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Since she first did a back-hand-spring into my heart | dooce® dooce® » I'm Heather B. Armstrong. This is my website. » Since she first did a back-hand-spring into my heart

Since she first did a back-hand-spring into my heart

My next piece about Britney Spears is up at Alpha Mom:

“It was once Britney got pregnant, though, that I really had a hard time believing what I was seeing: the many, many times she was photographed barefoot in public or looking like she hadn’t showered since last century. Why would someone as rich as she is, with as much fame and attention, walk out of the house looking like that when she knows a picture of her bra-less nipples are going to show up the next week in magazines across the country? It was less a disapproving reaction than a confused one, and I was fascinated with the anthropological implications of this superstar showing up in photographs screaming: PLEASE JUDGE ME HARSHLY.”

I’m going to open up comments here because I think there could be an interesting discussion about this. And also because I’m crazy.

  • Jenners

    A month after I had my son in 1991(it was a horrible non-textbook c-section)I was holding him at a store when a friend walked up to me, patted my stomach and asked when I was due with my “next child.” I was mortified. Did she NOT SEE THE BABY IN MY ARMS? If some paparazzi took pictures of me like that and circled my stomach and said something along the lines of “Pregnancy Bump Alert” I would have become postal. I wore those ugly stetch pants–you know the kind that hooked under the heel–and I felt ugly. I was exhausted from my toenails up.

    I also remember the time I changed my son lightning-quick in the booth of a restaurant. Granted I laid him down on the seat and I used the wet wipes I always carried to clean the seat and my hands, but the point is I DID IT. Hi, my name is Jenny and I am a public diaper changer.

    I watched both Britney Spears and Christina Aquilera go from pop princesses to grown women trying to find their niche and style in life. They have evolved more than once, and they will again. While I am not particularly big fans of either, they have both cranked out some kick ass tunes,and I’d love to have their set of pipes.

    I found your piece about Britney to be wisely written through the eyes of an experienced mom. I watched the video clip of where she stumbled while holding her baby. It was not a near miss. It was a stumble and she didn’t even come close to dropping him, but drama and sensationalism sells while “Oops She Stumbled Again” does not.

    The one aspect of Britney’s life I cannot condone, however, is when she hooked up with a another pregnant woman’s man. He should have been off limits, no if’s, and’s, or butt’s. And as she stated herself ‘she’s not that innocent’ she knew what she was doing. But I shall not be the one to cast the first stone; I am not perfect or innocent either.

    Kudos on your piece. I enjoyed it.

  • http://www.blondemomblog.com Jamie

    I joke about being slightly obsessed with Britney on my blog. But you know what I think many of us overlook? She is 24. She’s about to be a mom to two very young children. She’s had an incredible amount of success and wealth come her way at a very young age. When I was 24 I was single, selfish, going out with girlfriends, and still three years away from marriage. I’m not even sure I was ready to be a mom at 34! In some ways I find it refreshing that she is not uber perfect (think Brangelina) and isn’t afraid to be a quasi-normal young woman from Louisiana who eats Cheetos, smacks gum, and goes barefoot in public restrooms. I can’t imagine having two children at the age of 24. I cut Miss Brit some slack. Let her enjoy being normal for a while. I think she deserves it.

  • http://www.mymixedcompany.com Lynnlaw

    When asked by Matt Lauer about changing her baby on the floor of Victoria’s Secret, driving around with the little tyke on her lap and chewing gum during interviews, I believe she responded:

    “We’re country!”

    Doesn’t that cover it?

  • http://www.godtar.com Charles R. Kaiser
  • motherof2

    Wow, what a response this post got! I tried to read all the comments but ran out of concentration at #57!

    Britney is human, she is a young mum about to have baby number 2 and people expect this to be over? When I had my first, I fell apart appearance-wise for a few months, then pulled myself together. Then I got pregnant with my second (21 months between them both) and it all went out the window again and it’s only now TWO AND A HALF YEARS LATER that I have started to take any interest in my appearance again! I had my first haircut in 3 years 2 weeks ago!

