Heater, Mother of Lance

Dogs Love Weekends

Chuck and I had a quick photoshoot recently, wherein Jon teased him with the Nylabone and I tried diligently to capture Precious Moments. Maybe only other dog owners will understand this, but it’s FUCKING HARD to get clear photographs of a dog when that dog is cranked!, and his father is holding his favorite toy mere inches out of reach.

  • the husband

    2003/01/17 at 5:36 pm

    Chuck fucking rules.

  • Slocore

    2003/01/17 at 5:43 pm

    Chuck is the shit!

  • the mighty jimbo

    2003/01/17 at 5:49 pm

    up chuck! up!

    sorry. that was lame.

  • Desiree

    2003/01/17 at 6:36 pm

    Chuck has such beautiful pearly whites! Don’t know if you’re planning to add any human babes to the pack, but speaking from experience, don’t be surprised (or feel guilty) that if/when you do that you will still have taken more pictures of Chuck than of them. 🙂

  • antisocial diva

    2003/01/17 at 6:36 pm

    cute pics! one day you will end up making a site just for chuck like i did with my fur babies. 🙂 http://www.medfordpets.com

  • se

    2003/01/17 at 6:37 pm

    I love the up-the-snoot, eyes-buggin’ one especially. I can almost smell his breath.

  • Broch

    2003/01/17 at 6:55 pm

    I don’t know, in a few of those shots, it doens’t really look like a Nylabone.

  • r3

    2003/01/17 at 7:04 pm

    What a cutie-pie! 🙂

  • Red

    2003/01/17 at 7:13 pm

    Chuck’s coat glows. Suave?

    (update your copyright?)

  • Tom

    2003/01/17 at 7:29 pm

    Look at the widdle ponub!


    That last picture is so fucking adorable!

  • Heather #2

    2003/01/17 at 7:47 pm

    That song fucking rules! (Hey, Dirty, how ya like me now?! I’ve been down with the f*bombs for, like, a month now.)

  • Katie

    2003/01/17 at 7:49 pm

    What kind of sick toy are you letting him play with?

  • Rebecca

    2003/01/17 at 8:13 pm

    Chuck’s teeth looks scary in the first few, but the last one is priceless =D

  • Totah DinÈ

    2003/01/17 at 8:32 pm

    I thought you said Chuck was calming down…

    He looks like Cujo Chuck in those pics. hehe

  • dooce

    2003/01/17 at 8:49 pm

    Heather #2: I fucking love you, you motherfucker.

  • e

    2003/01/17 at 9:03 pm

    i love chuck.

  • Rob

    2003/01/17 at 9:55 pm

    Man, now I want a dog. Unfortunately I can’t afford one right now. Bummer. I guess I’ll just have to keep reading about yours. Just wanted to say thanks for the site, never fails to make me laugh. And that song is very nice indeed.

  • Leslie

    2003/01/17 at 11:34 pm

    I think he is seriously the cutest dog I have ever seen!

  • poop on a creepy stick

    2003/01/18 at 1:38 am

    chuck is the cutest!!!!

    don’t you think new balances are an expensize chew toy…
    where is the rolled up newspaper…
    bad dog…

  • Dave

    2003/01/18 at 3:45 am

    Does it seem to anyone else that in the third picture from the top Chuck is giving his reasons for his stance on the war with Iraq?

    He looks like hes giving a speech.

  • flashy

    2003/01/18 at 6:29 am

    My thoughts about Chucks smart thinkings:
    1pic)”Throw me that fucking camera man, watch me catching it”.
    2) “I said the camera!”
    3) Dave’s one lol
    4) “I’m Marylin Monroe ah”
    5)”hand,stick,hand,stick..hand yum”
    7) “Im gonna pretend u didn’t mean that”
    8)”shush now”

  • lizzie

    2003/01/18 at 7:30 am

    strangest thing ever… i didn’t click your “this song” link because i was already listening to a cd and was too lazy to get up and turn it off. when i finished reading, i went back to at least take a peek at what the song was. and what song was coming from my cd player at that EXACT moment? “o is the one that is real,” my morning jacket. swear on my life.

  • Paul Gutman

    2003/01/18 at 8:32 am

    Gotta say, the storytelling arc from Ferocious Chuckô to Zonked Chuckô is excellent. Good composition, humane storytelling.

    Moreover, he mimics how I feel right now–snarly and sleepy.

  • the propagandist

    2003/01/18 at 8:56 am

    is that a bone or a human femur you found in your psycho ex-neighbor’s garbage?

  • anna

    2003/01/18 at 9:23 am

    why don’t you do some like these pics but with you as the subject and scrumptious jon elusively holding a taco bell tostada in front of your face. THAT i’d like to see.

