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Launch Mammoth

Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche

I have to admit, I never thought I would get married. Wait, that’s not entirely true. When I was a sophomore in high school I remember thinking that in the year 2000 I would be 25 and married because all Mormons are married by they time they turn 25. That’s just what Mormons do; they [...]


My maternal instinct has suddenly and violently turned into maternal psychosis.


Cornelius: Point


Noam Chomsky on the Drug-Terror Link


Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue 2002

Feeling Guilty

For thinking that his baby is just uglier than sin.

How to Charm Me

Admit that you can’t help but love “The Real World.” Welcome to the Dark Side.

How to Annoy Me

Take away my tequila.

A Few Ways You Might Not Want to Spend a Holiday Weekend

Carry out a successful hit and run: Back your friend’s Ford Explorer into a Jeep Wrangler that belongs to a large angry woman. She will jump out of the driver’s seat and threaten to kick your � hmm, let’s see, how would she put it � “skinny white ass.” Refuse to get out of the [...]