    Britney is doing great,let’s not be harsh and criticise but let her be. I would like to see an article praising up a young famous mum, rather than those pulling her down. Great article Heather, been reading for ages, but this is my first comment!

  • http://dish-it-trish.blogspot.com Trish D

    Great post. Not a fan of Brit, but that’s not the point, huh? Thanks for the reality check.

    Even as a 25 year-old “young mom” of a 16 month old, my knee-jerk reaction is to criticize her and say, “What an idiot”, but I have to stop myself and think about what horrible things people would say about me when they saw me shut my 5 month old’s foot in the car door bc I wasn’t paying attention. I was horrified when that happened and I probably would have wanted to commit suicide if I saw a picture of that on a magazine cover the next day.

    Just from that experience alone I have realized how horrifying being a superstar parent must be.

    I wish her all the best!

  • Jordan

    I have never considered myself a Britney fan. I never bought one of her albums, and I don’t know that I ever will, but I can totally give her credit for her getting songs stuck in my head. She’s catchy and lovable and I feel kinda’ bad for her. The mistakes that come with motherhood are just exacerbated by press attention. I think it’s cool that she’s not trying to be something she’s not. If her hair is dirty or she’s not wearing a bra or shoes, at least she’s not trying to please some tabloid reader 8 states away. Can you imagine trying to live your life to someone else’s standards like that? Yuck!!

  • http://:plantain.blogspot.com plantain

    Dooce, you got it right!
    I met Britney once on a music video shoot… she was a very friendly sweet young girl (this was about 3 years ago… right around when she married her friend in Vegas).
    http://tmz.com had video of her crying in a restaurant after she had tripped holding her baby in NY… and I really felt for her…
    I heard that her Matt Lauer interview did not involve any of her publicists/ managers/makeup or hair people (the last two being pretty obvious)….
    I get the sense that she’s at least trying to live as ‘normal’ a life as possible.. still going out to restaurants/ driving with her son/ playing on the beach…. if she and her kid were cloistered away in some compound in Malibu… and never saw the light of day for fear of being paparazzied to death…. she’d be freakin’ Michael Jackson…

  • http://www.faydean.typepad.com amy Jacobs

    First off, I have to say just how much you amaze me with your ability to see such the subtle things about life’s “this and that” and translate it so well in your writing. You are a great talent.

    Secondly, I have to agree with ya on this. I’ve thought the EXACT same thing about Mrs. Federline. You can’t judge her really. She is what she is, despite being famous. She’s soooo young. She is rather country and simple in many ways. And she’s traveling life’s road, just like so many like her, just in front of the whole world. I don’t like her music at all. I will say it’s catchy. But, I agree totally with the fact that she captivates you with her ease of being so amazingly beautiful while she performs and such. She’s got that “it” thing that draws us all in.

    But when that glossy image becomes scratched by REALITY, we all go, “Hey…where’s our polished pop icon that helps escape our own realities?” When she refelects back what we already live and relate to, we, as a society, grimace collectively. We want to be fooled into the assumption that if you only could look wonderful and move like a cat, you’d have a better life. I’m guilty, for sure. Not that I envied Britney really. She just provided a very nice distraction from life on the outside.

    I was very unsettled by her recent interview with Matt Lauer. Mainly cuz she looked so bad…her fake eyelashes applied incorrectly, her hair like a really bad dye job at the local redneck beauty salon…her horribly fitting trailer trash maternity wear…and that gum, Lord help us having to watch her smack that gum. I figured it MUST be Nicorette…since she was a smoker before getting pregnant. I know my poor husband flicks that gum like Chiclets when he’s under stress. Talking to Matt Lauer about how everyone thinks you’re one step away from living in a raised house in some swamp in Louisania because you just can’t swing real life and super stardom, calls for a dose of nicotine.

    But as I got over that initial reaction, I imagined what it must feel like to be her right now. Hugely pregnant, AGAIN (we all know she didn’t mean for that to happen…truly an Oops, I Did It Again), probably feeling like a hippo, still reeling from post partum hormones, trying to cope, as you said, with what motherhood brings…and marriage (if you can call it that). And then, in the midst of this having to put on some “fancy” clothes, do your hair up good and go on national television to talk about yourself in some detached manner. I can’t imagine how upsetting that must be.

