the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Obligatory Flower Picture from the Stalker’s Perspective

  • Heatheranne

    2004/09/12 at 5:43 am

    You’ve really got this stalker thing down. But again, great photo.

  • Yamila

    2004/09/12 at 5:49 am

    good photo
    but why a photo from a stalkers perspective?

  • dänika

    2004/09/12 at 6:10 am

    Beautiful, Heather! I’m enjoying the stalker’s perspective.

  • jess

    2004/09/12 at 6:31 am


  • Chessy

    2004/09/12 at 7:00 am

    Heather, I love this pic! I am particularly enamored with the fuzzy outline of a person, (Jon?) on the other side. 🙂

    “How do I love you?
    I have stalked you,
    So, yeah, that way”

  • beerzie yoink

    2004/09/12 at 6:54 am


  • kdub

    2004/09/12 at 7:33 am

    I keep expecting the picture to slowly shift focus to hubby and baby in the background like in the movies…

    And it looks more like distant adoration than stalking to me. After all, I’m sure your heart is smiling with love.

  • Lisa

    2004/09/12 at 7:47 am

    Haunting photo. Its good.

    Fingers and toes x’d for you for tomorrow’s MRI. I’m a mama too. I get it.


  • maxigumee

    2004/09/12 at 7:48 am

    This one’s perdy. 🙂

  • Alex

    2004/09/12 at 8:28 am

    Did you take that with manual or auto focus?

  • Jenny

    2004/09/12 at 8:29 am

    hahahaha very nice

  • Jenn

    2004/09/12 at 8:30 am

    Loving the pictures. Keep clickin’. 🙂

  • Jenn

    2004/09/12 at 8:31 am

    Hmm. Doesn’t seem my comment showed up. If you get this one, I dig your pictures. 🙂

  • Robin

    2004/09/12 at 8:34 am

    Gorgeous, but I’m worried about the amount of time you’re spending in the bushes. It’s itchy in there.

    Good luck to you and Leta tomorrow. My daughter’s a week younger than Leta, and I know I would be freaking out.

  • Mir

    2004/09/12 at 8:36 am

    Embrace your stalker instincts, I say!

    Deep breathing during the MRI. She’ll be fine and so will you. 🙂

  • Cristina

    2004/09/12 at 9:19 am

    Good luck with Leta’s MRI tomorrow.
    From what you have told us about Leta, I think I have the floor thing figured out: She likes to put her feet in her mouth and she knows how dirty the floor is. She is just trying to keep those feet nice and clean for later. Can you blame her? Who likes eating dirty feet.

    BTW, I LOVE that you have advertisements for cowbells on your site!

  • kim

    2004/09/12 at 10:03 am

    i love the picture but i really wanted to say good luck tomorrow. i’m sure she’ll be just fine and again – positive germany vibes and good thoughts are on the way over…

  • Shiz (Sharon)

    2004/09/12 at 10:46 am


    Toes crossed here, too.

  • Manda

    2004/09/12 at 10:51 am

    Good luck with the MRI. I’d be nervous, too, but I’m sure it will be fine. Give her a kiss for me.

  • mari

    2004/09/12 at 11:02 am

    Lovely picture.

    Sending good thoughts your way re Leta’s MRI. As I’m sure you know, PCMC is a fantastic hospital (from someone who used to work there). I know you guys will be just fine. Hang in there.

  • Regan

    2004/09/12 at 11:52 am

    good lord I wish I were rich and could afford that camera. the pictures come out so great!!

    Anyone want to hire someone who’s a few months short of a PhD and sick of her puny stipend???

  • D

    2004/09/12 at 12:02 pm

    The best of luck, the sweetest of smiles, and the wish that Leta is ok.

  • Liz Stalker

    2004/09/12 at 12:10 pm

    As a Stalker, I can truly say that is a great photograph!

  • jane doe

    2004/09/12 at 12:19 pm

    I know that Leta will be just fine and dandy. Babies are amazingly resilient even though they may not look like it!

  • Tim

    2004/09/12 at 2:20 pm

    Great photo!I am sure the MRI will go fine. Sending good vibes Leta’s way.

