Duchess Cymbalta, before your execution, you will join me at a ceremony that will make this battle station operational
Last week I was talking to a friend about what a nightmare it is to try and find the right depression medication. He suffers from the disease as well and has seen his fair share of pharmaceuticals whose names sound like characters in online role-playing games involving civilizations on other planets. “Captain Klonopin requires your [...]
On Saturday morning I noticed Chuck dragging his butt along the concrete on the sidewalk. This means he needs to have his anal glands squeezed again, by someone other than me or anyone related to me, so that he doesn’t accidentally burn a hole in the couch or God forbid my leg. Jon doesn’t even [...]
Taken with our old Nikon Coolpix 990 which feels like a disposable camera after using the D70 for over a year.
I just got this email from my cousin, GEORGE!: “You realize that you are the number 11, and I am the number 13 on the list of sites that come up when people search for ‘sex kitchen girl’ on Yahoo. Your mother would be PROUD.” My first reaction is: 11? WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? [...]
For the past several days I have been a virtual prisoner in my own home at the hands of alien spores that have rooted themselves inside my daughter’s nasal passageways. I can’t even use the bathroom without having her sit on my lap because otherwise the aliens emit such discordant heartache that the pee is [...]
These were all of my sixth grade projects from just the first semester of the school year: leaf collection, functioning windmill, volcano, miniature replica of the Parthenon, and a pyramid. Do you remember that part in A Clockwork Orange when the doctor comes up to Alex after they’ve deprogrammed him and he shows him a [...]
I just re-read the post I wrote last night before going to bed and all I have to say about it is HUSBANDS SHOULD NOT LET THEIR WIVES BLOG DRUNK.