    Or like the time she tripped and all the cameras caught her nearly drop her son. Hell, I’ve had my child fall down a full flight of stairs while I was sitting on the couch. As upset as I was, and no one saw me when it happened, poor Britney was seen by hundreds and then when she tried to retreat to a local coffe shop the patrons and wait staff just leared at her like she’d just crapped in the street…her crying with her child. People are so cruel. It’s harshly obvious how she was, is and will be fodder for our entertainment, and nothing more. When she got the lush praise of being a teen princess, she had no idea that’s what she was. But now? Now, it’s painfully obvious. A very harsh thing to realize in the midst of experiencing some of life’s most draining experiences…becoming a parent. But, it happens to all stars eventually…when they get old, get divorced, suffer a drug problem, get AIDS, or simple go out of favor. No one is a darling forever.

    So, like you, I see her in a much different light. And in all truth, I don’t envy her fame or fortune. Rather, I feel sorry for her and hope, someday, she can live her life in some kind of peace. And mostly, that her children can.

    Thanks for such an entertaining column. So glad I have you to read every day. And I know YOU know all to well how an “adoring public” can be so judgemental.

  • Me

    Goooder…I’m not going to start a war here. My point was, its America, technically, you DO have the right to not immunize your children. I believe you just have to sign a waiver at the dr’s office saying you understand the risks. Then you take a note from the dr to the school, and its accepted. (I think it became an option when they first started linking increased autism rates to increased vaccination rates, from an article I read). Anyway, America = freedom. Mostly.

    With that said, my kids and my dogs have had all their shots, even the Lyme vaccine one.

  • Me

    Goooder…I’m not going to start a war here. My point was, its America, technically, you DO have the right to not immunize your children. I believe you just have to sign a waiver at the dr’s office saying you understand the risks. Then you take a note from the dr to the school, and its accepted. America = freedom. Mostly.

    With that said, my kids and my dogs have had all their shots, even the Lyme vaccine one.

  • http://mylifetransformed.com Mary Jo

    I loved your article. I agree with what you wrote about Britney. I feel awful that she has to withstand the judgement of the world like she does. I know it was her choice to go into entertaining, but every person deserves respect. I think that she’s a young mother, making normal everyday mistakes, and yet she’s persecuted for them. People are so judgmental.

  • http://alexandrialeigh.com/coan Alexandrialeigh

    I completely agree with you, 100%.

    I was watching the “My Sweet 16″ reality show on MTV last night (can’t believe I just admitted that, but there you go), and I am constantly amazed at the way reality television and the Internet are affecting teenagers now. Imagine the tweens whose MySpace accounts will still be on the Internet when they’re 22 and trying to find their first jobs out of college — you better believe employers will make use of Google, and probably search other web sites, too, to find out everything they can about potential employees.

    I shudder to think of the things I would’ve put on a blog had I started one in my teens. And just thinking of how much I’ve changed as I’ve gotten older is enough to make me frightened of how technology will affect me later in life, too. There’s much more of a record of everything we do now. And Britney came of age in the public eye–remember when she claimed she wouldn’t have sex until marriage? I’m sure when she said it she really believed it; but how can you know how your opinions will change as you get older? It’s impossible to predict. It’s like having someone follow you around and record every single thing you say, just so they can prove you wrong about everything later on.

  • http://vindauga.typepad.com Lisa V

    I think she worked so hard to become famous, and she doesn’t have the maturity -she is so young- to see what she needs to do. If she hates the stalking of the photogs and tabloids, she needs to give it all up. If she moves back to Louisiana she might start seeing part of a normal life again. I think it’s awful the way she is treated- and believe me I am no fan. But she has to do something to stop it rather than complain about it.

  • Me

    Amanda B. hit the nail on the head:

    “From what I’ve observed, I think Britney has very few people in her life who she can really trust (including in her immediate family) and very few places where she is safe. I think it’s a situation where she will have to learn to parent herself and that takes a lot of time and a good bit of trial and error. At least it did for me. ”

    I love that. Exactly.

