Dooce Needs a Dog
When I was seven years old I asked my father for a Saint Bernard not knowing that “because they don’t poop little poop” would become the answer to every request I made for at least eleven more years. I couldn’t stay out past midnight because my boyfriend didn’t poop little poop. Couldn’t go to Florida [...]
Listening
Swell: Everybody Wants to Know
Enjoying
Simon Ladefoged
How to Charm Me
You’re four years old and you describe the taste of Diet Coke as “potent”.
How to Annoy Me
Prepare a meal that sends me to sleep with 14,000 calories in my belly.