  • K

    2003/01/18 at 12:14 pm

    I RUV puppers! PUPPERS!!!

  • peggy

    2003/01/18 at 3:32 pm

    I totally sympathize, about trying to get clear pictures when they’re spazzing out.
    I hope Chuck won’t take it the wrong way, but my little homo boy dog loves him.

  • blissbat

    2003/01/18 at 3:36 pm

    a.) CHUCK. gah.
    b.) Oh god. I was friends with part of that band in high school. Gak.

  • jimmypage

    2003/01/18 at 4:51 pm


    may the dogs of war be unleashed on you, d00ce, for making this a ‘dog-lover’ blog. i remember the gold old days… i could be wrong, but perhaps it’s the inner mormon in you. don’t get me wrong, i love the way u think heather. every other person that posts here comes for a reason. and then there are those rat-bastards, that donít have a take, to yet still graze in your pasture.

    alright, so you canít give us the latest digs on giovanni ribisi or some other cut-rate actor (ok..ok, gio was good in SPR), but simply put you’re in boring ‘ol mormon-mind-controlled utah. {end rant}.

    perhaps you can find an asian-mormon dba (amdba). think about the possibilities. exploit him. make him a star on the d00ce walk of fame…

    not in a bad way, though. you know how to free this hypothetical amdbaís mind. or, at the very least, fuck his head up so completely, that he (maybe even a she, for a changeÖ yeah, with pictures) would give you enough content to write a hunter s thompson-style book.

    can d00ce heal those in need of a perception change? or d00ce, d00ce baby, are you the anti-christ?.

    OK.. i admit that iíll still be reading the chuck ones (my wife is simply enamored with him). and by the way, youíve seen, youíve read – we all miss the photos. lates.

  • the propagandist

    2003/01/18 at 5:35 pm

    oh – and “his father”?

    please. get pregnant. you need kids that are not entirely covered in fur.

    or if they are, do not look like chihuahuas when you shave them.

  • Natasha

    2003/01/18 at 5:57 pm

    The dog is totally cute…what kind is he?

  • Amanda

    2003/01/18 at 7:25 pm

    Chuck is Too Damn Shiny.
    Its looks like you’ve shellacked him!

  • dirty

    2003/01/18 at 10:41 pm

    maybe you should take a look at this website


  • Chad's Favorite Bridesmaid

    2003/01/19 at 12:13 am

    Chuck kicks ass. If you make it down to the SF Bay Area again, I’ve got the name of a dog park he’d love. P.S. Try a higher speed film–at least 400 ASA (if that’s still too slow, as he does look like a speed demon, try 800).

  • Tina

    2003/01/19 at 7:43 am

    He’s so cute, especially when he’s baring his teeth and his ears are flipped up.

  • rosebaby

    2003/01/19 at 8:31 am

    chuck is the man. the last shot is very nice, but of course cute sleeping pics are a bit easier 🙂 he’s a beautiful dog.

  • K

    2003/01/19 at 10:41 am

    ee! nice design change! i feel like jem!

  • me

    2003/01/19 at 11:26 am

    Chuck looked scary the first couple of pictures.

  • heather

    2003/01/19 at 1:14 pm

    photographing tigger and chieka remind me of that x files episode with the creatures who “hide in the light.” fucking impossible.

  • niurope

    2003/01/19 at 2:02 pm

    i don’t like dogs. this is coming from someone who had to spend close to three hours yesterday with two large golden retreviers (who were cute by the way) but by the end of my session, I smelt like “dog” and found it hard to breath!! that’s just my issue. how do people deal with that “dog smell”?

  • rosebaby

    2003/01/19 at 3:59 pm

    re: smell… showers. both human and canine. really. if the dog is remotely clean you can wash your hands and be done with it. on the other hand, if the dog is a regular ol’ dog, he’s probably gonna smell like one. i think it bothers some more than others.

  • martha

    2003/01/19 at 4:20 pm

    mmm…my morning jacket.

    and holy crap chuck is cute. not as cute as my dog, but pretty damn near.

  • Totah DinÈ

    2003/01/19 at 6:06 pm

    I like the new digs :o)

  • Kevynn Malone

    2003/01/19 at 7:18 pm

    “Chopper Sic Balls!”

  • Chakriya

    2003/01/19 at 10:11 pm

    cute dog though i wouldn’t want to piss him off. he looks like he can bite my boobs off.=)


    2003/01/20 at 6:02 am

    Gorgeousness and gorgeocity.

  • Michelle

    2003/01/20 at 9:01 am

    My Morning Jacket *and* photos of Chuck. Really, you are too generous.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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