  • http://smoness.livejournal.com/ smoness

    Kick-ass article! …Come on, what mother or babysitter on this planet hasn’t left the baby alone for 43.8 seconds to brush their teeth or pee for the first time in two days?? All the while willing the baby not to ingest clorox or bonk its head on the coffee table while you’re wiping your ass. Babies are soft and squishy so that we can learn from our mistakes without killing anyone.
    I have no doubt that Brit loves her baby and wants the best for him. She’s learning just like anyone else who has their own or taken care of someone else’s children. It’s just the price she has to pay for being in the public eye: If we’re not hating her for being talented, rich and beautiful then we have to hate her for going and starting a family instead of entertaining us with her shiny outfits… how dare she!!!

  • Sandy

    I have 3 kids..ages 7, 5 and 22months and there have been a million different times that I have stepped out my front door in a t-shirt, sweat pants and flip flops. Did I care? Not really. The baby was going to spit up on me whether or not I was dressed nice, or sloppy. The girls were going to wipe their snotty noses and hands on my clothes whether or not they were “nice” or otherwise. Did I pray that nobody I knew saw me? Oh hell yes!

    I have made plenty of mistakes with my kids, a fact that I’m sure they will tell me when they are 16 and hating me. But was it in the public’s glaring eye? Not unless you count the checkers at Wal-Mart. Does that make me any different or better than Britney? I don’t think so, but it doesn’t change the fact that I don’t like some of her excuses. She sat her child on her lap while she was driving. Wrong? yes. Should she have attributed it to being Southern? No. I’m Southern, and my dad did the same to me when I was little. Does that make it right? No. Would I do it with my own children? No. Why? Because I freakin know better..and I was 22, 24 & 28 when my kids were born.

    If she’s going to act they way she does, (which is no different than 1,000 non-famous people)and if she’s going to dress the way she does, and she’s going to be married to who she’s married too, then by God, OWN IT! Don’t make excuses. Admit when you’re wrong, don’t play it off.

    I try my very best not to judge her. Sometimes it’s hard not too, but I still try.

  • momma 2 angels

    oops 2 many typo’s. must slow down defend britney

  • Korey Beyersdorf

    Here’s the thing I love about Dooce – she always makes me think. Britney has been such a disappointment to me, after having been such a huge fan. I can’t stand to even watch her these days because she has not lived up to her potential, and it seems that she has no one to blame for that but herself. Which makes me very sad.
    But after reading Heather’s article, I can see Britney’s side. Not that I agree with her side, but I can see it. And I appreciate having someone make me see her side of things. It makes me be not so judgemental. It makes me be more understanding and compassionate. It makes me be less of a snob, and more of a human being.
    So while I still can’t stand the new and un-improved Britney, I can at least try to be less of a hater towards her. I think that is progress. For me.

  • http://randomkiwi.typepad.com randomkiwi

    I thought that was a good bit of writing, and to add my two pence: can people not just accept that someone with all that fame and money could have come to the conclusion that there are more interesting and important things to do than look pretty? why does this freak everyone out so much?? i like the fact that she’s just rolling with the casual, and let’s face it, with a husband like that, she’s clearly got more things to worry about than f’ing accessories! Anyway, i think it would be a ‘good thing’ if folk could lighten up on judging someone just because they’ve given up (temporarily?) playing at being a barbie doll – and ‘shock horror’ maybe wear an outfit more than once.
    thanks.

  • http://www.theskyisfallingin.com Cloudy

    I appreciate your perspective & you have helped me to have a little compassion for her, but darnit, that gum has got to go!

  • Sera

    I feel for Britney. I wish they would just leave her alone. She’s a human being. She makes good and bad decisions and has to live with the consequences just like the rest of us. She’s also very young. She will learn from her successes and mistakes. People should stop scrutinizing her.

    On a more superficial note, I think she should just let her hair grow out to her natural color. It’s probably beautiful.

