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Confessions of a Hot Sleeper

It’s not something I’m terribly proud of, the hot sleeping thing. I mean, I don’t just sleep warmly, or even heatedly. When I sleep I emit measurable amounts of toxic radiation, veritable fucking oodles of hot, hot hotness. I’ve been a hot sleeper since childhood, and so I’ve never known how to sleep differently. How [...]

March 26, 2002

Faces

Launch Faces

Reasons Why This Past Week Might Just Have Sucked

1. I ate all the Cookie Crisp by 10am Sunday morning. That’s five whole days without Cookie Crisp. One, two, three, four, FIVE. 2. I woke up Monday morning with three pubescent pimples on my face: one on my right cheek, two on my left cheek. It wouldn’t have been so bad had my lover [...]

Thinking

I am going to marry the coolest man on earth with the best smelling neck on earth.

Feeling Guilty

For leaning out my window and telling that cat to shut up already.

How to Charm Me

Love me even though I’ve cleaned everything twice with an anality that would drive most mortals away screaming.

Thinking

I promise never to eat the big piece of chicken.

The Great Poop Debate

Having recently endured several weeks of bowel disorientation wherein everything just, well, stopped, I’ve become acutely aware that men and women practice wildly opposing bathroom rituals. I guess I should say more acutely aware, because I’ve always been aware. I’ve just never been so positively sure that the woman’s ritual is the better ritual, and [...]

Listening

DJ Cam: Loa Project