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My favorite excuse for occasionally being a very lazy parent is, “Oh well, it’s good for her immune system.” As in, even though I just dropped this somewhat damp cracker on the floor and it is now covered in dog hair, I will go ahead and give it to my kid without trying very hard [...]

Peter The Walking Ottoman Johnson

This kid is going to kill it at frat parties

Early last evening I returned from doing some freelance work only to find that the babysitter had just given Leta a sippy cup full of orange juice. I had never seen my kid devour something so viciously, not even the chocolate chip Teddy Grahams Jon fed her for breakfast one morning last week, and those [...]

I am human and I need to be loved

I have a family here on Earth, they are so good to me

High on the list of things that would have prevented us from taking a trip to a cabin for three days with 35 members of Jon’s family was not being able to take the dog with us. Chuck’s attendance was just as important as having a dry, quiet place for the baby to sleep as [...]

Sunrise over Bear Lake

How to Charm Me

Crawl all over the living room like a raccoon foraging through trash, and when the dog gets in your way just reach up, poke him in the butthole, and exclaim, “Wowee!”

Email: I salute you, Texas

Dear Heather, I just returned from the Austin Convention Center after working all day with Katrina Evacuees. Austin is hosting 5,000 people and all I can say is that after seeing what 5,000 clean and safe evacuees look like, I can’t even begin to imagine what the Superdome or even the initial arrival at the [...]

Charlie Full of Slobber

The baby, she likes barbecue

And so does Chuck whom you can see begging in the background.