  • http://www.pretendingsanity.com pretendingsanity

    I’ve never been a Britney fan. I’m not sure why. Maybe because she came out when I was a senior in High School, she was my age and everyone was drooling all over her. But recently I’ve defended her more than I care to admit to. I feel sorry for her. Being a mom is hard. Raising a little one while pregnant is hard and doing it all in the face of the media has got to be hard.

    I guess I defend her out of a matter of human decency. We’re all deeply flawed, and we don’t need to point it out to each other EVERY WAKING MINUTE.

  • http://www.jenireno.blogspot.com Jeni

    What a touchy subject Britney has become. I’m so tired of all the hate that surrounds her. I could care less that she married that loser. I think she just wants to exercise her own choices in her life, which is something I would presume she’s not really ever gotten to do. You almost have to respect that after all the marketing and pushing and molding that they have done with her, she’s willing to let it go and just attempt to live her life in the most normal way possible.

    The really sad part isn’t her choices, it’s the reaction to them. At every turn, she seems to be fighting and defending herself. It has to be difficult to not be accepted for your true self.

    Society is overly critical, harsh, and delusional. Britney’s problems only highlight our problems as a whole.

  • Janell

    Personally, I’ve never liked Britney better than I do right now. Part of my heart just aches for her because she is seemingly in a bad relationship, etc., but being a new mommy is hard, even for famously wealthy people! I think that it must be really hard to combine that pop princess with new mommy. Plus, if it isn’t hard enough, Sean Preston is just born and now another? I can’t imagine anything tougher.

  • momma 2 angels

    Heather, great article. She is a mesmerizing and adorable. So she’s a train wreck some days? Most of us have been at some point of our lives, especially during early motherhood. But we are not stalked by parastites with cameras who make major cash the moment we slip with our kids in our arms. I think she’s holding up as good as can be expected and as much as people bag on her, she still has that “thing” that keeps folks interested. I think she is a mainstay in pop culture and just watch, the tide will turn for her in judgement-ville. American’s love a good comeback story.

  • http://jjbofamily.blogspot.com/ mrsjenna

    Long time lurker, first time poster. Love your site and read it daily.

    Love the post on AlphaMom.

    As a mom of 2 under 2, at times I feel as though I have completely lost it. Sometimes I can’t even remember what I did a minute ago…did I change that diaper? Not so sure, so let me do it again. What makes me sane? Seeing that celebrities have brain farts, too. We are all human, we make mistakes, and we try to learn from them. I almost wish some light would be shed on other celebrity moms and their so-called bad-parenting. I think a lot of moms would feel better about having their own brain farts here and there…

  • h2obaby73

    Heather, first thing that struck me was your comment on how harsh moms can be. I loved this. I laughed because you are right on the mark

    “Now she has to answer to the harshest and meanest critics in the world: other mothers.”

    My son and Leta are the same age. Ever since becoming a mom my self confidence was shot to hell, I questioned myself constantly and I can’t stand what I call the mommy competition. I don’t play the game of my son can do this and this, etc. The mommy competition frustrates me completely. Women in general are catty and harsh but when they become moms beware.

    P.S. This week I transformed from “Momma” to “Mommie”, I love it.

  • Me

    Heck, I know I’m not the only one obsessively refreshing this blog..but…

    2 more things (like I haven’t said enough, but hey, its a slow day at work):

    1) I hope Brit is ushering in the “brunette is hot, fake blonde is not” era- I love the new color

    2) I know K-Fed isn’t ‘all that’, but c’mon, is it really that bad? What have they done that Tomkat hasn’t? Or 90% of the other celebrities? Or most of us? Fallen in love with the wrong person? At the wrong time? Heavens to betsy…Granted he isn’t perfect either, but stop knockin it. You’re not married to him, you don’t know what kind of person he is, you’re only judging what you read/see on tv/mags.

    and 3) anybody want to bet that the next Brit-bashing photo involves Sean P. not buckled in to a Wally World shopping cart?

  • Kari

    Oh, Britney.

    I once loved her the way you loved her, Heather. I scoured the music video channels looking for “Overprotected” or “Don’t let me be the last to know.”

