” last night. I drew a line and told her no, it’s staying on a branch at the back of the tree where no one can see it.

I love you, Mom. Even though you’re weird.