Crisp and uncomplicated

A simple, elegant touch to any outfit, and yes, that includes yoga pants and a tank top.

I put my hand up on your hip

… and then touch my phone and now whatever was on your hip will end up on my face.

Inspired by a month of birthdays

First person to make a joke about the elephants gets a poke in the butt.

Winter blues

Because of my eyes, because of Marlo’s eyes, because of the ocean, because of the sky.

Ideas for Mother’s Day

Meanwhile, my own mother will be receiving a coupon for “one free lecture to me about the evils of Obamacare.”

Hankering

Because I am the valedictorian of dropping phones.

Hankering

In the mood to turn down the saturation.

And then I adopted a leprechaun and named him Larry Mullen, Jr.

This shit is magically delicious.

For your lady

Seriously. Do not piss her off.

Since the whole house is already littered with it

My girls have been trying to send me a message.