    I’m not a mom and I don’t mean to be a motherjudger, but what surprises me is how many people think she’s going to one day drop K-Fed and the weight and have a total image recovery.

    I see her aging like Elizabeth Taylor, so that years from now, we’ll have a hard time believing that this bizarre celebrity who cannot competently present a Golden Globe was once the Most Beautiful Woman in the World.

  • http://budapestgirl.blogspot.com AlieMalie

    I cannot fathom how lonely it must be to live the life of Britney Spears. Wanting privacy for her family and child, yet continuing to put herself out in all forms of media pleading for said privacy.

  • http://www.maniacaldays.blogspot.com Maniacal

    I wrote something about this on my site not to long ago. I hate being a link whore but: http://maniacaldays.blogspot.com/2006/05/britney-what-is-it-good-for.html

    In short it said: Her son and my daughter are about the same age, and if I had paprazzi following me around all the time, I’d be on CNN everyday. And most of you would be too!

    Not a huge Brit fan, but people should cut her a break and the news should follow things that are important like the war!

  • http://svrspy.blogspot.com Scarlet

    I’m still pro-Britney. I think she was trying to look natural for the interview, like she would any other day. Of course it isn’t going to look as good when she is all made up and spent hours in the hair and makeup chair. She’s pregnant, she wants to be comfortable.

    (The dark hair is good though. Good call, Britney!)

  • Fitzgiggles

    It just goes to show, no matter how many drivers and nannies you can afford – motherhood can make you loopy.

  • Jacko

    Oh, and I kinda like the dark hair on her…and now I will leave Brittney alone.

  • Vida

    I’m not a mother, but I remember my parents’ methods pretty well. I all but idolize them now, and they did some really stupid things when I was a kid. I got left outside the library for hours in the middle of South Dakota November. I bashed my head on every piece of furniture and every remotely sharp corner in our house. I ate a cricket, once. I almost drowned when my family was busy playing in the deep end of our friends’ pool and my mom was lying out on the deck. My brother noticed at the last minute and pushed me up out of the water.

    I could go on forever. After all this, though, I can still say I have and did have awesome parents. Britney nearly drops her baby on his head? So what? How many mothers haven’t done something like that? Baby in the car with no car seat? Yes, that’s stupid, and almost every parent should know better. But how many mothers have done something equally stupid that endangered their children’s lives? It might not have been a car seat, but surely in some other department…

    She might have nannies to help her out and all sorts of people worrying about her all the time, but she’s still a freaking human being. It doesn’t matter how many other imperfect human beings are fluttering around her all the time. She’ll still make mistakes. I don’t know a mother who hasn’t.

  • tusky

    I’m sorry, I don’t think Brittany is a bad mom, but her wardrobe shows a total lack of common sense…if she wants the press to give her privacy, she should stop walking around naked.

  • http://tarawhitney.typepad.com/ Tara Whitney

    i totally totally TOTALLY agree with everything you said. so much that my throat clenched at the very end. i feel so deeply for her in her young naive motherhood. i remember it being just like that. crazy, messy, wrinkly, and a lot of just doing my best.

  • alidancer

    I just feel bad for her – I am SO glad all my awkwardness was not put on public display (or, at least not nationally) when I was younger. Hell, even the awkwardness I have now…

    But to be totally honest, I would have used all that money to dress appropriately, hire the help I needed to stay sane and poised, and kicked that white trash husband to the curb before he had a chance to bleed my baby’s college fund dry. I really hope she pulls it together – all the negative feedback must be so painful. For all her mistakes, she does have an innocent quality that makes you root for her….

  • http://jellyfishonline.blogspot.com jellyfish

    Great post. It brought back vividly the first time I saw the video for ‘Baby One More Time.’ I was sixteen, and felt seized by a sudden and uncontrollable urge to roll my school uniform skirt up several inches, pigtail my hair and round-off my way down the school corridors. I contented myself with rewinding the tape (tape! my God) many times so that my girlfriends and I could try to replicate that incredible ‘growl’ she makes at the back of her throat at the beginning of the song. Hott.

