An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation


  • Lovely redesign, definitely more cowbell – bring the cowbell on, more blue oyster cult! mmm, okay, that was wrong… just wrong. so wrong that it’s right? i have to try to find that moby video where christopher walken dances now… keep up the great work dooce and blurb:)

  • amy


  • Gia

    Yeay! Love to have more cowbell!


    Thrilled to have you back.

  • Adorable!

    Dooce 5.0 looks excellent and it is so wonderful to have you back. I’m not sure if telling you congratulations is appropriate but I think it might well be in order. You rock.

  • brandon

    He sorta looks like those kids from the movie Village of the Damned.

  • Congrats, doOce! I also like the new design: simple yet lively. Looking forward to reading/seeing more of your doOcery 🙂

  • if there is one thing i want to learn from the years of my life i am wasting by obsessively clicking on your website, it’s how to take really cool pictures like that.

    and make good poop jokes.

  • I love, love, love the new site design. I have to say my favorite part is the Google ad that says: Cowbell for less.

  • Absolutely fabulous new design. You can always use more cowbell…

    And looking forward to the daily photos…Twin is a cutie. Being a twin myself, I can honestly say that I answer to “twin”, my sister’s name, and also just hey you. So Twin is a perfectly acceptable nickname.

  • Kelly


  • Also, the columns go into the page background in Internet Explorer for Mac OS X….. and I know that anybody who uses it is “being a pussy and not downloading a better browser” but…… you know….. I’m just telling you. 😛

  • If the right column goes to the bottom, you probably have to take a pixel away from each column’s width.

  • The Former Inmate

    Well…I’m getting used to the new design. It’s neat. It’s clean. It’s actually almost understated.

    But I must say: I thought that thing was a purse with a cell phone inside….the Cowbell idea took a while to click. I do great on Rorschachs, by the way.

    Welcome back. Glad you’re feeling better. Oh, deep water IS pretty damned scary.

  • A new website, complete with a Saturday Night Live reference? I’m in heaven.

    Glad you’re back Dooce, we missed you.

  • eco2geek

    The links that are on the righthand side of the page with “real” browsers like Mozilla are at the bottom of the page in Internet Explorer 5.5 (which is all I can use at work.) It’s truly a POS.

    HTML tag test

  • I’d like a cowbell. As for camera envy, I prefer mine where you have to stand on your head, squint, sing the national anthem and turn on all lights within 100 miles to get a picture.

    Yea! for Dooce!

  • Welcome back Dooce! The website looks amazing – and I’m with Wixlet, the case of camera envy has me putting pennies in a jar – I want the D70!

  • leigh

    Cowbells! Just when I thought it couldn’t get better! Love your redesign, and a gorgeous pic of Twin …
    Glad you’re back home, hope you continue to feel better.

  • i have an itchy, uncomfortable case of camera envy.

  • eco2geek

    I liked the red background (and the red/pink theme) a lot better than the grey one. But…

    I love the way that, when you go to another page within the site, it doesn’t seem to reload the whole thing, it just loads the new content.

    Glad you’re out of the hospital, too.

  • Looking good. Loving the added cowbells.

  • More cowbell! It’s good to see you really exploring the space. 🙂 By the way, I have to tell you that I’m hopelessly smitten with your entire adorable family.

  • I’ve got a fever… and the only cure is MORE COWBELL.

    Nice redesign! Looks clean and sharp. Kudos to you and Jon for the layout and coding. I’m looking forward to seeing more of your photos, too!

  • Better than I could have dreamed. Welcome back.

  • jeff

    Welcome back, love the new website. Love the cowbell!

  • I’m a doocaholic, so I’m well chuffed to see not only the Dooce herself, but the website too looking better than ever!

    Fab photo; ‘twin’ looks positively Dickensian in his urchinness.

    I ‘heart’ dooce (includng dog-dooce, man-dooce and mini-dooce) xxx

  • Tim

    Hello, Twin! Why have you been relegated to stand out back by the refuse bins?

  • Love the re-design!! I’m so glad that you’re doing better!!

  • Shelly

    Simply loving it!

  • sabrina

    I am loving the new look! Glad to have you back home and sharing your life with us!

  • Twin, you are lookin’ good with the redesign!

  • I LOVE the new look.

    And I’m totally laughing that you can’t tell your twin nephews apart. So, evidently they’re both that cute?

  • owen: it’s already a gray border added by the CSS.

    thanks for the well wishes! this is all so crazy!

  • jen

    Nice redesign – ace – and GREAT to see you home, Heather! 😀 Lovely photo too. Good digital cameras kick ass!

  • It’s going to get annoying to add that grey border around the image everytime you add a new one. In my expert opinion I would suggest you use a css border:10px gray border. and as Mase said welcome back.

  • I’ve got a fever… and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL!

    You are truly amazing…. Thank you for sharing all of your self and your life.

    And funny as hell.

  • Kat

    You can tell how often he must go outside, his hair is so blonde.

  • Hello, Twin!

  • The new site looks great! Congrats and well done. 🙂

  • Molly

    Great picture! 🙂
    Great site! Renovations are lovely!

  • Absolutely adorable. Love the new site.

  • I need MORE COWBELL!!!! I love that SNL skit and my friends and I were just talking about that after going to a football game and watching this chubby band kid bang away on a cowbell- so glad I am not a high school kid anymore.

    Also glad that you are back- sleeping, and writing- what would I do without my Dooce fix!!! God I love you guys…

  • love the search categories and daily nuggets. and of course, the cowbell… don’t fear the reaper! 🙂

  • laura

    Nice new design. You picked cowbells to see what the google ads would do with it, didn’t you? ;>

  • Dear Dooce & Jon the SuperCoder,
    Love the new design, but I hope you’re not getting permanently rid of the “Currently” columns because they made me so very very happy every time I read them.

    Hurray for the return of Dooce! 🙂

  • Hi Heather and Family,

    The redesign is really funky but most importantly I’m glad that you feel your on the road to recovery. Your strength and sense of humour really comes across in your writing and I’ve learnt a lot about the Mormon faith since finding your website 😉 Take care of yourself.

  • uh uh uh – i get to be one of the first 100 commenters! JAY! never thought that would happen. but now i can tell you “in person” and don’t have to bug jon about how AWESOME YOU ARE! i have been thinking about you guys a lot and i’m sooo glad you’re better. you are better, aren’t you? you sound better.. anyway – i love the new design and “hi twin”.

  • Sarah

    The world is truly a better place for having you in it. I love that you share your life with all of us! You are a superstar! Love the new site!

  • Sasha

    I was hoping the redesign would finally allow all of us who haven’t been able to see any of the pictures or graphics for MONTHS to see them again. I really had been looking forward to that – but no Leta, Chuck or cowbells (they are mentioned in the comments, so there must be some, right?) for me… 🙁 sooo sad. I’ll read you anyway. Glad you are feeling better!

  • welcome back, heather. you are the bravest, best mommy ever for getting the help you need– and being so generous as to tell the world about it. i think you are a rock star-badass-hero for doing so. go you! 🙂

    p.s. the fact that you can’t tell urchin 1 from urchin 2 just makes you cooler. i can’t tell twins apart either. great pic. 😀

    p.p.s. i thought the cowbell was a purse too, and i LOVED that snl skit. sigh.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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