  • Leslie

    2004/09/12 at 7:05 pm

    Something to lighten your mood hopefully:

    My boyfriend didn’t walk until very late (almost 2, I think). His mother took him to the doc and found nothing physically wrong with him. Then he took notice of his 2 older sisters. It was determined that he didn’t walk simply because he didn’t have to. They carried him everywhere he needed to go. He’s still a little lazy like that. 🙂

  • diippi

    2004/09/12 at 5:37 pm

    Dont you worry…Sometimes babies are just lazy..
    My niece (bro’s daughter ) was just like that…to lazy to walk.. All the doctors scared us..but she is absolutely fine..

  • Chenny

    2004/09/12 at 5:38 pm

    Great photo.. love the colour contrasts. The D70 is such a great camera…

  • Amanda B.

    2004/09/12 at 5:45 pm

    Awesome picture. Brings back such memories….ah…

    Prayers for tommorow. May Leta touch down with her Mama’s grace.

  • Lorie

    2004/09/12 at 5:46 pm

    Medical procedures and babies don’t seem to mix – at least they don’t at my house. Breathe deep like the other commentor said, and it will be over quick. My thoughts are with you, Jon and Leta. Internet mojo is powerful! 😉

  • jm

    2004/09/12 at 7:16 pm

    Hey! I was a torticollis baby too! (Now I’m 38.) I’m sending positive, positive vibes to Leta right…now….

    I still have a little blip on my MRI at the base of my skull from way back then. So, keep breathing. I also have (under my hair, where you can feel it with your fingers) what my sisters charitably refer to as my “butthead.” So Leta has a much more perfect head than I do.

    My mom had to manipulate my head and neck and legs and feet and I (am told that I) cried and cried. I never crawled…I hitched myself along like a little army person. But I did finish a 10K and climbed some wicked vertical rock in North Conway, NH in my late twenties so her attentiveness paid off. But I am sure that it was awful for her as I was her first and the whole thing was very mysterious back then too.

    Know that we’re all thinking of you here at my house… jm, ak, coco and dave

  • Krystal

    2004/09/12 at 7:41 pm

    that’s a really lovely photo. I was in best buy today and saw the nikon D70 and thought of you =]

    I hope everything goes smoothly tomorrow for Leta.

  • Kathy

    2004/09/12 at 7:54 pm

    I understand being nervous over the MRI. My 23-year old daughter needs to have a CT scan (probably nothing serious) and I am as nervous as if she were a baby!

  • lynne

    2004/09/12 at 8:30 pm

    How bout a Johnny Jump Up bouncer and some fun bouncy music to motivate her?Sometimes it takes them awhile to figure it out.But hanging from the doorjam seems to make them really happy.

  • anothermama

    2004/09/12 at 8:35 pm

    Deep breaths. Leta will be fine. Remember you can handle it all. You can. You can.

  • Autumn

    2004/09/12 at 8:48 pm


    I love your photos! I just want to thank you for making me laugh on nearly a daily basis. You have such a way with words. On Friday I was having a bad day, so I read some of your archived posts and an hour later I was rolling. I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes. You and your family are a blessing to so many people. I’m praying that Little Leta is fine. Just breathe and know that all is going to be fine.


  • Krissy

    2004/09/13 at 1:17 am

    Heather you rock.
    Best wishes xx

  • Jana

    2004/09/13 at 4:14 am

    Stalking is an underrated hobby.

    Good vibes out to you for the hospital visit. I think this definitely calls for some Doritos.

  • Gordon

    2004/09/13 at 4:44 am

    I’m sorry to hear you are worried about Leta, and I’m praying praying for good results from Leta’s checkup. (Not that I’m worried, mind you — I pray for my football team to win its ballgames.)

  • beachgal

    2004/09/13 at 4:53 am

    Wonderful pics from the last few days. Here’s to a good report from the doctor, tho I’m sure everything will be fine. Some babies just don’t want to walk or attempt to stand for some reason.

    Best wishes, and don’t worry too much.

  • dänika

    2004/09/13 at 5:03 am

    Praying for you three today; may everything go smoothly, dooce.

  • Mish

    2004/09/13 at 6:17 am

    I love it. Flower pics are my passion, but I focus on getting every petal and stamen and dust of pollen in crytsal clear focus. I love your stalker backgrounds. Learning something new everyday.

  • +mojan.

    2004/09/14 at 9:18 am

    Hi, Heather. I don’t mean to steal your thunder, but you should see the Obligatory Flower Picture from the Stalker’s Perspective on my site today. It might make you laugh.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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