    Being a child performer is a weird way to grow up, and it’s especially hard to mature from adolescnece to adulthood in the public eye. So much exposure, so young, is not healthy, and without someone keeping very tight reigns… people can easily go awry. I instinctively look to the parents and wonder why they chose that kind of life for their children and whose interests they had at heart – although I realise that in expressing such opinions about Britney’s mother I’m probably being just as self-righteous and judgemental as anyone who critises Britney’s own parenting.

    My gut predicts a huge comeback, but not for a few years to see it.

  • http://www.baketown.blogspot.com Bake Town

    I see people like that walking around here every day. Brit should move to Bakersfield.

  • HDC

    I agree with you fundamentally. We as mothers and imperfect humans all make mistakes and should be allowed to do so witout criticism. However, anyone who fails to put their baby in a safety seat while driving has zero latitude. That’s easily a fatal mistake.

    Granted, the publicity she got for thst one has done tons for publicizing chil car safety, so I suppose some good has come of it.

  • http://mnlove.blogspot.com/ Kim Rodgers

    The only thing I disagree with you on is your defending her driving with Sean P. in her lap. That is NOT OK. That is not just an inexperienced, young mom mistake. I’m sorry, but she should know better. No matter how “country” she is.

  • J I L L

    Amen, sister. It’s refreshing to see someone fumble through life as we all do at one point or another… If Britney could gain anything positive thru the harsh public judgement, I hope it would be for her to realize that she has lifted a weight off many women who feel inadequate as wives, mothers, role models. That even with billions, the publicists, sylists, and nannies…even then, we are all human. I hope someone has told her this…If we were BFF’s (as I’ve always thought we should be), I would tell her so…and maybe to throw on some shoes when using a public shitter.

  • Ashley

    I totally see where you’re coming from, Heather.

    I completely sympathize with her.

    I also have to say, someone commented above and said something about how often we see Britney without Sean P. and how she must have nannies around the clock, etc. etc.

    I know she has nannies and whatnot, but I’ve barely seen any pictures of Britney without Sean P. since the little guy was born. I’ve seen a few here and there of her out at night, but I think out of all the celebrities, I’ve seen her with her child the most.

    And as far as this whole “Britney is a role model” thing. Who, exactly, is Britney a role model to? I don’t think there are many people left who are modeling their lives after Britney Spears. She isn’t a role model at this point, she’s a person who other people criticize to make themselves feel like better people/parents. And honestly, that’s a real shame.

    It’s tough being a new mother. I think she’s just doing the best she can, like we all do.

  • Jacko

    I really think we should all take a moment to sit back and reflect upon the Dooce.com Comment Policy (d) Please leave Britney Spears alone.

    That is all.

  • dooce

    Jlemm, excellent comment. i’m so glad there isn’t a photograph of the time Leta fell off the end of our bed onto her head because I was off using the bathroom by myself for the first time in two months.

    I think some of you have missed my point ENTIRELY about just how judgmental mothers are of other mothers.

  • http://youmustchill.blogspot.com Ashley

    Heather. I caught a negative commenter from your blog. He called me a boring dumbass. He commented as anonymous.

    My stupid little blog that no one reads, and I have a negative commenter.

    And I caught it from you.

    I think I might cry now. How do you do this? I might have an emotional breakdown for being called a waste of bandwidth. I have no idea who you’ve kept this site open with all the criticism of your parenting skills.

    I commend you on your bravery, and any other parent who blogs and gets shit for it.

    This is irrelevant, I know, feel free to delete it. I was just kind of shocked! A comment! Me! On my blog! From a mean person!

  • Angela

    I think that Brittney is making the same mistakes that every new mother makes, but hers are made in the glaring public eye. Even though I might not agree with her decisions, I just want to give her a hug and tell her it will be alright.

  • http://overdressedconfessions.blogspot.com/ kalisah

    I enjoyed your take on it. I don’t necessarily think she’s a bad mom, but I still think she ought to hire someone who will tell her to put some clothes on aready and spit out the gum dammit before she goes on the Today show.